How to write good

[Neil D]

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)

4. Employ the vernacular.

5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.

7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

8. Contractions aren't necessary.

9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

10. One should never generalize.

11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."

12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.

13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

14. Profanity sucks.

15. Be more or less specific.

16. Understatement is always best.

17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

20. The passive voice is to be avoided.

21. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

22. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

23. Who needs rhetorical questions?

[Guest]

I will remember those next time I write.

[Nan]

Contractions are very necessary if you want to have a baby.

[phkrause]

Did you come up with these yourself Neil, or did you find them on the web?

pk

[olger]

I ain't got no writin skills neither

[Gerr]

Shouldn't that be, "How to write well?"

[Woody]

Quote:

Profanity sucks.

This is a good one to remember especially on this forum.

[Stan]

Neil... am thinking some might not be getting this...

[Jeannieb43]

Neil... am thinking some might not be getting this...

Oh yes, Stan! I got it. But good. :-)

Every single one of those rules contained irony.

Very funny!

Thanks, Neil, for brightening my day.

[Liz]

We really need that "like" button, that they have on facebook. Too funny, Neil.

[Neil D]

Neil... am thinking some might not be getting this...

Stan! ....are you suggesting that the intelligence quotient might be on a subpar level for the average user? I would never suggest such a thing!

On the contrary, if they get, ok...if they don't, that's ok too....

[Guest]

We get it Stan.

[Gail]

Where's dAb when you need him?

I enjoyed this a LOT! Thank for sharing it, Neil! Needless to say I will continue to use words like albeit and notwithstanding just cause I like them so much. AND akimbo.

@ Nan: Yes, pregnant women and YOU are allowed to use contractions, as long as you use apostrophe s in the right way.

For those who don't get it: Never mind... LOL

[Woody]

Quote:

as long as you use apostrophe s in the right way.

I agree with Gail that the Apostles should be used in the right way.

[phkrause]

Either you Redwood or Gail have misspelled that word. LOLOLOLOL

pk

[Gail]

I spelled it correctly for being in Canada.

[Woody]

Either you Redwood or Gail have misspelled that word. LOLOLOLOL

pk

I think we are both thinkin' on different tracks.

[phkrause]

I know Gail that you spelled the word correctly, and Redwood spelled his correctly. Redwood was just kidding you with what he said. That's why I said what I said. From redwood's latter post I think he figured out what I was joking about, but we know that you canadians are a little slow. LOL

pk

[Bravus]

If you're thinkin' on the tracks you're liable to get hit by a train...

[Robert]

Neil... am thinking some might not be getting this...

It should be, "How to write well"

[Woody]

Yes. As usual Rob ... you are right on target on the right track.

[Gail]

It should be, "How to write well"

That was the point.

[Gail]

pk, I know that redwood was only kidding. I was playing with him back in return. It's all part of the fun... just until dgrimm starts talking football in the wrong place!

[Woody]

Originally Posted By: Robert

It should be, "How to write well"

That was the point.

Either way ... it was well written and was good.

[phkrause]

He does like to hijack threads doesn't he. LOL

pk