Students 'Humiliated' By Dress Code Enforcement

[bonnie]

Students 'Humiliated' By Dress Code Enforcement

Aug 25th 2014 9:46AM 986 Comments

NOBLE, Okla. –- A group of Noble High School girls were left crying and humiliated after they claim they were called out in front of the entire school for what they were wearing.

KFOR reports: Parents and students are both furious at the way inappropriate outfits were addressed on the first day of school.

Superintendent Ronda Bass says, "As I was greeting the children coming in I knew we had a major, major problem on our hands."

On the first day of school, Bass was one the first to welcome students back.

Bass says, "I am very proud to be known as 'Mama Bear Bass'.

Bass says she's very protective of her students and after she saw what some of the girls were wearing she decided to sit them down at the end of the day.

"The first question I asked was how many of you in here believe that there are female students on the campus today that are dressed completely inappropriate," says Bass. "Most of their hands went up."

That's not what senior Stephanie Stewart remembers, though.

Stewart says, "The first sentence was, 'Have y'all ever seen any 'skanks' around this school.' Around the end she said, 'I don't want to see anyone's ass hanging out of their shorts.'"

We asked Bass if those words were ever used.

"I knew that students from other towns were calling our girls really negative names. The message I wanted to send to them was I don't want them to be called those names," says Bass. "I want us to be known as the classy lady Bears."

This morning Bass followed up, unannounced.

According to Stephanie, she asked just the girls to stand up while she did a dress code check, even asking some of the girls to bend over.

Stephanie was singled out because in Bass' opinion her dress was too short.

Bass says, "If you're not comfortable with bending over, we might have a problem."

Stephanie says her superintendent handled the situation inappropriately, sending some of her friends home crying on the first week of school.

"A lot of girls actually felt humiliated," says Stewart. "You could see it in their faces that they were."

Bass said that she thought the problem was so widespread, she sent an email to teachers saying, "Our female students are pushing the limits. We all know this to be true... please help us stay on top of this until a new norm of modesty is established."

Bass says that she stands by the way she addressed the students and believes she did the right thing.

[rudywoofs (Pam)]

Here's some background on the superintendent: source

"Ronda Bass is a Veteran of the United States Air Force where she specialized in Signals Intelligence and Morse Code Interception during the Persian Gulf War. After leaving the military, she was a high school English teacher in both North Carolina and Oklahoma. Bass earned National Board Certification as a classroom teacher and was a Master Teacher for the state of Oklahoma. Prior to becoming Noble’s Assistant Superintendent five years ago, she was the Director of Resident Teachers and Professional Development for the Oklahoma State Department of Education. She is originally from Minco, Oklahoma. Bass is Noble’s 29th Superintendent of Schools and the first female to hold that position. She looks forward to helping the district continue the momentum that has been building for the past several years. She also loves living in Noble and being a part of its growing community."

I'm not sure I would have embarrassed the girls by having them "bend over" and doing it in front of others... there are many "modest" dresses which, if a person bends over at the waist, would certainly "ride up" in the back. There *are* ways of bending and reaching down for something without flashing the rear-end.

And certainly, if Ms Bass called the girls names, that was very inappropriate...

[Gail]

There is nothing like humiliation to ensure a certain behaviour never happens again... plus ensure a good chance that some of those humiliated ones will need therapy later on

[bonnie]

There is nothing like humiliation to ensure a certain behaviour never happens again... plus ensure a good chance that some of those humiliated ones will need therapy later on

If children need therapy it usually isn't going to be from one incident in their lives. It may be because parents are no longer responsible for their children's behavior and have objections to how the school does the job they should be doing.

There are consequences good or bad to personal behavior,even for children.

Shame or personal humiliation for a behavior a person,child or not,chooses is not always to be avoided.

Whether the actions of this administrator is acceptable or not, first and foremost as a parent my humiliation would be in the behavior of my child that led to this and my lack that I let it get to this point.

If as a parent you don't like the rules of a school,choose another that caters to what you wish. If you don't care what message your teenage daughter is sending,enroll her where scantily clad is the norm and acceptable.

[debbym]

there should have been a dress code provided to the parents to enforce on their kids.

from what i have experienced with school, the parents are the first line of discipline for dress issues.

this military style of discipline doesn't seem necessary to me.

[bonnie]

there should have been a dress code provided to the parents to enforce on their kids.

from what i have experienced with school, the parents are the first line of discipline for dress issues.

this military style of discipline doesn't seem necessary to me.

Do parents need a dress code to know that their teenage daughters

should not be going to school "scantily clad"".I raised my nieces along with four sons. I can look back and remember times I dropped the ball. But my sons would not have been going to school

with their underwear showing or green and pink hair in spikes.Neither would my nieces be going to school showing off as much of their "wares" as possible without being naked.The school would not have to tell me that was inappropriate.

There isn't a lot of background given as to what had gone before.It appears that the parents were not the first line of discipline for dress issues.

It is very possible this was seen as a last resort.

Apparently neither the students or parents felt any humiliation at being seen that way in public,the humiliation only kicks in

when called on it.

I would rather have seen the parents called in and told that the manner of dress in their children is inappropriate and to take them home and fix it,otherwise don't come back

[bonnie]

Yesterday,while waiting in the return line at Wal_Mart there was a young girl,maybe ten years old. I had a very hard time not telling her mother what I thought of the position she was

placing her young daughter in. She was wearing a very skimpy midriff top completely unsuitable for this young girl,complete with peek holes and black lace. Her "shorts" were very close to bikini panties. This little girl was aware enough to "strut" her stuff. This mother needed to be humiliated for what she was doing and teaching her innocent young daughter.

Yet any young man, expressing an interest in what appeared to be what her daughter was offering, would have been met with a scathing rebuke for being a pervert. The message to an actual pervert would have been she was there for the taking

[debbym]

The dress code is a point of reference for the school to address the problems as they arise.

Yes many teens dress and head for school without their parents knowing how they are dressed.

Often parents leave early for work for commutes. Teens are left much more to their own cognizance then elementary school kids. There are probably hundreds of scenarios why parents may or may not be giving guidance to their teen girls on dress. It is not complicated and not a new issue.

[bonnie]

The dress code is a point of reference for the school to address the problems as they arise.

Yes many teens dress and head for school without their parents knowing how they are dressed.

Often parents leave early for work for commutes. Teens are left much more to their own cognizance then elementary school kids. There are probably hundreds of scenarios why parents may or may not be giving guidance to their teen girls on dress. It is not complicated and not a new issue.

No it isn't complicated. Whether they are present when the child leaves for school or not,there is a consistent lack of parental control when a child routinely defies their parents wishes.

Usually the parent is responsible for buying their clothing. Don''t their parents ever go into their rooms?

Since our boys are grown we are still finding out some things they tried when we weren't home.It is interesting to hear now that it wasn't worth it to them to worry about us finding out.

It was not a consistent pattern of defiance. They knew most things we would eventually find out and the consequences would not be fun.

If this is true....from what i have experienced with school, the parents are the first line of discipline for dress issues. The parents are not doing their job.

My kids would not have been nearly concerned about being humiliated at school as they would their dad and I being notified.If they had been able to keep it quiet they would have. I would have been praying my parents never found out what I had done

The parents seem a lot more concerned about their child being humiliated than what the child did to create the circumstances.

[rudywoofs (Pam)]

I'm reminded of my own experience, where *my* mother was the most conservative mother of all my friends' mothers...to my utter disgust at the time. I had to wear skirts that came below my knees (while everyone else's hems were above-the-knee and some to mid-thigh).

So....sure....when I left for school, I looked to be total modesty personified. However, by the time the bus got to school, my skirt was as short as everyone else's, and I entered the school sporting a 2-inch roll of fabric around my waist. (And in the girls' restroom were a bevy of my friends putting on their make-up.)

It wasn't too long ago when I told my mom what I'd done those many years ago. She looked at me and said, "you think your generation was the only one to ever do that??" Turned out, she and her sisters had done the very same thing back in the 1930's.

LOL

my point is that parents then and now do not necessarily have control over the appearance their children, especially a teen girl.

[bonnie]

I'm reminded of my own experience, where *my* mother was the most conservative mother of all my friends' mothers...to my utter disgust at the time. I had to wear skirts that came below my knees (while everyone else's hems were above-the-knee and some to mid-thigh).

So....sure....when I left for school, I looked to be total modesty personified. However, by the time the bus got to school, my skirt was as short as everyone else's, and I entered the school sporting a 2-inch roll of fabric around my waist. (And in the girls' restroom were a bevy of my friends putting on their make-up.)

It wasn't too long ago when I told my mom what I'd done those many years ago. She looked at me and said, "you think your generation was the only one to ever do that??" Turned out, she and her sisters had done the very same thing back in the 1930's.

LOL

my point is that parents then and now do not necessarily have control over the appearance their children, especially a teen girl.

I don't think there is a kid alive that hasn't done things their parents would disapprove of.

When that behavior reaches a point of "typical behavior" the parent either can't or won't control maybe the school should not be blamed when it takes over your role.

Personally I would have been first in the line of fire had this been me when my parents found out. So would my kids. Unless my kids had been unfairly treated or harmed,my ire would not have been at that school. If they knew the rules of our house,school or not,and chose to defy them,tough. Their public humiliation would have been a small price to pay for a deliberate act of defiance

[CoAspen]

Ya, I remember my sister doing the same thing!!

Kids will always want to express them selves, inch right up to the line, push the boundaries, etc, part of growing up and learning. Life is complicated, that is reality.

Parents aren't always to blame, neither are schools always to blame.

Life presents many opportunities to teach and learn.

[bonnie]

Life presents many opportunities to teach and learn.

And this story might be one of them.It might not meet with everyone's approval.

Just curious,What does 'Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it"

[rudywoofs (Pam)]

Just curious,What does 'Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it"

sometimes that text is used as a whipping post for parents whose children deviate from the prescribed norms of the church..

I may be totally off base, but I like to think of that quote as giving those parents hope that their wayward offspring will return to the Father at some point in the future..

[bonnie]

sometimes that text is used as a whipping post for parents whose children deviate from the prescribed norms of the church..

I may be totally off base, but I like to think of that quote as giving those parents hope that their wayward offspring will return to the Father at some point in the future..

It was not a whipping post.Simply a question out of curiosity

how others see it.

[rudywoofs (Pam)]

I didn't state you were using the quote as a whipping post... (and I didn't think you were)

I was simply stating that some *do* use it as such...

[joeb]

Originally Posted By: rudywoofs

sometimes that text is used as a whipping post for parents whose children deviate from the prescribed norms of the church..

I may be totally off base, but I like to think of that quote as giving those parents hope that their wayward offspring will return to the Father at some point in the future..

It was not a whipping post.Simply a question out of curiosity

how others see it.

I see this text as very true. We don't forget what we are taught at a young age. The values instilled then in our lives are the basis for how we will live later on, and to change at that later time is very difficult.

The problem is that many parents teach their kids far different lessons than they think they are. I know I learned things from my parents that they would have denied ever teaching, but that was because I learned from observing their behavior not from what they had to say.

Had my parents taught me about the love of God, respect for my rights and the rights of others, etc... by living their lives by those principles my life would have been a lot different than it actually was. I think this is true for most of us as we learn about the hypocrisy of our parents and then reject the rules they try to enforce upon us because we see the hypocrisy.

This is the major problem in the lives of kids. They don't have the really good values in their lives that would protect them from the bad stuff in life and from the peer pressure to do the wrong things because the adults around them indulge in hypocrisy on a daily basis so they see nothing wrong with claiming to be one way and living another way. That's why the commandments tell us that the iniquities of the father's are replicated in the children unto the third and fourth generations.

[CoAspen]

Quote:

...giving those parents hope that their wayward offspring will return to the Father at some point in the future..

Yes, perspective, perspective!!

Maybe it is not turning away from God, but simply making personal choices. We all make them, often times people want their own perspective/view point to be the one that is followed/correct.

We are all wayward from God, but He is still there for us. I have no trouble,as a parent, thinking and feeling the same way. I think we can spend more time looking for the good, rather than the bad of our own definition. Again, many opportunities for teaching!!!!

[bonnie]

Yes, perspective, perspective!!

Maybe it is not turning away from God, but simply making personal choices. We all make them, often times people want their own perspective/view point to be the one that is followed/correct.

We are all wayward from God, but He is still there for us. I have no trouble,as a parent, thinking and feeling the same way. I think we can spend more time looking for the good, rather than the bad of our own definition. Again, many opportunities for teaching!!!!

I am not mocking your post but when you say....Yes, perspective, perspective!! on that day we all called to account will it be sufficient to say "Lord,it is all a matter of perspective" for our failures?

As a parent,along with looking for the good in my sons should I be ignoring what I feel is bad for them?

[Tom Wetmore]

I think perspective includes keeping the "bad" in perspective. The problem too often is that so many of these things, such as dress code violations get blown way out of perspective. As a parent or a teacher, one has to consider is whether this is a hill worth dying on. Too often these things escalate because nobody is willing to regain perspective that the issue may not merit a strong heavy handed approach since it really isn't a life or death situation. You have frequently posted outrageous situations where the punishment/discipline clearly did not fit the "crime". For example, a kid getting suspended from school with a zero tolerance of drugs policy. The violation - kid has Tylenol in her backpack. In a more extreme example - police using excessive force resulting in the needless death or injury of a person. Failures of perspective.

On the parenting end of this, do I make a huge issue if my kid decides to shave his head leaving a mohawk that he spikes up and dyes green? Perspective says that even though I think it looks foolish, makes him look like a juvenile delinquent, or whatever, it does not endanger his life or well-being, the hair will grow back and life will go on without much of an ill effect. But if I decide to make an example of decorum and good taste a grooming and publicly berate him and forceably shave that spiky nonsense off his head, the emotional impact will last him far longer than it would take for the hair to grow back. A failure of perspective.

[bonnie]

I think perspective includes keeping the "bad" in perspective. The problem too often is that so many of these things, such as dress code violations get blown way out of perspective. As a parent or a teacher, one has to consider is whether this is a hill worth dying on. Too often these things escalate because nobody is willing to regain perspective that the issue may not merit a strong heavy handed approach since it really isn't a life or death situation. Failures of perspective.

On the parenting end of this, do I make a huge issue if my kid decides to shave his head leaving a mohawk that he spikes up and dyes green? Perspective says that even though I think it looks foolish, makes him look like a juvenile delinquent, or whatever, it does not endanger his life or well-being, the hair will grow back and life will go on without much of an ill effect. But if I decide to make an example of decorum and good taste a grooming and publicly berate him and forceably shave that spiky nonsense off his head, the emotional impact will last him far longer than it would take for the hair to grow back. A failure of perspective.

The parenting end is something we see differently obviously.

This would not have gotten to the point of publicly berating our sons.They would have known before shaving their head into a mohawk with green spikes that would not fly in our house.In the event they did it anyway,knowing it was against school policy(it would not have gone over well at boarding academy)they lost their right to complain about the actions of the school.As a parent my humiliation would have come from allowing and backing our sons to defy rules because they felt entitled for some reason. Fair or not the first impression you leave people with is often the only one.I would not want my sons looking like or giving the impression of a juvenile delinquent.

If I had been unable or unwilling to control the style of dress for my nieces or granddaughters in my care and allowed them to attend school scantily dressed ,I really have lost the right to claim to be offended when the school assumes my role.

[bonnie]

While it may or may not improve academic performance

it does appear from this and many other articles that it does influence behavior.

http://quickbase.intuit.com/blog/2012/05/23/dress-code-or-not-what-you-wear-matters/

Does the Way Your Kids Dress Affect How They Do in School?

by Beth Greenwood, Demand Media

Some people believe uniforms improve academic performance.

What kids wear to school is a source of angst for many parents and teachers. Revealing attire, low-riding jeans and T-shirts with slogans are often the choice for teens and even preteens, while schools try to enforce dress codes or even mandate school uniforms. Evidence as to whether a strict dress code that mandates school uniforms can affect grades, however, is mixed.

School uniforms have some distinct benefits, according to a November 2009 article in the “Pacific Standard” magazine. Uniforms decrease gang aggression, as all students are wearing the same styles and colors. For the same reason, the issue of students using clothing as a status symbol is less of a problem, and the uniforms foster a more business-like approach to academics. Trespassers on the school grounds are easily identified, and the uniforms have helped foster community identity and school spirit.

Dress Codes

Schools that adopt uniforms typically mandate styles and colors. Dress codes, on the other hand, are more likely to ban certain styles of clothing without dictating that students wear a particular color or style. One of the main reasons to implement dress codes, according to a November 2007 article in the "Fresno Pacific University News," is safety. The article notes that dress codes can reduce crime and make it less likely that students will bring weapons to school.

Effects of Uniforms

A study by the University of Houston, "Dressed for Success: Do School Uniforms Improve Student Behavior, Attendance and Achievement?" suggests that school uniforms can have an impact on students’ grades, attendance and behavior. The study authors reviewed data from 160 schools in a large urban district. Although the biggest improvement was among female students, benefits were apparent for both genders in middle and high schools. Girls missed one day less of class in the school year and the schools were more likely to retain female students at all grade levels.

Uniforms and Academic Performance

In Long Beach Unified School district, one of the first to mandate uniforms, school crime decreased 36 percent, student fights dropped 51 percent and sexual offenses decreased 74 percent, according to “Pacific Standard.” Research is mixed, however, on whether uniforms improve academic performance, according to an article on the GreatSchools.org website. In one study at Youngstown University, the researchers found uniforms improved attendance and graduation rates while decreasing suspension rates. The study did not show any improvement in academic performance. In another study at the University of Missouri, there was no correlation between uniforms and academic prowess.

Data is Mixed

A study reported in the 2009 “Educational Policy” analyzed data from two other studies from the National Center for Educational Statistics. Reading scores for students in the eighth and 10th grades were higher in schools that mandated uniforms. In all other respects, uniformed students in one study performed worse than students who did not wear uniforms. In the second study, students from private schools that mandated uniforms scored poorly in math and reading compared to schools that did not require uniforms. In public schools, uniforms made no difference in mathematics achievement. Catholic schools that mandated uniforms had lower scores in reading, science and history than comparable schools that did not require uniforms.

[Tom Wetmore]

The parenting end is something we see differently obviously...

No great surprise there, of course. My embarrassment at how my kids looked was something I could be adult about and get over more easily than a kid can get over the embarrassment of public humiliation of being branded a rebel, or a bad kid, or trouble maker or whatever, over their fashion choices. That is no exaggeration since that is exactly what had happened to me growing up.

The hair issue is something for which I learned long ago that it is not a hill worth dying on. Since I grew up in the era of long hair for guys being the cool thing, it was a perpetual issue, first with my own father, then in academy. I at least came to understand my father's perspective since he grew up dirt poor in the depression when affording a haircut from a real barber was a luxury. Longer hair, shaggy hair, or amateur haircuts were outward evidence of being poor or a country hick. So at least I understood my Dad wanted us to have neatly clipped hair by a barber. But I still wanted my hair longer because it was cool in those days.

Then academy with its seemingly arbitrary rule of hair length meant I was regularly afoul of those rules since my hair seems to quickly grow beyond the prescribed length. The principal once told me to my face that I would be a better person if I got a haircut. Not that I would look better, but that I would be a better person. In case I didn't quite understand he explained himself by saying that in his experience it was the long haired boys that got in trouble and the short haired ones were better behaved and didn't get in trouble. My thought was that was only because he was only watching us long haired guys and ignoring the guys I knew with short hair that were drinking and smoking and chasing girls up in the woods, among other things. Real character shaping stuff, wasn't it? And then there was the rule against blue jeans...

The first thing I did when I graduated was let my hair and beard grow all summer. But you know what I did when I got my first job in food service when I went to college? I got a short haircut and shaved my beard because I was met with a rule that made sense. Nobody wants hair in the food. Get a haircut and shave or wear hairnets on my head and beard. A haircut and shave made sense then.

After the foolishness I experienced over hair while growing up, I determined that if my own sons wanted to do goofy hair stuff, I wouldn't worry about it. They grew out of weird hair stuff and both of them as men now keep their hair neat and trim. And they don't have ugly memories of fighting over hair issues growing up. There are just too many other more important things to worry about. Perspective.

[Liz]

Love love love this!!!!

(From a homeschooling mom of a blue haired child--because she donated her hair 16" worth to Locks of Love)

[bonnie]

No great surprise there, of course. My embarrassment at how my kids looked was something I could be adult about and get over more easily than a kid can get over the embarrassment of public humiliation of being branded a rebel, or a bad kid, or trouble maker or whatever, over their fashion choices. That is no exaggeration since that is exactly what had happened to me growing up.