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New Drugs for Women in 2006


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Posted

ST. MOMMA'S WORT

Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconsious for up to two days.

EMPTYNESTROGEN

Eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers, and how you couldn't wait until they moved out.

PEPTOBIMBO

Liquid silicone drink for single women. 2 full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.

DUMBEROL

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.

FLIPITOR

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

BUYAGRA

Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and credit card limit of spending spree.

JACKASSPIRIN

Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.

ANTI-TALKSIDENTA

Spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

NAGAMENT

When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him.

DAMNITOL

Take 2 and ther rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

As with all drugs, please discuss frequency, use, and side effects with your pharmacist. Someone has to make their day!

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Posted

Quote:

DAMNITOL

Take 2 and ther rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.


Um....Where did you say you can get this, again?????

There are days when I think I could use it...and there are days when the whole ward could use a salt lick of this stuff...! smirk.gif

Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.

 

George Bernard Shaw

 

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