Teens' rings are pledge of purity

[Amelia]

Teens' rings are pledge of purity

Abstinence programs are popular, but critics say they don't provide enough safe-sex info

By JOHN SEEWER

Associated Press

Published: Saturday, 06/11/05

TOLEDO, Ohio — When Katie Chromik put a silver ring on her finger and promised at church to save sex for marriage, her junior high school friends giggled.

"Some people have made bets on me that I'm not going to make it," she said. "It just makes me more determined."

Even if pledging purity draws snickers, it's still gaining acceptance among some teens, especially those who attend Christian schools and churches. They say they're standing up to a barrage of sex-related messages.

"It comes at you in every direction," said Kayla Ballmer, an eighth-grader at Toledo Christian School. "Movies, TV, radio, magazines. Even on clothing."

The movement is driven by Christian educators and religious groups promoting abstinence education.

The Silver Ring Thing, backed by $1.2 million in federal grants since 2003, is one such program. It has expanded its reach in the United States and internationally, growing the most in South Africa, where HIV/AIDS is spreading. A year ago, founder Denny Pattyn took his message to England and Scotland, and he plans a DVD-based program to reach even more young people.

The organization, based in suburban Pittsburgh, puts on shows at churches nationwide that include Saturday-Night-Live-style skits, music videos and a message of abstinence. Young people are given silver rings and decide if they want to pledge to abstain from sex.

Three out of four choose to wear the ring, Pattyn said.

Critics say the message is too focused on abstinence alone, which is hard to maintain and, if broken, can lead to unprotected sex and a higher risk of disease.

Deb Hauser of Advocates for Youth, which promotes education about birth control, also said that the abstinence-only groups teach young people that condoms fail more often than they really do.

"The question is, are they doing more damage than good?" Hauser said.

But Pattyn contends that the safe-sex message taught in schools has failed. Young people, ages 15-24, account for about half the new cases of sexually transmitted diseases in the U.S. annually.

Funding for the Silver Ring Thing program also has drawn criticism.

The American Civil Liberties Union filed a lawsuit May 16 that accused the federal government of improperly using taxpayer money to fund Christian religious activities in the program. The Bush administration has increased funding for abstinence education, emphasizing abstinence over condoms to stop the transmission of HIV and other diseases.

The silver ring movement began in 1994 through the Southern Baptist Convention's publishing house, Lifeway Christian Resources, in Nashville.

Its True Love Waits program has reached an estimated 3 million teens, said spokeswoman Kristi Cherry, and ring sales have grown by 10% to 15% over each of the past three years.

There's no standard silver ring. Some are engraved with Scripture or phrases such as "True Love Waits" or "Faith." Some are enhanced with a diamond or a cross.

They can be worn on any finger or even a thumb. Teens also can declare their intention via wrist bands, bracelets, pins, watches and T-shirts.

Jerry Rady, a jeweler in Escondido, Calif., made the first ring carved with "True Love Waits" in 1994, and he sells about 3,500 purity rings a year, accounting for nearly all his sales.

Rady's sterling silver rings sell for $35, while the solid gold versions are priced at $245. Sales are strongest in the Bible Belt states of Texas and Florida, he said.

Gina Layman, owner of Reger's Religious Bookstore in Toledo, had stopped selling the rings a few years ago because nobody wanted them, but she has brought them back.

"Now it's a cool thing," she said. "It's mostly the parents buying for their kids."

Chromik, an eighth-grader in Toledo, said the ring helps her remember her promise to God and her parents.

"Every time I'm with my boyfriend, I look at that ring and it just reminds me I'm going to be pure," she said.

[Dr. Shane]

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Abstinence programs are popular, but critics say they don't provide enough safe-sex info

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For the most part they don't. But that doesn't mean we throw out the baby with the bath water.

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Critics say the message is too focused on abstinence alone, which is hard to maintain and, if broken, can lead to unprotected sex and a higher risk of disease.

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Again some truth to that. Although programs I have been in are not just saying "don't do it." The programs I have been involved with teach the youth how to avoid temptation. Like not going on dates alone with their boyfriend or girlfriend but rather going on group dates with friends. And not being in each other's homes when their parents or roommates are not around. When we do not walk into the path of temptation, remaining pure isn't as hard as one might think.

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the abstinence-only groups teach young people that condoms fail more often than they really do.

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This too has been my experience. The abstinence groups I have been involved with have stressed a lot that condomns are not reliable. However if used correctly they are very reliable.

I gave a chastity ring to both of my sister-in-laws when they were teenagers. When the older one started getting serious with her boyfriend I sent her a little package of condomns too. I told her that I hoped she wouldn't use them until her honeymoon but if they didn't wait to make sure she protected herself. She assured me they would be waiting.

Birth control can be taught in conjuction with abstenance. Most married couples use birth control at sometime during their marriage. Christian educaters can teach it in such a context.