Members rudywoofs (Pam) Posted July 15, 2015 Members Posted July 15, 2015 I've been meaning to start this topic for some time now... What is your criteria for accepting people? Honestly, what is it? (And please, don't just give the PC response of "I accept everyone just where they are, and how they are." Nobody does that 100% of the time.) There's a general inclination to accept those whose viewpoints and ideals are the same or similar to one's own. But what about those whose views differ, or they somehow step on toes, or they look or sound different? I've seen on various forums, including this one, where, if a new member posts something whiney and goes on and on about being mistreated in the church, or posts an idea or opinion in a way that might seem offensive, etc, one of two things happen. And a lot of it depends on whether that person has a friendship with someone here. If we *know* a new member personally, we give LOTS of slack, sympathy, etc. If we *don't* know someone, we label them, criticize and chastise them, and sometimes toss them out the door of our minds, or literally bounce them out the doors of the forum or the church. Is it always the right thing to "shake the dust" off our sandals and dismiss someone new whose presence we dislike on a forum or in church? (Of course, there are times when someone is so disruptive and/or is a "spammer" that they need to be booted in order to preserve the safety and well-being of the church or forum.) JoeMo, GayatfootofCross and Outta Here 3 Quote Pam Meddle Not In the Affairs of Dragons; for You Are Crunchy and Taste Good with Ketchup. If we all sang the same note in the choir, there'd never be any harmony. Funny, isn't it, how we accept Grace for ourselves and demand justice for others?
Outta Here Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 (edited) I accept people with an inviting, non-abrasive personality; and I dismiss those with a superiority complex--especially those who insist on correcting others, pointing out the errors of their ways, and ridiculing them for it. (And I should probably add--when I'm met with a person with characteristics of the latter, I'm likely to "answer" them in kind.) Edited July 15, 2015 by Aubrey Dr. Shane and Naomi 2 Quote
GayatfootofCross Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 I am glad JESUS accepts everyone! As we get closer to Jesus coming we will see that in His Children more and more. I can't wait! Outta Here and Gail 2 Quote For all Eternity God waited in anticipation for You to show up to give You a Message - YOUR INCLUDED !!! { a merry dance }?️? " If you tarry 'til you're better You will never come at all " .. "I Will Rise" by the late great saved Glen Campbell If your picture of God is starting to feel too good to be true, you're starting to move in the right direction. "My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite." Romeo and Juliet
JoeMo Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 (edited) In an ideal world, we should accept everyone. Sorry; I don't live in an ideal world. I "try" to like everyone; but I fail to like some people. This sounds shallow; but I generally accept people who accept me. I am very quirky; and some people can't deal with it. If they get to know me and CAN handle my eccentricity; I'm usually happy to accept them as well. I have a difficult time accepting people that have a need to "fix" me. I'm OK with folks telling me I'm full of a noxious brown substance, I know I am. I am willing to temprarily reign in certain objectionable aspects of my personality to fit in with certain groups (like church and work); but eventually the real me comes out - the Jesus-freak, potty-mouthed hippie with no filters who hangs out with the wrong crowd. It's one thing to give feedback to someone on things that push your buttons; it's an entirely different thing to insist that someone change for you so you don't have to change for them. I recently read a book called "True-Faced" by Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John Lynch. It's premise is that it's better to be yourself and absorb the collateral damage than to try to be who you think everyone wants you to be. (This includes our relationship with Christ) I try to follow that philosophy. It has cost me some "friends" (were they really friends to begin with?). People can tell when you are putting on a front. I can usually tell if someone is putting on a front. One of the things that I find annoying (if not downright unacceptable) are most people (usually church folk) who claim that everything is OK and they are continuously blessed. Call me "jaded"; but everyone has issues. I am more accepting of people who are honest, and willing to talk about the issues in their lives and show an interest in my issues. I am less accepting of people who tell me how awesome their life is and how I would be so much "better" if I would live and think like them rather than like me - especially when they have some of the same issues that they are trying to change in me. I can usually tolerate weirdness and dysfunctionality from honest people. What I find hard to accept is weirdness and dysfunctionality from people who pretend that they are not weird or dysfunctional. I'd rather deal with a "real" dysfunctional person that an"fake" normal person (whatever normal is). Edited July 15, 2015 by JoeMo phkrause, GayatfootofCross and Gail 3 Quote
CoAspen Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 For me its honesty. Some of the people I enjoy being with the most have many differences. Some even non-christian! I trust them, what you see is what you get. I enjoy 'real people' the most, no matter what they believe or look like. Outta Here, Gail, GayatfootofCross and 2 others 5 Quote
LifeHiscost Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 I am glad JESUS accepts everyone! Could you supply a text from the Word that indicates there is no discrimination between those Jesus accepts? Thanks. God is Love! Jesus saves! Quote Lift Jesus up!!
Sojourner Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 What is your criteria for accepting people? Honestly, what is it? (And please, don't just give the PC response of "I accept everyone just where they are, and how they are." Nobody does that 100% of the time.) My criteria Rudy is more simply how I feel at the time. I make decisions based on feelings and some of my decision processes are perhaps irrational to other people but make perfect sense to me. What I will say is that you do not have to hold the same political views or theological views as me to be my friend. I can deal with not having to try and control people and surround myself with carbon copies of people that share my views on any given subject, i am okay to agree to disagree with people. Still there are people that I don't accept. People that are overbearing or who I feel are seeking to control me in some way usually get shown the door pretty quickly. I can handle the company of an Atheist if we agree to disagree, but I cannot handle the company of an Atheist who has to go on with it in a militant fashion after I have asked them to leave it be. I don't have a great deal of time for the 90+ % of people that are unable or unwilling to take responsability for their own actions, I let a friendship go after I got so tired of this person making stupid decisions and constantly whinging and blaming everyone else for what had happened to him. Interestingly, I learnt as a child that if my grandmothers Rottweiler / Shepherd cross did not like someone then I generally did not like them either and I hold by that today with my own dog. Not that it happens very often but if someone comes to my home and I get the sense that my dog dislikes this person and is pensive then I wont invite that person back. Perhaps it is irrational, but to me it makes perfect sense! rudywoofs (Pam) 1 Quote
GayatfootofCross Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 (edited) LifeHiscost..well sure! Oh dear, I must go back to my childhood when I first heard this scripture (among many). umm.. ok It is by memory so forgive me if its not word for word.. For God so loued þe world, that he gaue his only begotten Sonne: that whosoeuer beleeueth in him, should not perish, but haue euerlasting life. John 3:16 Forgive me for my old rusty English sounding so old and rusty English. other old English Scriptures will be provided upon more requests (others are welcomed to chime in) We might have to have a Holy Bible Study on this scandalous doctrine. #God is that inclusive, All people born in our world are accepted. We might have to have add this to the 28 Fundamental Beliefs. BTW I have said this before here..somewhere "God is much more inclusive than our Church." You can quote me. Always enjoy your posts. Edited July 16, 2015 by GayatfootofCross JoeMo 1 Quote For all Eternity God waited in anticipation for You to show up to give You a Message - YOUR INCLUDED !!! { a merry dance }?️? " If you tarry 'til you're better You will never come at all " .. "I Will Rise" by the late great saved Glen Campbell If your picture of God is starting to feel too good to be true, you're starting to move in the right direction. "My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite." Romeo and Juliet
GayatfootofCross Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 Could you supply a text from the Word that indicates there is no discrimination between those Jesus accepts? Thanks. God is Love! Jesus saves! Quote For all Eternity God waited in anticipation for You to show up to give You a Message - YOUR INCLUDED !!! { a merry dance }?️? " If you tarry 'til you're better You will never come at all " .. "I Will Rise" by the late great saved Glen Campbell If your picture of God is starting to feel too good to be true, you're starting to move in the right direction. "My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite." Romeo and Juliet
Dr. Shane Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 I find it easy to accept people who want to be friends and get along with others. I find it difficult to accept those that like to criticize and are generally negative people. phkrause and Outta Here 2 Quote Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com Author of Peculiar Christianity
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