Modems beat women

[Neil D]

Some reasons why a modem is better than a woman:

A modem doesn't ask for a commitment if you use it. Getting a modem to obey you is as simple as typing "AT".

When you're done using your modem, you can roll over and go to sleep without feeling guilty.

A modem won't say a word if you come home late.

A modem can't collect alimony if you decide to dump it.

A modem will always wait patiently by the phone.

You can always get a few bucks for an old modem when a faster model comes out.

A modem doesn't mind if you call another modem.

A virus you catch from your modem doesn't require a trip to the doctor.

You don't have to bring a modem home to meet your parents. If an error occurs, Abort, Retry or Fail are the only options you have to worry about.

Modems come with an instruction manual. Modems have a volume control - you can even turn the sound OFF.

[Ellen]

How do modems feel about highspeed, Neil?

[cricket]

Yes, there's always a newer, smarter, faster model that comes along.

[Beryl]

But fancy having to look at the same, unsmiling face that feels cold and unresponsive to the touch. Wouldn't you rather look at a face that changes expression? that you can tell what thoughts are happening? That allows you to even escape before it explodes?

Only a woman can do that!

Beryl

<img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/tongue1.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/laughhard.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/yucky.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/luxhello.gif" alt="" />

[Planey]

Quote:

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Beryl said:

But fancy having to look at the same, unsmiling face that feels cold and unresponsive to the touch.

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Are you refering to the woman or the modem?

Quote:

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that you can tell what thoughts are happening?

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And this is definitely a two-edged sword!

Graeme