A REAL ISSUE in life

[Stan]

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

Hmmm... I mostly agree with the point being made here. It's just a hard lesson to learn that dad and mom were once upon a time kids who saw their parents do messed up things too. And it's even harder to learn how to move away from being like that when you don't have anyone to show you how. God finally sent me my best friend who's been showing me how, but I had to wait through 30 years of abuse in my family before meeting him. The rest of the time I was just written off as being some kind of freak for not knowing better how to get along with people.

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

I'm not concerned with the four-letter words, the smoking, the yelling... It's much more subtle than that, and has nothing to do with sins or needing Salvation from them, or even with our kids doing what we do.

It has to do with our not showing them how to be socially capable, civilized human beings, through our own examples, as well as talking out different mature ways of handling "problem people" and difficult situations.

It's our own inner-anger rather than inner-Peace, the self-loathing rather than pride in Who's we are, the controlling natures rather than self-controlled natures, the fear rather than trust in God, ourselves, and each other, the dishonesty rather than openness and being unwalled, the inability to express affection rather than Loving and Liking everyone around us, the... Emotions aren't sins, but can cause sins, but what's more important than that is what all these negative emotions do to one's own physical and emotional health, as well as the health of those around them.

The problem isn't what we are doing, so much as what we aren't doing that sets a good example: sometimes, we're just not being genuinely affectionate people who Trust God with everything in our lives. We might pray to Him, but then we tack on, "But if it be your will..." It's God's Will to give us better Gifts than we'd Give our own children, not stones for loaves of bread, when we completely Trust Him to do that, yet we teach them to pray in fear that He'll let us down...

We teach our kids to look at the God, each other, and us with the same eyes and hearts that we have when we look at God, each other, and them. We show them how to have the same inward spirits that we have. It's only up to us to want better for ourselves, and it's up to us to Ask and Trust God to do the Work in our hearts to make that possible, and also to forgive ourselves when the paint isn't yet dry.

[Jeannieb43]

So true.

Children learn what they see.

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

AMELIA

YES it is out selfishness and not trusting in GOD

this is true. also our fears.

but that was the sins of Isreal of old not trusting

GOD and being selfish.

I agree that we need to look through the sames eyes

as GOD at every person and show them that people

who our true chrsitians can made a difference in

peoples lives.

dgrimm60

Thank you for comparing this discussion to Israel. I appreciate that.

Also, my name isn't Amelia. I have a similar screen name to someone else who used to come here but I haven't seen back here in years. I'd prefer not to publicly disclose my name, due to an incident a few months back with some former Adventist cult people, and how I posted some tips here at CA about how to recognize cultists early on, and what to do when faced with them.

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

Correction:

The problem isn't what we are doing, so much as what we aren't doing that sets a good example:

Should Read:

The problem isn't what we are doing, so much as what we aren't doing, and we set a bad example:

Sorry, my post no longer has the "Edit" link on it.

[Dottie]

This is a poem I've had for a long time, since college.

Children Learn What They Live

By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.

If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.

If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.

If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.

If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.

If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.

If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.

If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.

If children live with fairness, they learn justice.

If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.

If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.

If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

This is a poem I've had for a long time, since college.

Children Learn What They Live

By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.

If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.

If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.

If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.

If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.

If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.

If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.

If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.

If children live with fairness, they learn justice.

If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.

If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.

If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live

The only one I disagree with is the one about pity. Children who are not treated right will always grow up pitying themselves, even if it's masked by "cold hard stares" on their tear-less faces. Pity is not a crime - it's a fact of human nature, and really, it's sometimes a good thing. It keeps us from becoming stone cold and hard.

[ChildOfGod4Ever]

ChildOFGOD4Ever

sorry about calling you the wrong name

dgrimm60

It's ok. I knew it was a risk when I signed up. Someone else already had the name ChildOfGodForEver. But that name so fits me to a T that I wanted it anyway, so I just used a "4" instead. And figured if I ever got mixed up with that other person, apparently someone named Amelia, then I'd just deal with it from there. Heh. It's taken years for that to happen... So, sorry to Amelia - I wasn't trying to impose on your SN, I just am also a Child of God.

Happy Sabbath :)