cricket Posted February 20, 2006 Posted February 20, 2006 As noted in this week's Sabbath School lesson, sex is an integral part of marriage. Although it was the topic of the week, it is not often discussed among Adventist circles. Would anyone here be interested in opening a private (for paying members only) forum in which these topics can be freely discussed? A place where sex related threads can be posted instead of in the general townhall forums?
LifeHiscost Posted February 20, 2006 Posted February 20, 2006 Quote: Cricket said: As noted in this week's Sabbath School lesson, sex is an integral part of marriage. Would anyone here be interested in opening a private (for paying members only) forum in which these topics can be freely discussed? A place where sex related threads can be posted instead of in the general townhall forums? Perhaps there could be a designated private forum for those who wish to resrict their views to a more private atmosphere as well as a public thread for the persons less inhibited. [:"red"] "But he who practices truth [who does what is right] comes out into the Light; so that his works may be plainly shown to be what they are--wrought with God [divinely prompted, done with God's help, in dependence upon Him]." [/] John 3:21 AMP brackets theirs LHC Lift Jesus up!!
Moderators Bravus Posted February 20, 2006 Moderators Posted February 20, 2006 I voted for a private forum (although one for the mature and appropriate discussion of married sex, not for smut, innuendo, erotica or pornography), based on some experience as a moderator. I take LHC's point above about doing what we do out in the light. At the same time, I know there are children who read here, and I know that some (perhaps particularly those who are single and struggling with that status) would prefer not to read about sex. I think the fact that fora are essentially free to create allows us to show appropriate respect for the needs, interests and sensibilities of as many people as possible by clearly labelling the cans they're wondering whether to open... Truth is important
Moderators Gregory Matthews Posted February 20, 2006 Moderators Posted February 20, 2006 There is a Federal (United States of America) law that requires websites that have sexually relatred content to restrict such access to people over a certain age. (I think it is 13, but may be wrong.) That law has specific requirements in regard to proof of age. The website is subject of libality if the provisions of that law are violated. We may want to be careful. Gregory
David_McQueen Posted February 20, 2006 Posted February 20, 2006 We already have such a zone. No? Duplicate! I thought there was an age restriction on here anyway, so as to protect minors from private messages, harrasment, etc. Hmmm..let me check Firstborn Ministries: Spoken and written word, without apology
Moderators Nan Posted February 20, 2006 Moderators Posted February 20, 2006 We already have the private men and women's forums. I claim no knowledge of the former, occasionally sexually related issues come up in the latter. Certainly such topics could be discussed there. The question becomes, do we want a place where input from 'them' and 'us' ( <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />) can occur?
Moderators Gerr Posted February 20, 2006 Moderators Posted February 20, 2006 I taught the lesson last Sabbath. Our class is made up of mostly senior citizens. I introduced the lesson thus: Our lesson this week is on sex. Who wants to talk about sex? One elderly lady said, "Turn the next page." Gerry
Dr. Shane Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 I guess it doesn't matter to me. Six one way and half a dozen the other. Sex has been around since the beginning of time and prostitution is said to be the world's oldest profesion so that would mean that Satan has been perverting God's gift of physical intimacy since the fall or soon after. It certainly isn't an issue the church can ignore. If such a forum was created I would have it available to paying members only like the Natters Matters forum. I wouldn't think it would need to be as exclusive as the men's or women's forum. It should, after all, edify the church. Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com Author of Peculiar Christianity
Stan Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 IF this is going to take place, it clearly can not be a public forum.... it would have to be for the interested and not the curious... Been on the road a lot, have not posted much sorry... If you receive benefit to being here please help out with expenses. https://www.paypal.me/clubadventist Administrator of a few websites like https://adventistdating.com
Dr. Shane Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 What would we be discussing? What comes to my mind is current events like studies and polls that are often reported in the news that are sex-related. Trends in society. Attitudes in the church. Biblical positions on various sex-related things. Objectionable movies or TV programs that have sexual content. Those of us that have been here a few years already know that there isn't much we haven't already discussed. I think such discussions have been positive overall. As we have new members join many of the topics we have already been over will be repeated. When we struggle with a sin, Satan wants us to feel isolated. When the church discusses temptations and struggles openly, members struggling with such issues know they are not alone and we take away one of Satan's tools from him. Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com Author of Peculiar Christianity
Neil D Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Last Sabbath, I heard a sermon on the Song of Solomon...I can count on ONE hand the number of times that a sermon was preached on that book, and usually the sermon has to mention the perverson of sex and how our culture has taken something so wonderful and perverted it. Well, I wonders.... I wonders in what way sex was perverted, and I wonders why adventists cant talk about this relationship without getting up tight. I wonders how come the subject MUST always mention how the world has perverted the subject of sex without ever describing the wonders of it.....Oh well...it's gonna take a person more silver tonged than I to break into the consciences of other and over whelm thier closed minds.....Not to say that my tongue is really as smooth as I let on.... Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw
Moderators Bravus Posted February 21, 2006 Moderators Posted February 21, 2006 It'd certainly be nice if we could talk about the positive side of things as well as the negative, and perhaps help one another out too... for example with strategies for dealing with siginifcantly different libidos in a marriage or whatever. We do tend to whip over to the condemnation side too quickly, alhtough of course there's space for that discussion too. God invented sex, Satan broke it (along with everything else), and there's room for living in the Kingdom of Heaven right here on earth as we strive to restore the image of God in ourselves and our relationships. Truth is important
LifeHiscost Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: Neil D said: I wonders how come the subject MUST always mention how the world has perverted the subject of sex without ever describing the wonders of it The two reasons I can see are the reality of how many otherwise bright and successful individuals have succumbed to their lack of self-control, ruining not only their own reputation, but often the lives and futures of others closely associated. I'm sure you're aware of many biblical examples. Then there are those who see within themselves temptations to which they wish not to subject themselves. [:"red"] "I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?" [/] Job 31:1 KJV Lift Jesus up!!
Norman Byers, N.D. Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Hi Cricket Personally I have no interest in discussing this topic because there are other areas in our experience that need to be addressed first. my 2 cents, Norman The unconditional pardon of sin never has been, and never will be. PP 522
Dr. Shane Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: I wonders how come the subject MUST always mention how the world has perverted the subject of sex Perhaps for the same reason hunting classes must address gun safety. Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com Author of Peculiar Christianity
Neil D Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: God invented sex, Satan broke it (along with everything else), and there's room for living in the Kingdom of Heaven right here on earth as we strive to restore the image of God in ourselves and our relationships. So, tell me.... Why is it that when one compares good vs evil, we find that good is definately the bigger subject....but evil, being the more dramatically smaller subject gets the larger ..Press...? IOWs, if sex is so good, and so large in it's subject, why is it concidered ....EVIL? ....Oh, I forgot...singles and children will go blind with the discussion of sex.... I ever brought this up... Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw
Moderators Bravus Posted February 21, 2006 Moderators Posted February 21, 2006 Worl... I guess one of the points is that it's easier to talk about all the bad sex stuff on TV in a venue like this than to talk about how great sex is and about all the great sex we're having and about how we learned to make our wife's {edited for your protection} <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> You get what I mean? Plus, 'sex is fun' is more of a 'dog bites man' than a 'man bitees dog' kind of story... Truth is important
Neil D Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: it's easier to talk about all the bad sex stuff on TV in a venue like this than to talk about how great sex is That's because to talk about sex is to talk about.....US! And it's concidered bad taste to model US and what we DO before our friends.....Heaven help our friends if they APPEAR shocked [ (whisper) yet secretly are turned on] by a discussion of SEX! Quote: about all the bad sex stuff on TV in a venue like this And yet, with all the pornography being sold, I am sure that there is enough for every man and woman in the US, if not North America....I know one thing...I don't have any porno films in my household...Dang! I am also reminded of a line from Shakespear, " He protesth too much", and I think of it every time a conservative loudly complaines about the porno industry. [Looking over at Shane]..So, Bravus, knowing your 'conservative ways', I notice that you are NOT complaining about it. So, I must conclude that you probably have some ... /tic Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw
Moderators Bravus Posted February 21, 2006 Moderators Posted February 21, 2006 Hehe - both a logical flaw and a category error there, my brother... <img src="/ubbtreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Truth is important
Neil D Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: Bravus said: Hehe - both a logical flaw and a category error there, my brother... Of which, I am famous for..... Nevertheless, the point may be obscured if I don't reinterate it.... Sex is about US... And intimate relationships are too sacred to be shared and yet, are so desparately wanted that we will do anything to appease the hole left in us. Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw
Morning Glory Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Just tagging on here....... I think that it is a bit difficult to discuss things of such a personal matter. And, that not only includes sex, but our personal feelings on a lot of topics. I find it a bit difficult to get my DH to discuss love.....he usually tolerates my talk for a few, short min before he will say something to the effect of, well, that's enough mushy stuff. I think that it harkens back to childhood when we were only too happy to tell mommy and daddy everything and got reprimended for saying too much......and we internalized that to be not to say anything about how we FEEL. Pretty much ever. Except during courtship when we said just enough to get us married, if that be the case. But, the bigger question and problem for anyone in a long term relationship is how to break down those barriers and begin to be comfortable in using words to express how we feel. I think that relates back to our relationship to God, also. If we aren't even comfortable in expressing, verbally, our love for our spouse, how are we to express our love for the Lord?? I am no phychologist, so don't have the answers, but these are some of the things that come to mind here for me. Perhaps someone who is trained in that venue would have something helpful to add to this discussion. Kindness is the oil that takes the friction out of life.
Dr. Shane Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: I am also reminded of a line from Shakespear, " He protesth too much", and I think of it every time a conservative loudly complaines about the porno industry. [Looking over at Shane].. I don't think the porno industry is as dangerous as network and cable TV. At least if a person sees a porno magazine or video he or she knows what it is and what it contains. Turning on the TV has become like walking through a mine field. It is the "soft porn" (sexual content without nudity) that passes as mainstream entertainment that I think is most dangerous. Pastoral Family Counselor... Find me at www.PostumCafe.com Author of Peculiar Christianity
bevin Posted February 21, 2006 Posted February 21, 2006 Quote: we will do anything to appease the hole left in us. Freudian slip right there... and a very true statement I have been amazed at the conversations I have overheard at the hospitals and ambulance services where I have been hanging out - I can assure you that the inhibitions of this group are not shared by all members of the USA society /Bevin
Recommended Posts