Woody Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 That's the problem. There isn't much of a review. And there ain't much explanation or learning experiences with this. So, I don't expect it. You won't be next unless you happen to question a personal attack post by someone high up. But, I do appreciate all the concern about me and the interest in what happened. Let me just point out how many YOU's are in the post of concern. Perhaps one thing we should discourage is the use of the word YOU in a condemning or critical way. I do hope that I will get an answer to my question about HOW one can report or question a post of THE Moderator. And YES. Ain't Neil Good. What good talent we have access to here on the Forum. I can't wait to find out what happens to me next. Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Okay Neil. We are waiting ... This is a holiday. You should be spending your holiday with us. Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Okay Neil. We are waiting ... This is a holiday. You should be spending your holiday with us. You think that writing these thing is on the tip of my tongue!?!?!? Why do I have a writing LAB-BOR-IT-TORY?????? Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 We have a very high opinion of you. And expect great things. Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 [Cue the Green Hornet music] Welcome back to The Redwood Dilemma Starring-Redwood His wife, Blanche Genie Sponsored by ClubAdventist, a place for all memebers of the SDA Church to come in safety and fellowship. AND BY- The Yoda Forum, along with the moderators of ClubAdventist [Yoda voice]" If posting doesn't necessitate, [strong male voice] we couldn't moderate" Narrator: We last left our faithful protagonist in jail contemplating the errors of his ways Redwood: But I didnt cause any errors! Narrator: As I said, we left Redwood in jail... Genie: I have formulated a plan to get you out of this mess... Redwood: Mess!!! I'll say it is a mess. I'm suppost to be making money, according to my wish...but you didn't say that it would be illegal money.... Genie: I am sorry, master. But the wish doesn't necessairily make that distinction. Redwood: Well, I don't care. I want out of this jail, without anymore legal problems and I get the full three wishes... Genie: Sorry, master, but I can only give you the other two, and since you have used up one more, i will get you out of jail legally. Redwood: What????? I have used up one other wish, and I don't even know what it is... Genie: you want out of jail legally.... Redwood: Oh...Ok...but that includes all member of my family, not just me. This is your bungle and there needs to be a bit of the adjustment because of you... Genie: We will make the allowances and make good on our bungle...We don't want you reporting us to the Genie Union and about messing up the wishes.... Redwood: "Genie Union"??? Genie: It's nothing, master...[Redwood stares at him]...Ok, you lodge a complain, they will review your wishes, and will find some way to get out of all the wishes...You want that? Redwood: Nope. Genie: Ok, now the plan.....I do a bit of magic, the evidence disappears, I get a witness who takes the fall for you, you get out of jail free Redwood: Not sure I like that ... Genie: What's not to like? You get out of jail, someone else confesses, you're freee as a bird.. Redwood: it's that part...I don't like that part.. Genie: You want to stay in jail??? Cus I can arrange that. Redwood: No, don't like that either...it's that other part..the part that someone else confesses... Genie: What's not to like? You are off the hook... Redwood: But it's the other innocent that confesses.. Genie: Oh, that...don't worry. It's an animatronic. Redwood: Anima-What???? Genie: Animatronic...um...it's sort of like an advanced robot. So, he confesses and either serves your sentenc or rusts... Redwood: Wont they figure it out when he passes thru the metal detectors in prison? Genie: no problem...we make him out of ceramics. Redwood:What happens when he ...or I...get into a fight... Genie: We make him a bit harder, and he wont break... Redwood:Will he sound like me? Genie: Weeelll, he will kinda sound like you.... Redwood: Will he sound like a um, you know, robotish? Genie: well, he might have a few imperfections... Redwood: Tain't gonna work...Find another plan... Genie: Well, we can break out... Redwood: Now, wait a minute...Your plan may need some modifications... [cue Batman music] Narrator: What plan does Redwood come up with? More importantly, will it work? Redwood: What do you mean "Will it work? It's my plan, it's gotta work! narrator: Well, there you have it folks...It's gonna work...So, Redwood, What's the plan? Redwood: I can't tell NOW...I'm still working out details with the Genie.... Narrator: Join us next time when we hear Blanch say- Blanch: Come on, big boy? What will it take to let me have the keys....? Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 We have a very high opinion of you. And expect great things. OOOOooooohhhhh boy....Here's a reciepe for disaster.... and the gremlins are visiting my house, and I am having writer's cramps.... dang'ed fingers...wont do what they are supposed to do....write, create, make sensible fun reading material, cerebral candy....come on boys... Where's my Dr. Jeckyl medicine? Oh Redwood, you know those poppys that you have??????? Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Quote: cerebral candy.... Please give us as much of that as you can. We love it. I have been havin a case of cerebralitis ... do you think this candy would help my ailment? Quote: Oh Redwood, you know those poppys that you have??????? Look. I am already in enough trouble here for my poppy trafficin. I have had too much traffic comin here as it is. I for sure can't have any more traffic .... like havin you come here. Sorry. No invitation. Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 [Cue the music "The Lone Ranger] Narrator: It the the Redwood Dilema Starring Redwood as Redwood Genie as Genie Blanche as Blanche and a couple of non-discript types as needed. We last left our fearful protagonist making plans on how to circumvent the Judicial system with Genie-The scene takes place at the local jailhouse. Redwood with a jailsuit with the numbers 1234 on the front and back of suit. Genie: Do you think that will work? Redwood:It's gotta work! Genie:Well, hopefully, you can get outta here by 9/11. Redwood:I want it to work! I want out of here...See that guy over there. Genie:Yeah.... Redwood:Well, he's been lookin' at me...kinda hungry like...gives me the creeps... Genie:We have got to get you out of here. Ok, I am filing a brief with the court and your animontronics is out and about Redwood: Thank you and let's get this process moving. and the sooner the better...I don't think that guy over there is gonna wait much longer... Genie: Um, what ever you do, grab what ever you need in your pocket.... Redwood: Why? there's nothing in my pocket....or is there? Genie:Just reach in and get what's there... Redwood:Are there keys?? Genie:Whatever you need... Redwood:Ok, let's see.[gets something out of pocket] Look at that...keys! Genie:There ya go... Redwood:Can't do it. Genie:What?!?! Redwood:I can't do that...I will be running for the rest of my life... Genie:Ok..[poof! keys dissappear] Redwood: Hey, wait a minute. What's happening with Blanch? Genie:I don't think you wanna know. Redwood:that's all I need to know. Let's have them keys back. Genie:Get them yourself...in your pocket. [Redwood reaches into pocket, and sure enough there is this credit card key.] Redwood:This ain't gonna work. not on these bars and grills... Genie:Never underestimate a genie...Try it. Slide it between the bars and the door. Redwood:Ok, [does as genie suggests, and the door opens] Genie: See...NEVER underestimate The genie.... As Redwood goes out the door, a couple of prisoners see him and head for the door. Redwood closes the door and says, Redwood: Shussh, guys...Gonna be right back...[The door closes and locks fast. ] Redwood makes his way to the womens jail facilities, unbeknowns to the guards, duo to an invisibility cloak borrowed from Harry Potter via his pocket. Redwood observes Blanche going from guard to guard trying to get keys from them to get out. Redwood: Blanche, what are you doing? Blanche:Trying to get out.[catches herself talking to nothing or thinks there is nothing. cautiously wispers-] Redwood??? Where are you????? Redwood:Right here. Come on over to the door... Blanch:Why [as she moves over to the door.]? I must be nuts. I am talking to a voice that sounds like Redwood. Redwood: If the door opens, will it convince you that I am here? Blanche: Oh, yeah, like that's going to [door opens] happen....[she says weakly] Redwood: Come on... Blanch: uh, right....ok...where are we going? Blanch and Redwood make it back to Redwoods cell, open the door, and takes off the invisiblity cloak. The other prisoners are talking among themselves. The guards havent noticed Redwoods disappearance nor his and Blanche's reappearance in the corner of the room. Prisoner a: [loudly] Hey, what we gots here? Redwood: Um, guys...let's not go there. Prisoner b: And why not, you pyoo-neey little twirp? Redwood: [As he pulls out a 50 caliber rubber bullet machine gun] 'Cuz you guys don't want to get hurt now, do you? Prisoner c: I don't know. I thinks we can risk it, eh boys? Redwood starts firing, causing the prisoners to fall and clutch thier chests and arms and legs. Of course, the noise attracts the attention of the guards, who immediately signal a Lock Down. Genie: Guards, as an officer of the court, I demand to know how this female prisoner got into a male facility and how this prisoner/my client got a specialized weapon in said facility??? Warden:[dumbfounded and quietly says] I am sure we don't know... Genie: I demand that you take my client and his wife back to court immediately Warden: How did you know that it was his wife? Genie: Who else is he gonna defend this vigiorously? Warden: What about say a young pretty damsel in distress? Genie: Hey! This is his wife. SHE doesn't want this going there. Blanche: Darn tootin' I don't! Scene Two The Court Room Judge: and because the prisoner returned to his cell, albeit with his wife, the court finds that the prisoner is NOT a bad man and is willing to move his court date up to today. Prosecutor: Your honor, I object. We can't possibly get evidence together... Judge: You want to explain the jail house secenerio, with a logical explaination? Genie: I doubt there IS a logical explaination. At that moment, a policeman files into the courtroom and up to the prosecutor. Policeman: Mr. Prosecutor, we found this man trying to collect the poppy flowers after we had raided Redwood's house... Prosecutor: Who is this guy? Policeman: well, he goes by the name of Ichabod, sir. And he kinda looks like him [pointing to Redwood] Judge: Gentlemen, do you have a case or not? Prosecutor: Apparently, we don't your honor. We formally request that all charges be dropped against Redwood and Blanche. Redwood Blanche, and Genie cheer. Narrator: ....And that explains how Redwood got to be known as a 'shady drug manufactoror' and how all the charges against him got dropped. And he lived happily ever after...... Epiloge Scene: the Jail house. Ichabod puts on the jail suit with the numbers 1234...Reaches into the pocket and pull out a credit card........ and Bravus says:Hauntingly beautiful stuff Stay tuned next week, same time, same club for the next exciting adventure...... Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Quote: Narrator: ....And that explains how Redwood got to be known as a 'shady drug manufactoror' and how all the charges against him got dropped. And he lived happily ever after...... Praise God. I am so glad to be found innocent. My name is now vindicated both on this Forum and in this story. I am kickin my heals. Thanks Neil. But I do feel bad for Ichabod. What can we do for him to get him off the hook? Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 eeeehhhh, let him write his own story....he's an author... Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz Posted September 3, 2008 Author Share Posted September 3, 2008 Hooray!!!! (Neil, I thought that there was a clapping smilie, but I couldn't find it, so I am giving you a flower. Could it be a......? ) Quote For what will a man be profited, if he gains the whole world, and forfeits his soul? Mat. 16:26Please, support the JDRF and help find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes. Please, support the March of Dimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Don't even suggest that we have such things on this Forum Liz !!! Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 Quote: (Neil, I thought that there was a clapping smilie, but I couldn't find it, so I am giving you a flower. Could it be a......? ) Thank you for the smilie with the flower...one present does indeed deserve another....but I am a little confused.... The question "Could it be a.....?" is not as clear as it should be and I flunked mind reading in the third grade...Are you asking for a sequal???? If so, I am not sure you are asking the right fellow..Ask Ichy...he a writer...He's authored at least one book and ghosted another, I am told... I am sure that if you asked nicely, begged in a groveling fashion, threaten within an inch of his life, bribed to the proper amount, he will give you a sequal....maybe... Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz Posted September 4, 2008 Author Share Posted September 4, 2008 Uh, no, Neil, I wasn't asking for a sequel...not that you couldn't do one. I was trying to be clever, and obviously failed. I was giving you a flower....that might possibly be......a poppy. Get it?? Get it?? A poppy. Don't feel bad, I tend to have to explain myself a lot. Oh, well, I thought it was clever. Quote For what will a man be profited, if he gains the whole world, and forfeits his soul? Mat. 16:26Please, support the JDRF and help find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes. Please, support the March of Dimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil D Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 Duh!!!!! OOOOooooh, my forehead...I hate it when I hit it thusly... Quote Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 5, 2008 Share Posted September 5, 2008 Online poppies is just over the top. I'm already in enough trouble with my poppies. I don't want to be responsible for providing them online. Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woody Posted September 5, 2008 Share Posted September 5, 2008 BTW. Please keep me in your prayers for my 9-11 court date. (One week from today.) Quote May we be one so that the world may be won. Christian from the cradle to the grave I believe in Hematology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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