The Blonde Cookbook

[SMAN]

MONDAY:

It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

TUESDAY:

Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper.

<img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/mittelgr124.gif" alt="" />

WEDNESDAY:

A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can't say it improved the rice any.

THURSDAY:

Today Tom asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients, lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden.

FRIDAY:

I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe.

When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

SATURDAY:

Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday (oh boy). For some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.

<img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/AAdoh.gif" alt="" />

SUNDAY:

Tom's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY.

This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with chocolate moose.

<img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/i.p.emrose.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/i.p.emrose.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/i.p.emrose.gif" alt="" />

[cricket]

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Enough with the blonde jokes. Stop it already!

[Nan]

Wonder who is blonde in here?

I am sort of .... so I can post this

Do you know why the blonde was so pleased with herself for finishing the jigsaw puzzle in 6 months?

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Because on the box it said "3 - 5 years"

[cricket]

I'm not a blonde. Nor do I pretend to be one.

I'm just sick of the jokes that poke fun at one (or more) type(s) of person(s).

[Gail]

Well, I'm blonde and I like them, although they do get somewhat predictable <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

But I hear ya

[cricket]

Predictable, yes, because they are sooooo very old. They've been around for ages.

Even so, it doesn't make them right.

[aldona]

I'm proud to be a Natural Blonde - and my first attempts at cooking were sort of similar...

My first attempt at Gluten Steaks congealed into a rubbery mass about the size of a football, sank to the bottom of the broth, stuck to the saucepan and burned. I buried it in the garden. If I was to go back to the old house where we lived just after we got married, it would probably still be there...because not even the soil microbes are brave enough to digest it...

aldona

[LifeHiscost]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">Quote:</font><hr />

Grasshopper said:

I'm not a blonde. Nor do I pretend to be one.

I'm just sick of the jokes that poke fun at one (or more) type(s) of person(s).

<hr /></blockquote><font class="post">

Just want you to know, grasshopper, that not all men believe blondes to be a "type" of person. We are all individuals, and if a type, wouldn't humanbeing be the type.

A sense of humor and no ego helps to roll with the flow. Besides that, the jokes may be because of jealousy since the jokesters may know that blondes have more fun. <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/i.p.emrose.gif" alt="" />

Cheers! <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

[Nan]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">Quote:</font><hr />

aldona said:

I'm proud to be a Natural Blonde - and my first attempts at cooking were sort of similar...

My first attempt at Gluten Steaks congealed into a rubbery mass about the size of a football, sank to the bottom of the broth, stuck to the saucepan and burned. I buried it in the garden. If I was to go back to the old house where we lived just after we got married, it would probably still be there...because not even the soil microbes are brave enough to digest it...

aldona

<hr /></blockquote><font class="post">

One of my more 'blonde' moments was cooking the gluten in the microwave. Definitely not recommended. <img src="/adventist/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

[Ellen]

I think everybody's Dumbfounded

[Dr. Shane]

A joke is a joke when everyone knows it is. Among adults I don't have a problem with such things but among kids it can be cruel. I don't like super long words that mess up the forum. :(

[cricket]

Here's a short one: argh! Here's two longer ones: paradigmatic conditioning.

[Nan]

Is paradigmatic conditioning undertaken to avert cognitive dissonance?

[cricket]

Only step out of my sunlight.

[Neil D]

Only step out of my sunlight.

Uh, excuse me, but is this a joke??? If so, I don't understand it...

Infact, if it isn't a joke, I still don't understand it....

Some enlighten me....explain this phrase as I keep seeing it from time to time...

[rudywoofs (Pam)]

Neil, it is a phrase attributed to Diogenes, the ancient Greek seeker of an honest man. Some say it was a rude social statement to Alexander the Great. I have never seen the phrase used either as a joke or as a polite comment in literature...but perhaps it is there...somewhere.

[Nicodema]

Is paradigmatic conditioning undertaken to avert cognitive dissonance?

Nay. Paradigmatic conditioning tends to precipitate cognitive dissonance -- depending upon the paradigm of course. Breaking paradigmatic conditioning is part of the healing process, of breaking out of paradigm filters and into pure, raw experiential reality.