Noooooooo!!!

[olger]

Quote:

they could not stand the sight of each other

If it wasn't that society has offered a quick out of marriage - couples would FIND a way to stand the sight of each other. Of course a split of ANY term of time is appropriate. But if there wasn't the quick fix of divorce - I bet the couple would find a way to come back and have reconciliation.

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22 years at my age is almost unheard of these days

I was also married 22 years when my wife got a case of drifting eyes and ran off with another man.

Again - if the church didn't have such a tolerant view of divorce and remarriage - and the only option would be to make things work - then I have to wonder if some of these affairs and divorces might be avoided.

Spot on. In the church of my fathers (Anabaptist), there is no divorce from members - they are disfellowshipped if they institute a divorce. There is zero remarriage for those (.02%) who are divorced. Anniversaries of 50-60-70 years are the norm, and people seem to be content.

I tell men during premarital counseling - weld the door shut. You are in this for life. God can fix any differences and He can keep love alive. There will be things to balance, that's ok. Balance them with the Word as your guide and He will bring joy into your lives. Ask your self each day "What can I do to make her (his) life worth living today?"

Choose wisely, treat kindly.

[olger]

Miz3

Quote:

The Bible says God hates divorce but it doesn't say that divorce is a "sin".

If it is a sin then Moses gave the children of Israel permission to commit sin.

"“What did Moses say in the law about divorce?”

“Well, he permitted it,” they replied. “He said a man can give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away.”

But Jesus responded, “He wrote this commandment only as a concession to your hard hearts."Mark 10:3-5 NLT

God blesses!

Is pride a sin, LC?

"For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously" (Malachi 2:16). Now let's go here...

"Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment" (Psalm 73:6).

Pride and divorce are linked. Lest we question this link:

"Only by pride cometh contention" (Proverbs 13:10).

Those who have divorce in their past, can resolve the pain by taking it to Jesus. Many people bring issues with them when the come to Christ. After Christ, there is no tolerance whatsoever for divorce, save for adultery and even then the highest ideal is forgiveness, forsaking the moral failure, and reconciliation.

Rejoice always,

g

[Gail]

Good news is that Vanessa Paradis has been reported as denying the reports of a split between her and Johnny Depp. Yay!!! I would love to see them get married, too!

[Woody]

Quote:

Spot on. In the church of my fathers (Anabaptist), there is no divorce from members - they are disfellowshipped if they institute a divorce. There is zero remarriage for those (.02%) who are divorced. Anniversaries of 50-60-70 years are the norm, and people seem to be content.

I tell men during premarital counseling - weld the door shut. You are in this for life. God can fix any differences and He can keep love alive. There will be things to balance, that's ok. Balance them with the Word as your guide and He will bring joy into your lives. Ask your self each day "What can I do to make her (his) life worth living today?"

Brother Olger. You and I are kindred spirits. At least two of us have our heads screwed on straight. Way to go.

[LifeHiscost]

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Each divorce makes it easier and easier for couples to just give up and not bother with the HARD work of reconciliation.

Probably for some. Not so when giving God the Sovereignty of the decision after failure. Take it from one who wasn't that wise for two decisions. In Christ it is the land of new beginnings, as if one had never made a mistake. Thirty fifth year and continuing with happiness for both, on a daily basis. As the song says, One Day at a Time.

God blesses!

[LifeHiscost]

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I tell men during premarital counseling - weld the door shut.

And that puts freedom of choice where?

A person can stay with another until death, but the ones in a cell are seldom happy or contented, despite protestations to the contrary.

God blesses!

[Woody]

Quote:

A person can stay with another until death, but the ones in a cell are seldom happy or contented

Does God guarantee us happiness in marriage? And if we don't have it - we can file for divorce? That's a strange twist on scripture that I am not aware of.

[Gail]

Probably for some. Not so when giving God the Sovereignty of the decision after failure. Take it from one who wasn't that wise for two decisions. In Christ it is the land of new beginnings, as if one had never made a mistake. Thirty fifth year and continuing with happiness for both, on a daily basis. As the song says, One Day at a Time.

So nice to read that, LifeHisCost! I agree! I am wife #4 for my hubby but I think that this time he is serious about working things out. So far, so good- and at the present time our marriage is his second longest. I was a bit nervous at the start!

[Naomi]

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I agree! I am wife #4 for my hubby but I think that this time he is serious about working things out.

He's a smart man I have no doubts that you will be his longest and last wife.

[Woody]

Quote:

I agree! I am wife #4 for my hubby but I think that this time he is serious about working things out.

He's a smart man I have no doubts that you will be his longest and last wife.

[Naomi]

Quote:

Does God guarantee us happiness in marriage? And if we don't have it - we can file for divorce? That's a strange twist on scripture that I am not aware of.

Nope ... no guarantees! You can't rollerskate in a goldfish bowl, but you can be happy if you've a mind to.

OTOH you can't force someone to live with you if they refuse and have decided they love someone else.

[Woody]

Quote:

if they refuse and have decided they love someone else.

You bring up an interesting point.

It far easier to find LOVE. You know - ROMANTIC LOVE ... than it is to find it in ourselves to be true to commitment.

My point is that LOVE is not guaranteed. But one thing that IS required is commitment whether there is love or not.

[Naomi]

Quote:

It far easier to find LOVE. You know - ROMANTIC LOVE ... than it is to find it in ourselves to be true to commitment.

My point is that LOVE is not guaranteed. But one thing that IS required is commitment whether there is love or not.

You are absolutely correct about commitment being required. I know several couples who have been married 40-50 years it appears that they are peerhaps even more committed and thoughtful to their spouses than in earlier years.

Passion,& romantic love are good things but as my mother-in-law used to say "the kissen don't last but the cooken does"

I worked hard to be a good cook

[phkrause]

I believe olger has some good advice. But why just tell the guy to lock the door or weld it shut. It takes two not one. Both need to be willing to work at staying together and most important God needs to be at the center of both peoples lives.

[Gail]

Sometimes even the romantic love is hard to come by for some That's probably why the Bible enjoins us to stick with the wife of our youth.

[Naomi]

I believe olger has some good advice. But why just tell the guy to lock the door or weld it shut. It takes two not one. Both need to be willing to work at staying together and most important God needs to be at the center of both peoples lives.

[Gail]

Needs to be a team!

[Woody]

Quote:

It far easier to find LOVE. You know - ROMANTIC LOVE ... than it is to find it in ourselves to be true to commitment.

My point is that LOVE is not guaranteed. But one thing that IS required is commitment whether there is love or not.

You are absolutely correct about commitment being required. I know several couples who have been married 40-50 years it appears that they are peerhaps even more committed and thoughtful to their spouses than in earlier years.

Passion,& romantic love are good things but as my mother-in-law used to say "the kissen don't last but the cooken does"

I worked hard to be a good cook

Wow!! Being a good cook is a REAL good plus in MY book. Keep a cookin' Naomi

[Naomi]

Quote:

Wow!! Being a good cook is a REAL good plus in MY book. Keep a cookin' Naomi

It's not much fun when you cook for yourself. But, thanks for the accolade

[Woody]

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Wow!! Being a good cook is a REAL good plus in MY book. Keep a cookin' Naomi

It's not much fun when you cook for yourself. But, thanks for the accolade

I agree. But just consider it to be refining your skills for your husband to be.

[Woody]

Considering the amount of burnt offerings I have to accept - I can certainly relate to good cookin'. If you want to get more practice - you could mail them viddles to me and I would assess their quality.

[Naomi]

Are you willing to save your burnt offerings to offer to the Gods?

My question to you is one they ask in Moldova, Are you vegeterian or normal? lol

[Woody]

I prefer to eat vege.

But due to my respect for veges -

I hate to risk burning them.

So -

I do find it easier as a single MALE - to burn meat as offerings.

[Naomi]

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But due to my respect for veges -

I hate to risk burning them.

Words escape me ... you are so thoughtful and I am sure the

veges are grateful.

'sides I have never heard of a veggie as a burnt offering.

[Woody]

Quote:

'sides I have never heard of a veggie as a burnt offering

well there you go.