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Often times in a personal relationship, whether it is a significant other or marital, one partner can become verbally abusive. It can also originate from critical thinking parents or siblings. After days, weeks, months or years of being told that you are stupid, fat, lazy, etc. one begins to buy into a negative view of ones self. Therefore, distorted thinking ensues.

If every person was "justified" when Christ died, with every sin (committed in the past) "forgiven" - then how could ANY from the Old Testament period be LOST??? But we know that many will be LOST. They will "not enter His rest". They sinned knowingly, and rebelliously, without remorse or repentance. These people do NOT stand "justified" before God, in the Books of Heaven. They do NOT stand forgiven. Christ's death does NOT COVER known, rebellious, sin and unrepentant sinners. The Old Testament is full of stories describing such persons. King Saul, for instance - will NOT stand justified before God. I do believe that Christ's death covered all "unknown" sin. Those who sin ignorantly - are covered, until such time that they come to HEAR the Law of God, and the Gospel of Christ. I do believe that Christ's death has "justified" all of those who brought "sin offerings" with humble, contrite, repentant hearts. These were "justified by faith". Christ's death resulted in "justification of life FOR all men". Justification became available - NOT a done deal for every man who ever existed.

I agree that folks "learn" to view themselves thru the eyes of significant others. They incorporate "distorted" messages, into their understanding of SELF. When someone suffers abuse from others, or from parents during childhood - those "messages" stay with them for life - unless loving supportive persons begin to speak other "messages" of love and value. Unfortunately, the Bible can be used to speak messages of condemnation, as well as messages of love, and worth, and acceptance. I have a friend whose mother was bi-polar. She could do the same thing on Monday, and her mom would think it cute. On Friday, she would think it boring. And by Sunday, mom would punish her for the same thing she did on Monday. How is this child supposed to develop a healthy self-image. She wouldn't know whether she was good, or bad, or boring. Noone yet has mentioned how the constant messages of DEMONS - spoken into an already sensitive mind, can cement thoughts and feelings of poor self-worth. DEMONS magnify the distorted views which we take in from others. When we pray for someone, we MUST specifically pray for their protection from DEMONS.

I like the vibe of this post. It does take a special church to foster openness. Many people get into distorted thought patterns because they feel that they can't "talk to people about their issues. We wear masks - especially at church - to hide our true selves and our issues and trials. Some of us tend to show others how much we are pleasing God rather than showing them how much we need and rely on God's grace. We strive so hard to overcome our sins on our own; while hiding our issues from our brothers and sisters. This results in many feeling guilty for not overcoming sin and like hypocrites for hiding our sin. We need to work on our sins together with God and our fellow believers. Here's some indications of how "comfortable" people are in your congregation with trusting others with their sin problems: If your church started an AA 12-step program (either for alcohol or drugs), how many church members would attend? If your church started a ministry for LGBTs, how many from church would even support it, much less participate? If your church started a group for couples having marital problems, how many people would attend? If your church has over 150 people, chances are there are people in the congregation that need these things. Is there grace enough in your church to openly accept people with these issues to correct their distorted thoughts about being losers, and sinners; and that God couldn't possibly love a jerk like him/her? We're studying a book called "True-Faced" by Bill Thrall and others that addresses how to trust God and your peers with who you really are rather than your distorted view of how you think you should be. Good read; and valuable for those who worry about distorted thinking about themselves and/or who God thinks they are.

Proverbs 24:9 The thinking of foolishness is sin, and the scorner is an abomination to men.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Lots of wisdom here! Distorted thinking seems to develop with the right combination of personal and external feedback.

One of the big ways to help distorted thinking is being transparent and connected to community. A place where many people can come together and reason and find wisdom in counsel of many. Church is one such Community! God really does know what is best for us. Problem is safety and trust has to be put in place first. O the risk to be vulnerable and to find like minded individuals to be authentic with!

one way is bad "self-talk" -- say someone makes a neutral or slightly negative comment about one's looks or one's pet idea. Distorted thinking could begin if the target person starts thinking that *everyone* has those opinions, and s/he then begins to obsess about it, and perhaps a downward spiral of self-worth begins. Or paranoid thinking begins ... e.g., someone is "picking on" him/her, when in actuality, nothing of the sort is happening.

“To be seventy years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be forty years old.” - Parker Schaeffer

“In the long run the pessimist may be proved right, but the optimist has a better time on the trip.” - Daniel L. Reardon

FEMESTER YES I will be praying for your operation and the doctors hands dgrimm60

“Silent presence is always better than silent absence.” - Chaplain Steve Thorny

“Always be a first-rate version of yourself instead of a second-rate version of someone else.” - Judy Garland

The discipline of gratitude is the explicit effort to acknowledge that all I am and have is given to me as a gift of love, a gift to be celebrated with joy.” - Henri J.M. Nouwen

“Give, and it will be given to you.” - Jesus

Dear Heavenly Father, I pray with these others, to be with our sister Femster. Guide the surgeons' hands. Let your will be done, in Jesus name, Amen

“The greatest gift I ever had came from God; I call him Dad!” - Unknown?

Father in heaven, I thank You for Your great love for Your children, and that it never fails. In You, Lord, lies a great future and death doesn't faze You one bit. Our sister Femster has to undergo this medical procedure and we lift her up to Your safe hands. We know that she will awake from this general anesthetic, either to continue her earthly journey or by Jesus Himself to be with Him. With You she is safe. May Your name be glorified in this situation and I ask that she be at peace. In Jesus' name- amen

Father God, In the name of Jesus I declare your peace and rapid healing over Fem; and wisdom and skill over Dr. Gerahty as well as on the anesthesiologist. Give Fem a calm settled stomach, waking up from surgery like she just woke up from a nice refreshing nap. Amen.

Father in Heaven I lift Lyn to you asking that you give her peace, comfort and confidence in the medical procedures and personnel's ability to determine the issues that she is facing and to effect a cure. These things I pray in the powerful, precious name of Jesus. Amen

Psalm 45 Ode for a Royal Wedding To the leader: according to Lilies. Of the Korahites. A Maskil. A love song. My heart overflows with a goodly theme; I address my verses to the king; my tongue is like the pen of a ready scribe. You are the most handsome of men; grace is poured upon your lips; therefore God has blessed you forever. Gird your sword on your thigh, O mighty one, in your glory and majesty. In your majesty ride on victoriously for the cause of truth and to defend the right; let your right hand teach you dread deeds. Your arrows are sharp in the heart of the king's enemies; the peoples fall under you. Your throne, O God, endures forever and ever. Your royal scepter is a scepter of equity; you love righteousness and hate wickedness. Therefore God, your God, has anointed you with the oil of gladness beyond your companions; your robes are all fragrant with myrrh and aloes and cassia. From ivory palaces stringed instruments make you glad; daughters of kings are among your ladies of honor; at your right hand stands the queen in gold of Ophir. Hear, O daughter, consider and incline your ear; forget your people and your father's house, and the king will desire your beauty. Since he is your lord, bow to him; the people of Tyre will seek your favor with gifts, the richest of the people with all kinds of wealth. The princess is decked in her chamber with gold-woven robes; in many-colored robes she is led to the king; behind her the virgins, her companions, follow. With joy and gladness they are led along as they enter the palace of the king. In the place of ancestors you, O king, shall have sons; you will make them princes in all the earth. I will cause your name to be celebrated in all generations; therefore the peoples will praise you forever and ever.

“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” - Erma Bombeck

“If you are losing a tug-of-war with a tiger, give him the rope before he gets to your arm. You can always buy a new rope.” - Max Gunther

“The Christian does not think God will love us because we are good, but that God will make us good because He loves us; just as the roof of a sunhouse does not attract the sun because it is bright, but becomes bright because the son shines on it.” - C.S. Lewis

“O Father may that Holy Star Grow every year more bright, And send its glorious beams afar To fill the world with light. ” - William Cullen Bryant

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved. ” - Helen Keller

“The continual looking forward to the eternal world is not a form of escapism or wishful thinking, but one of the things a Christian is meant to do.” - C.S. Lewis

“The opposite of joy is not sorrow. It is unbelief.” - Leslie Weatherhead

“None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Burial of the Dead: Rite One I am the resurrection and the life, saith the Lord; he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live; and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth; and though this body be destroyed, yet shall I see God; whom I shall see for myself and mine eyes shall behold, and not as a stranger. For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself. For if we live, we live unto the Lord. and if we die, we die unto the Lord. Whether we live, therefore, or die, we are the Lord's. Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord; even so saith the Spirit, for they rest from their labors. -The Bible

“Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. ” - Susan Ertz

“Difficulties in life are intended to make us better, not bitter.” - Dan Reeves

“Until the will and the affections are brought under the authority of Christ, we have not begun to understand, let alone to accept, His lordship. ” - Elisabeth Elliot