Men's Dress

[cricket]

The fact that you are wearing suit and tie may cause a CULTURALLY TRIGGERED EMBEDDED response of respect and reverence, but eventually you will be received by your actions and words and no suit is going to cover those up.

Perhaps one of the most insightful posts I've seen here in a long time! Thank you!

[Woody]

Quote:

The fact that you are wearing suit and tie may cause a CULTURALLY TRIGGERED EMBEDDED response

There's that word again. It seems that a lot of people and things are embedded these days.

[Dr. Shane]

But there is more than that. Not only does the way we dress create a first impression on others, studies show it actually impacts how we view ourselves. Much like bathing. Studies have shown those battling depression that will bathe daily will have greater success with treating it.

[cricket]

The only reason it changes the way a person views himself is because it has been implanted in his mind that it makes him somehow "different". It is a learned response, a reaction of thought based on societal influences and cultural paradigms.

[fccool]

studies show it actually impacts how we view ourselves.

Once again, Shane... these sound like news headlines. Studies show... scientists discovered. You know what I'm talking about. I will repeat again, suits and ties are a norm of Western Culture. People in Scotland were wearing skirts to make themselves feel better. People in Africa are wearing things that resemble dresses, and some people don't wear hardly anything at all and don't view themselves as less confident. We need to look outside and ask ourselves, why is it that wearing a certain thing makes me feel more confident, while wearing other diminishes that confidence? It has very little to do with clothing, but with overall view of ourselves as individuals. I can wear a $500 suit and feel confident as a result... or I can just bypass the $500 dollar suit part and still feel confident. It's a mindset issue.

Just some stats here by the same people who conducted the "clothes" studies I'm sure.

Most Will Be Mentally Ill at Some Point, Study Says

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/06/07/health/07mental.html

It's amazing what people consider to be mental illness nowadays!!! Kids are being fed Ritalin for having "ADHD". Those kids don't have ADHD... they can pay attention to the video games they are playing for hours at a time, and they have no trouble following a movie they like . So I hope you understand my distrust in such studies. Many of these are funded by the same corporations that are not without partiality as far as how the results will turn out.

[Dr. Shane]

Actually, my company is doing business in Africa and it is the only time my boss will wear a tie. Businessmen must wear ties in Africa if they expect to be able to do business. Certainly different cultures have different expectations.

Quote:

The only reason it changes the way a person views himself is because it has been implanted in his mind that it makes him somehow "different". It is a learned response, a reaction of thought based on societal influences and cultural paradigms.

Perception is reality. Cultural norms "implanted" in one's mind are very much a reality. Just as the cultural norms "implanted" in the minds of others. So regardless of why dress impacts our self-image, the fact remains that it does.

[fccool]

My reality might be different from yours then as I can only speak for myself.

[Neil D]

My reality might be different from yours then as I can only speak for myself.

Yeah, we noticed that Shane's reality is a bit different...

...and is not shy about telling us all about it...

[fccool]

I think Shane is a really cool guy, in his own special way

[Neil D]

Yeah, with all the grief I give him, he actually is...

[Woody]

... in his own special way.

[carolaa]

It's amazing what people consider to be mental illness nowadays!!! Kids are being fed Ritalin for having "ADHD". Those kids don't have ADHD... they can pay attention to the video games they are playing for hours at a time, and they have no trouble following a movie they like . So I hope you understand my distrust in such studies.

It's quite true that some kids with ADHD can focus on a video game or a movie, but that doesn't take away from the fact that they have difficulty focusing in general. Video games and movies are very fast-paced so are easier to focus on.

[fccool]

are very fast-paced so are easier to focus on

I find these boring and hard for me to focus on . Do I have ADHD?

Isn't a "focus" then a matter of interest and excess energy?

[carolaa]

are very fast-paced so are easier to focus on

I find these boring and hard for me to focus on . Do I have ADHD?

Isn't a "focus" then a matter of interest and excess energy?

No, it has to do with the way your brain is wired. Excess energy applies only to the hyperactive aspect of ADHD, which about 2/3 of those with ADHD have, and drugs can be helpful for some of them. Interest can be helpful, but not significantly. The fact that ADHD is usually hereditary is a good indicator that it is a physical problem.

[fccool]

I'm speaking from experience here, and I'm glad that Ritalin was not invented a decade earlier. When I was a kid I was extremely hyperactive and lacked concentration as I was dreaming off and constantly making up "what if" situations in my head. It was easy for me to be wound up to the point of perspiration because of minor things too.

Somebody gave my parents advice to get me involved in sports, and particularly swimming as it is a sport that would drain the most energy from the body. They did and it fixed the problem. I was more alert and excess energy was sublimated instead of being suppressed.

Today such things that considered to be ADHD, 20 years ago were considered to be a normal and expected behavior of a child with excess energy (hyperactive). It's not a mind, but body (endocrine system) deviation... and not necessarily a problem. What schools seek to do is to fit a child into a box if the teaching style is not working, then make it a "child" problem not responding to the learning style and not the other way around. Which is to recognize that different individual respond to different learning styles. Such problems could be easily solved by home schooling as these were, and I read testimonies of many heartbroken parents of "ADHD" children who resorted to homeschooling and it saved their child. Suppressing hyperactivity via drugs could potentially lead to overdoing it too much, or body trying to release the excess energy in other ways. And that aspect of the adverse effects has not been tested as only short term effects are considered.

I'm no Tom Cruse, but I would not advice "fixing up" the mind of your child by way of drugs. But it's a subject of another thread so:

[carolaa]

I'm speaking from experience here, and I'm glad that Ritalin was not invented a decade earlier. When I was a kid I was extremely hyperactive and lacked concentration as I was dreaming off and constantly making up "what if" situations in my head. It was easy for me to be wound up to the point of perspiration because of minor things too.

Somebody gave my parents advice to get me involved in sports, and particularly swimming as it is a sport that would drain the most energy from the body. They did and it fixed the problem. I was more alert and excess energy was sublimated instead of being suppressed.

Today such things that considered to be ADHD, 20 years ago were considered to be a normal and expected behavior of a child with excess energy (hyperactive). It's not a mind, but body (endocrine system) deviation... and not necessarily a problem. What schools seek to do is to fit a child into a box if the teaching style is not working, then make it a "child" problem not responding to the learning style and not the other way around. Which is to recognize that different individual respond to different learning styles. Such problems could be easily solved by home schooling as these were, and I read testimonies of many heartbroken parents of "ADHD" children who resorted to homeschooling and it saved their child. Suppressing hyperactivity via drugs could potentially lead to overdoing it too much, or body trying to release the excess energy in other ways. And that aspect of the adverse effects has not been tested as only short term effects are considered.

I'm no Tom Cruse, but I would not advice "fixing up" the mind of your child by way of drugs. But it's a subject of another thread so:

Since I started this topic, I guess I can take it wherever I want to....

I agree with you that a lot of kids are prescribed drugs that really could be helped other ways. I agree that these drugs often have undesirable side effects. Twenty years ago we didn't know much about ADHD. Kids ran around more and the hyperactive aspect wasn't as noticeable as it is today. However, kids still got yelled at for not "paying attention," and many still suffer self esteem issues as adults because no matter how hard they try, they can't focus or remember things.

Homeschooling and athletics do help some kids, though that isn't the total answer for kids who are truly ADHD. True ADHD does not get better with age (although the hyperactivity aspect can mellow some with age), but you have it your whole life and you have to learn to live with it through meds and/or counseling (to learn coping skills and deal with self esteem issues).

Schools do have a difficult challenge with kids who are ADHD. The kids who have attention deficit w/o being hyperactive are tolerated better, but they struggle greatly. It's amazing what drugs can do for some of these kids, whether they are hyperactive or not, just to be able to focus and connect dots without being all over the map. It absolutely gives them a new lease on life.

As with all physical ailments, I would use drugs as a last resort, but I certainly would not rule them out.

[fccool]

Calol,

All would be good and well, but gifted kids are over diagnosed today just because of their healthy tendency to dream and change focus, which is often mistaken to be a "brain disorder". So these kids partaking in psychosuppressants is of concern to me and critics of these in general. It is hard to distinguish between the two sometimes, just like it is with depression or anxiety. These are psychological and should be treated as such IMO. The drugs do what they do best, and it is suppressing the symptoms, and they seldom fix the core of the problem. There are other ways, such as prevention and changing environment factors. , such as food, sleep, activity patterns and etc.

Doctors today seek to cure everything with drugs and seldom address the core issues of cause and prevention. Not only many don't see it as their jobs to do so, but they don't see it in their best interest either. We spend all of the research and money finding a perfect drug that would "cure" this and that, but we neglect prevention which would hunt down the real problem.

So I don't disagree with you that some kids may benefit and get a hold on their bodies and minds by way of drugs, but these are extreme cases, which are few IMO. I have not encountered such kids in my lifetime yet, and I have dealt with MANY kids. But when I read in Washington post that 9% of the kids supposedly have ADHD and these should be medicated... a bell goes off in my head. I hope you can see where I'm coming from on this.