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Touchy Feely


Gail

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Was sitting in on a great talk this morning about cultural barriers and effective communication. One of the examples mentioned was how in some cultures it is not appropriate to smile at someone until you know them well; it is seen as an unwelcome over-familiarity. Wow!

This kind of thing -- hugging in a group setting where it could feel exclusionary to those not comfortable with it -- strikes me as one of those "cultural barriers" or at least in a similar vein pertaining to the "subculture of one" carried by each of us as individuals.

What's the answer though? It would be a shame to have to give up on any efforts to foster warmth in this increasingly cold and distanced society. On the other hand these efforts should not be false or canned, nor should they be at the expense of those for whom it might seem overly familiar and have the opposite effect of making them feel uncomfortable and excluded. Any ideas? Obviously it is difficult to come up with a one-size-fits-all expression of warmth and care that everyone will be comfortable with. What's the solution then?

(By the way, christine h, thanks for your kind words. God bless you. )

"After such knowledge, what forgiveness?" -- T.S. Eliot
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No and No... I want to know someone quite well before they touch me or I them....

Clio

A heart where He alone has first place.

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I liked your post....and just wanted to add my 2 cents in.

Regardless of the condition of our chuch, of the problems it has, I am here to say that I know some very onfire, excited, warm, caring SDA people who would make anyone proud to know. I've been with them on mission trips and they are such neat loveable Christians. I think we need to focus on the positive and be a positive influence ourselves. Jesus is coming back soon! That is the greatest news in this world! Lets share it!

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Poster: JimBob7

Subject: Re: Touchy Feely

Anyone ever been to an Italian SDA church?

Do they shake hands, hold hands, hug and PINCH?

Duno....but lots of Spanish churches hug, put their cheeks next to yours and either kiss your cheek or the "air". Maybe not in the USA but in Spanish countries.

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Quote:

Quote:

So... do you think we are all comfortable enough with each other for a BIG GROUP HUG???

smile.gif


==========================

I'm ready on two conditions, no three! NO garlic breath! Single file only, no standing in a circle, we will leave that ritual for the Wicaans! No make up that has been applied with a puddy knife it could crash with my shaving cream.


hahahaha you are too funny!

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Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

So... do you think we are all comfortable enough with each other for a BIG GROUP HUG???

smile.gif


==========================

I'm ready on two conditions, no three! NO garlic breath! Single file only, no standing in a circle, we will leave that ritual for the Wicaans! No make up that has been applied with a puddy knife it could crash with my shaving cream.


hahahaha you are too funny!


Thanks Taylor for reading the truthfulness from my posts, the days that cannot be done, then I stay home since being truthful where it is very scarce is job one with me.

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Taylor,

I am Italian and a touchy feely kind of person. I have people who come every morning for their hugs from me as they come into the hosptial.

At church, I hug those who are hugable, and the rest of you non touchy people I leave alone.

I would love to attend an Italian church. I'll bet it would be just like home for me.

K

Proverbs 15:15

He that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast.

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K,

You just know that with my Italian/Jewish background I am naturedly a touchy feely person.

Most of the members at my church give hugs and it makes it feel like home. I did attend a predominately Italian church a few times and it was w o n d e r f u l! You would feel right at home.

Most of my Reps, ex-employees, various other associates and most of my clients always give me a hug when they see me. Now I realize that this is not the "business world" as mandated by law, but it sure does make it a lot nicer. Most of us who are in the "people" business need to feel that bit of skin-touch connection. We are more productive. It's difficult for me to believe that everyone doesn't need a quota of hugs ... every day!

One doesn't have to wonder who is hugable, you know it! . And that's fine. Whatever trips your trigger.

To be perfectly clear, I realize that there are many kinds of hugs .... I am not referring to a full-body hug. Or one from a total stranger, even then I have no problem with a light pat on the arm. As one knows when someone is not hugable, you also know when a person's hug is out-of-line.

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/soapbox.gif" alt="" /> And, my final reason for hugs vs handshakes: Hugs are more sanitary than a handshake! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Just my :2cents:

Naomi

If your dreams are not big enough to scare you, they are not big enough for God

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