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Emotionally connected


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Posted

I am currently reading a book that discusses EFT, or Emotionally Focused Therapy. I posted it in the Reading Pleasure forum for those who are interested.

The idea is that all of us, in order to be successful in life, need at least one person with which we are emotionally connected. The love of even just one other person lessens personal fear and enables us to tackle life's problems more efficiently.

I know I drone on here about the need to connect to God with our hearts, that THAT is where the kingdom of God's realm is. An intellectual understanding is not enough to bond.

Thoughts?

Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.

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Posted

It's an interesting therapy model: Suzie is studying counselling which means I'm helping with exam prep and reading over assignments and such in counselling, and I've heard of EFT that way. Suzie's main preferred models are solution focused therapy (SFT) and narrative, but she needs to build her repertoire and have as many tools as possible in the toolbox, and EFT is one of those.

I completely get this emotional connection with another human being, and have been blessed in it in my own life.

I have to admit that, for me, God hasn't fulfilled that role, but I'm sure that many others have different experiences, and I honour their experiences and the resulting beliefs.

Truth is important

Posted

Having been involved in 12-step groups for the past 30 years, I find it easy to accept the basic concept of EFT but would need to understand the details before endorsing it.

I think many intellectuals, like myself, struggle more with connecting to God on an emotional level.  There are times when I have been studying apologetics or ancient history that I have had a "God moment" when I felt a flash of "God is real" and a few times after the "flash" I have felt a warm feeling about God just I do for a close and personal friend.  The intellectual in me can explain these moments away in a rational way but not completely.   

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Posted
Quote

If you know your loved one is there and will come when you call, you are more confident of your worth, your value- Hold Me Tight, p.48

Basic but deep

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Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.

Posted

Gail,

Your quote is so true.  When that loved One who is always there when you call is your God and Savior who loves you with absolutely no strings attached; and has promised to be with you always - even to the end of the age, you will never be alone or without support.  I am confident of my savation because I know Jesus is there for me 24/7; not because I'm "good enough".

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Posted

It is astounding how much power there is in belief. Just the assurance of that (in the quote above) is a strong survival tool.

It is more than a survival tool, it gives us courage to venture out and to not fear the unknown.

Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.

Posted

I have to be careful not to become dependent on another human being for my self-worth.  When I was a child I was always afraid that one day I wouldn't have any friends.  But that day never came.  I am convinced that God works through people.  I do need people - no doubt - but God puts the people in my life that I need.  And God can use more than one person.  Thus I need to not become dependent upon a single individual because God may remove that person and replace him or her with someone else.

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Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com 

Author of  Peculiar Christianity

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Posted
On 12/29/2015 at 2:54 PM, Gail said:

I am currently reading a book that discusses EFT, or Emotionally Focused Therapy. I posted it in the Reading Pleasure forum for those who are interested.

The idea is that all of us, in order to be successful in life, need at least one person with which we are emotionally connected. The love of even just one other person lessens personal fear and enables us to tackle life's problems more efficiently.

I know I drone on here about the need to connect to God with our hearts, that THAT is where the kingdom of God's realm is. An intellectual understanding is not enough to bond.

Thoughts?

It seems to me that this is a "human thing," and not a spiritual thing? The problem I see, is, our human partners can easily be taken away! God is always gonna be there. If we don't have anyone anymore than who do we turn too? The way I see it, if we have God in our lives than we will always have someone. So when our spouse, children, grandkids, great grandkids, etc., are no longer there, we will have our heavenly father. So in that case we will always have that one person to turn to

phkrause

When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; But when a wicked man rules, the people groan. Proverbs 29;2
Posted

There are certain kinds of connections that are not God's job to provide. 

To be an agent of creation is to serve the Creator.

 

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Posted
3 hours ago, phkrause said:

It seems to me that this is a "human thing," and not a spiritual thing? The problem I see, is, our human partners can easily be taken away! God is always gonna be there. If we don't have anyone anymore than who do we turn too? The way I see it, if we have God in our lives than we will always have someone. So when our spouse, children, grandkids, great grandkids, etc., are no longer there, we will have our heavenly father. So in that case we will always have that one person to turn to

That's what I was thinking, too. This person counsels married couples, so there is someone available to be that emotionally tuned-in help. What does the solo-living person do to get that companion who will be willing to give you the feedback that is needed to be healthy?

Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.

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Posted
19 hours ago, Gail said:

That's what I was thinking, too. This person counsels married couples, so there is someone available to be that emotionally tuned-in help. What does the solo-living person do to get that companion who will be willing to give you the feedback that is needed to be healthy?

My Mom, after my Father died, was pretty much alone here in Florida. But her biggest thing that she could always count on was her church family. Lots of older adults go to nursing homes or assist living facilities, etc. Some love it, but I would say most don't last very long. Without the church and/or Jesus what do we really have?? Right now my Mom is 90, most if not all of her friends that she has made here have either died or are in nursing homes. She can't really go to church, but she does have 3ABN. Hope Channel, etc., and us. I see her on Monday nights to put out the garbage and recycle for the next day, so I see her for a few minutes. Then I come the next day to take the garbage can in and to take her to her doctors appointment, than home and bring in the recycle box. I see her for a few hours that day. Usually don't see her on Wednesday, but come on Thursday and do her shopping, see her for few minutes. Fridays again I don't see her and Sabbaths, maybe once in the month I get her and bring her to the house. But that's it, if not for her love of God, who would she have?? Its easy when we're young to have someone, but even than, how many really do? We have so many people committing suicide, because they have no one! Why is that? Because they have no personal relationship with God. I know that's a very simple answer, but I believe its the number one reason. Because after its all said and done who's left when our earthly ones are all gone? God, and that's only if have had a relationship with him throughout the years!

phkrause

When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; But when a wicked man rules, the people groan. Proverbs 29;2
Posted

..or what to do when the Church forbids that you can not emotionally connect with someone who you finally find connection with ...

 

:scared:

For all Eternity God waited in anticipation for  You  to show up to give You a Message - YOUR INCLUDED !!! { a merry dance }?️‍?

" If you tarry 'til you're better
You will never come at all "   .. "I Will Rise" by the late great saved  Glen Campbell

If your picture of God is starting to feel too good to be true, you're starting to move in the right direction. :candle:

 

"My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite."

Romeo and Juliet

 

Posted
On 12/31/2015 at 8:44 PM, Gail said:

That's what I was thinking, too. This person counsels married couples, so there is someone available to be that emotionally tuned-in help. What does the solo-living person do to get that companion who will be willing to give you the feedback that is needed to be healthy?

Beats me. All I can testify is that God has given me ten years of teaching me to sympathize with atheists. 

 

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To be an agent of creation is to serve the Creator.

 

Posted
2 hours ago, Geoarrge said:

 

Beats me. All I can testify is that God has given me ten years of teaching me to sympathize with atheists. 

 

Thank you for saying that Geoarrge! and Hello ..Happy New Year!

My brother is an atheist and it makes me sick... i want him to be Saved!

I found myself around atheists on the internet and I have been listening very closely and hardly peep at all.

Just empathizing and trying to see what they see.

I myself have always known in my very deep core there is a GOD since a child in a home where God was not talked about.

My brother did too once upon a time (when little).

Hanging around this group have made a big difference on how to understand and listen and love on my brother like never before.

I am grateful! I want him to be saved.

 

# my earliest memories of my life is my mom and him..we are 13 months apart!

 

For all Eternity God waited in anticipation for  You  to show up to give You a Message - YOUR INCLUDED !!! { a merry dance }?️‍?

" If you tarry 'til you're better
You will never come at all "   .. "I Will Rise" by the late great saved  Glen Campbell

If your picture of God is starting to feel too good to be true, you're starting to move in the right direction. :candle:

 

"My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite."

Romeo and Juliet

 

Posted
8 hours ago, phkrause said:

We have so many people committing suicide, because they have no one! Why is that? Because they have no personal relationship with God.

::like::

It's not the ones who are yoked to the Son of God who feel suicide is an option. Even those who may have lost a loved one wait only for Jesus to wake them out of sleep have their Savior by their side continually.

God is Love!~Jesus saves!  :grouphug::offtobed: Oh BTW, Happy New Year. At least as the 25th of December has roots in men' traditions instead of the Word, the new year is tied to God's eternal clock.

Lift Jesus up!!

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Posted

The rate of suicide among believers is, as I understand it, the same as among unbelievers.

Off to fact-check myself.

Truth is important

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Posted
17 hours ago, Bravus said:

The rate of suicide among believers is, as I understand it, the same as among unbelievers.

Off to fact-check myself.

No need to "fact check," pretty much have heard the same. Yes many lonely people out there, as you say, believers and non believers!!

phkrause

When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; But when a wicked man rules, the people groan. Proverbs 29;2
Posted

Suicide rate, unless it has changed recently, is higher on Protestants than Catholics.

HOWEVER a lot of pre-suicide folks, often will check out religion before they check out of life. so there could be some distorted research if it does not include that.

In developing countries, suicide is lower, something that really surprised me at the time.

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Posted

Even considering the assurance of eternal salvation, that doesn't necessarily help with living the life that we have to live right now, finding the means to keep ourselves going through the daily grind.

To be an agent of creation is to serve the Creator.

 

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Posted

In developing countries it could be that there is still more of a "village" mindset, more community spirit, than we have here in the West, say, in Europe or N. America.

Having freedom and wealth may mean less interdependence.

Isaiah 32:17 And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.

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