Stan Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED: 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats. 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food. 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair. 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap. GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED: 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree. 2) Wrinkles don't hurt. 3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts. 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground. 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside. 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy. GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD 1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional. 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there. 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster. 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE: 1) You believe in Santa Claus. 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus. 3) You are Santa Claus. 4) You look like Santa Claus. SUCCESS: At age 4 success is . ....... not peeing in your pants. At age 12 success is . . ... having friends. At age 16 success is . . . ..having a drivers license. At age 35 success is . . ... having money. At age 50 success is . . ... having money. At age 70 success is . . . ..having a drivers license. At age 75 success is . . ... having friends. At age 80 success is . . ... not peeing in your pants. Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day. Have a wonderful day with many *smiles* Take the time to live!!! Quote If you receive benefit to being here please help out with expenses. https://www.paypal.me/clubadventist Administrator of a few websites like https://adventistdating.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators Naomi Posted November 9, 2004 Administrators Share Posted November 9, 2004 They are lots of fun to read, even the 37th time; and lots of truth in them. Quote If your dreams are not big enough to scare you, they are not big enough for God Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators Gail Posted November 9, 2004 Administrators Share Posted November 9, 2004 Yes, I always love this stuff. Thanks for sharing, Boss! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Quote Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Jeannieb43 Posted November 9, 2004 Moderators Share Posted November 9, 2004 Delightful! Thanks, Stan, for all you do for all of us here on CA. Quote Jeannie<br /><br /><br />...Change is inevitable; growth is optional.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stan Posted November 10, 2004 Author Share Posted November 10, 2004 Thank you so much Jeannie for your kind words. you are such a 'keeper'. Quote If you receive benefit to being here please help out with expenses. https://www.paypal.me/clubadventist Administrator of a few websites like https://adventistdating.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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