Members rudywoofs (Pam) Posted December 19, 2013 Members Posted December 19, 2013 :) source ...things said from the pulpit that need to be modified, erased or deleted. 1. This will be short. Whether an announcement or a devotional thought, this is hardly ever the case. “Short announcement” is an oxymoron. When someone shows up to your event/program/worship service asking if they “can make a short announcement” look at them, tell them to hold on for a minute and run away. You can always ask for forgiveness later. 2. In conclusion. Preaching a sermon is like flying a plane. The conclusion of the sermon is like landing a plane. You know what happens when you fly a plane in circles and do not land? It crashes and burns. Hence the smoke smell you perceive in your clothes after you preach. You know who you are. Land the plane! 3. As far as possible, kneel. This one I heard this week from a colleague at the Union, it’s one of his pet peeves with worship. He says: “I did not know you could go past the floor. What do you mean as far as possible?” 4. To make a long story short. Too late. Usually by the time that statement is made, the story is already long. This phrase is a cousin of #1 (see above). This is especially disturbing when it’s the fifth time you have heard that story. Spouses, I feel your pain. 5. Will the visitors please stand? You are the flowers of our church. This phrase contains three crucial mistakes. Visitors. A better word is guest. Stand. No one likes that. Proven by data, surveys, science. No one. Flowers: Imagine a church with members from Mexico (or any other country). This one guy shows up as a guest with the belt, the hat and the boots. A man’s man. A macho man. He was a recognized from the front. He was called a flower. He never returned. Quote Pam Meddle Not In the Affairs of Dragons; for You Are Crunchy and Taste Good with Ketchup. If we all sang the same note in the choir, there'd never be any harmony. Funny, isn't it, how we accept Grace for ourselves and demand justice for others?
Moderators Gerr Posted December 19, 2013 Moderators Posted December 19, 2013 Quote: 3. As far as possible, kneel. When somebody says that I feel like walking out the door into the foyer to pray. Quote
Administrators Gail Posted December 19, 2013 Administrators Posted December 19, 2013 Although we all can relate to the "guts" of the message, what I like best is how Pam has included a link to the source of the article. This is a great example of how to credit a quote. Thanks for this, Pam! Quote Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.
Moderators Bravus Posted December 19, 2013 Moderators Posted December 19, 2013 Avoiding casual slaps at particular groups is also important. Someone telling a kids' story just slipped in 'this was at a state school, so all the teachers left at 3 o'clock'. My daughter, who is a very dedicated state school teacher who usually gets booted out of the school when security locks up at 6 pm and then does more work at home, understandably didn't get a whole lot out of the rest of that church service. Quote Truth is important
Members phkrause Posted December 19, 2013 Members Posted December 19, 2013 LOL, I love them all. LOL Quote phkrause When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; But when a wicked man rules, the people groan. Proverbs 29;2
Members rudywoofs (Pam) Posted December 20, 2013 Author Members Posted December 20, 2013 Avoiding casual slaps at particular groups is also important. Someone telling a kids' story just slipped in 'this was at a state school, so all the teachers left at 3 o'clock'. My daughter, who is a very dedicated state school teacher who usually gets booted out of the school when security locks up at 6 pm and then does more work at home, understandably didn't get a whole lot out of the rest of that church service. that's one of the reasons it took so long for my father to become an Adventist... he was also a public school teacher, and some of the comments from church members about public schools were pretty mean-spirited. But then there were others who finally took the time and effort to learn the truth about his dedication to his students... and some even wrote supporting letters for his Oregon Teacher of the Year award. Quote Pam Meddle Not In the Affairs of Dragons; for You Are Crunchy and Taste Good with Ketchup. If we all sang the same note in the choir, there'd never be any harmony. Funny, isn't it, how we accept Grace for ourselves and demand justice for others?
pierrepaul Posted December 20, 2013 Posted December 20, 2013 About 20 years ago my then church of about 100 members got a new pastor. His first sermon contained a hypothetical dialog between a Christian and his antagonist. He chose to make the antagonist a lawyer (and there was no reason in the story to have attributed any particular profession to this character). We were an unusual congregation in that we had 3 lawyers and 2 law students in the church - at a time when being an SdA and a lawyer was still a novelty (and many back then thought it was a contradiction in terms). The new pastor had no idea.nnnn Fortunately we were all pretty thick skinned by then, as all of us had already been asked the question a hundred times "how can you be a Christian and a lawyer?" Quote God never said "Thou shalt not think".
Moderators Jeannieb43 Posted December 21, 2013 Moderators Posted December 21, 2013 "3. As far as possible, kneel." ...... Well, just wait till you've grown elderly, had two or three knee surgeries or spine surgeries.... THEN you'll understand that some in the congregation aren't physically ABLE to kneel. So I think that's a perfectly proper request to make. [usually when it's my turn to offer the pastoral prayer, I couch the request in somewhat softer terms: Insofar as is possible, let us kneel as we pray.] Quote Jeannie<br /><br /><br />...Change is inevitable; growth is optional....
Members phkrause Posted December 21, 2013 Members Posted December 21, 2013 "3. As far as possible, kneel." ...... Well, just wait till you've grown elderly, had two or three knee surgeries or spine surgeries.... THEN you'll understand that some in the congregation aren't physically ABLE to kneel. So I think that's a perfectly proper request to make. [usually when it's my turn to offer the pastoral prayer, I couch the request in somewhat softer terms: Insofar as is possible, let us kneel as we pray.] I definitely agree Jeannie, my Mom who has had a new knee since '04 can't kneel anymore. The Pastor or visiting preacher's all pretty much say the same thing. I think this is a legit saying, and very appropriate. I'd say that most if not all preachers just want to cover all the bases, if intentionally or not, we have no idea. Quote phkrause When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; But when a wicked man rules, the people groan. Proverbs 29;2
OzarkWoman Posted December 21, 2013 Posted December 21, 2013 "3. As far as possible, kneel." ...... Well, just wait till you've grown elderly, had two or three knee surgeries or spine surgeries.... THEN you'll understand that some in the congregation aren't physically ABLE to kneel. So I think that's a perfectly proper request to make. [usually when it's my turn to offer the pastoral prayer, I couch the request in somewhat softer terms: Insofar as is possible, let us kneel as we pray.] Quote
Members rudywoofs (Pam) Posted December 21, 2013 Author Members Posted December 21, 2013 I think the "as far as possible, kneel" comment was referring to the idea that it sounds as if there are "degrees" of kneeling, when in fact, you're either kneeling, or you're not... lol it's just a funny way of saying it. Jeannie's idea of "Insofar as is possible, let us kneel ..." is far better worded.. Quote Pam Meddle Not In the Affairs of Dragons; for You Are Crunchy and Taste Good with Ketchup. If we all sang the same note in the choir, there'd never be any harmony. Funny, isn't it, how we accept Grace for ourselves and demand justice for others?
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