Forgive and not forget

[Stan]

Powerful

[LifeHiscost]

She is a woman truly free.

I remember that picture well and can only imagine the long journey taken to become the beautiful woman she is today.

"Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed."John 8:36 NKJV

God blesses!

[GreatLakesGramma]

She is correct. "Forgive and forget" is not a biblical concept.

[Tom Wetmore]

A Biblical description of God's forgiveness - "I will remember their sins no more."

Sounds like God forgives and forgets.

It's admittedly not humanly possible since we do not have a delete button for our brain. But with God all things are possible. I look forward to the day that God does a memory wipe on my brain so that I can remember my sins and those against me no more, just as he says He does.

[cricket]

Isn't it somewhere in Psalms (I think the 51st) that talks about blotting out our sins? Sometimes I think of that as "whiteing out" our sins...where they're still there, underneath, but just covered up so no one can see them. Makes me also think about wearing Jesus' robe of righteousness...so that the Father does not see our sins.

To me, personally, it feels like a lie.

Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this way.

Dunno.

[GreatLakesGramma]

There is nowhere in the Bible that says WE must forgive and forget. Just as Kim Phuc says, to forget is to allow wrongs to be perpetuated. We are told to hold those who have wronged us accountable for their wrongs.

Jesus' own words: "Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that 'BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY WORD MAY BE ESTABLISHED.' And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

[Tom Wetmore]

The text you quote is not speaking of forgiveness, but setting things to right with a brother. It is about reconciliation. That exists as a final goal where forgiveness happens. What Jesus did say about forgiveness was that we are to forgive as our Father in heaven forgives. Scripture, both in the OT and NT, states plainly that God forgives and remembers our sins no more. I think we are to do likewise, according to what Jesus said. This is not a passive forgetting as we humans so often are prone to do. It is an active and intentional act of putting it out of the mind. It requires that the forgiver not bring it up again or ever hold that wrong against the wrong doer again. It is the attribute of love of not keeping an account of wrongs. It is a divine gift to be able to forgive so completely that the wrong never comes to mind again.

[GreatLakesGramma]

You're ignoring the last part: "But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector." Matthew 18:17

If the person repents, yes, it should be put behind one. But toward the unrepentant, to forget is to allow the wrong to be repeated. Then you become party to the subsequent sin.

And even the genuinely repentant sometimes need someone to remember, to hold them accountable so they don't fall back into the same patterns.

[Woody]

Quote:

A Biblical description of God's forgiveness - "I will remember their sins no more.

Oh but it's much better than that. He buries them in the depts of the sea so that He has not further access to them.

Quote:

" He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea." Micah 7:19

and our prophet puts it this way:

Quote:

"The Lord by His power revealed the mistakes and errors that the brethren were committing, and those souls who had sincere love for God opened their minds and hearts to receive the light that was sent of God, and He forgave the mistakes they made, and through His great mercy cast their mistakes and errors into the depths of the sea. Now since God has thus covered their errors, who will presume to uncover them, and to present them to the world? Who has authorized any one to present God's chosen, adopted children to the world, clothed in a robe of darkness?" EGW --Ms 27, 1894, p. 1. (To "Dear Brethren in the Seventh-day Adventist Faith," June 7, 1894.)

[LifeHiscost]

let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

And how does Jesus treat the heathen and the tax collector?

"For the Son of Man came to seek and save those who are lost.”"Luke 19:10 NLT

God blesses!

[Woody]

Originally Posted By: GreatLakesGramma

let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

And how does Jesus treat the heathen and the tax collector?

Good Point there LHC

We are to treat them even better than our fellow church members.

[Stan]

forgiveness benefits and heals the one that was hurt, not that other person.

[Gail]

...This is not a passive forgetting as we humans so often are prone to do. It is an active and intentional act of putting it out of the mind. It requires that the forgiver not bring it up again or ever hold that wrong against the wrong doer again. It is the attribute of love of not keeping an account of wrongs. It is a divine gift to be able to forgive so completely that the wrong never comes to mind again.

I like what you have said about it being "not a passive forgetting," but a deliberate act (often a sacrificial one).

And over time you may very well forget! Or at least if you remember you remember it in a different way.

There may be some repentant people who would wish that the damage they've done to others would have been not only forgiven but forgotten, too.

Forgiveness is a very BIG, far-reaching concept.

[Tom Wetmore]

Yes, it is a big deal! So big that Jesus died for it. As you can see from the signature in al my posts I say, "Forgiveness is always good news. And that is the gospel truth!"

And the church where I attend repeats as group at the close of every service, "For Jesus sake, I will love and forgive everyone I meet."

[Dr. Shane]

This is not a passive forgetting as we humans so often are prone to do. It is an active and intentional act of putting it out of the mind. It requires that the forgiver not bring it up again or ever hold that wrong against the wrong doer again.

[Tom Wetmore]

Forgive and and exercise wisdom and caution by helping that person avoid getting themselves into a mess again with you or anyone else. Seeing that person through new eyes, seeing them in the light of forgiveness, wishing for them a better life, free of the guilt of more sin is a way of putting the past behind you - forgetting, sort of.

We must forgive always. But reconciliation may not be possible in every broken relationship. Forgiveness is hard and essential work that one side can do quite on their own. Reconciliation is even harder in part because it requires rebuilding trust and full cooperation between both sides. That requires the wrong-doer to put a whole lot of effort into restoring confidence of change and recognizing that new relationship rules will have to apply. This does not happen overnight. It takes time and sometimes distance. And sometimes a restraining order to protect the innocent.

[GreatLakesGramma]

That requires the wrong-doer to put a whole lot of effort into restoring confidence of change and recognizing that new relationship rules will have to apply.

And sometimes the wrong-doer has no remorse and no desire to change. Then forgetting would be dangerous.

On another note, I would love to forget the things I would never have known about if my husband hadn't confessed them to me, but he doesn't want me to. He considers my knowing to be his safety net to prevent him from repeating the same behavior. I hope and pray that someday he won't need that, because I would much prefer to forget, or at least to pretend that none of it ever happened.