Daily Lift by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

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Banish Negative Thoughts

One of the great Sages of the 20th century, Rabbi Yeruchem Levovitz, observed: "People become so used to being unhappy that they are unaware of the needless misery they cause themselves. They imprison themselves by filling their minds with thoughts of resentment, hatred, and envy. It is amazing how they tolerate living such a life. The only reason they do tolerate it is because they have become so used to living with these thoughts that they feel it's normal. They think it's impossible for life to be any different!"

Be totally resolved to free your mind from thoughts of resentment, hatred, and envy. If your brain focuses on thoughts that needlessly cause you emotional distress, say a loud, "NEXT!" Then begin to focus on something else that will be more worthwhile. You have the ability to make yourself happy!

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Work On Your Traits

Overcoming negative character traits is the essence and purpose of life. Therefore, we need to continuously strengthen ourselves. If you do not work on overcoming your traits, what is the purpose of your life?

Today, which two negative character traits would you like most to change? Imagine a miracle happened and you woke up tomorrow with the positive traits that are the polar opposites of those traits. In what ways would your life be different?

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Learn To Ignore Insults

When a wise person is insulted, he acts as if he doesn't know that anything's been said. He acts toward the insult like a deaf person who does not hear and a mute who cannot speak. He walks away as if nothing happened. He does not repeat the incident to anyone.

On the other hand, people who respond to insults - or even worse, tell others how someone insulted them - cause themselves humiliation.

Learning to ignore insults is a valuable skill. Mentally prepare yourself in advance to act as if you are totally deaf when it comes to hearing insults.

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Order Your Thoughts

When a number of unrelated thoughts enter your mind, try to construct some order. Decide which issue you will think about first. Only when you have finished that, then may you go on to the second issue.

This will train you to think in a way which prevents confusion.

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Ignore Insults

We have an obligation to be extremely careful not to do or say anything that will constitute even a minor slight to the honor and respect due another person. However, if someone insults us, we should tolerate what they say and still strive to be kind to that person.

Of course, this is not an easy level to reach. It takes much hard work and effort to train yourself to ignore the insults of others. If a person identifies himself as a body, it is truly difficult to develop these antithetical positions.

By realizing that you are a soul, however, you will be aware of having been created in the image of the Almighty. Why is this important? Because tolerating insults is part of the commandment to emulate the Almighty - Who bestows life upon us even when we do things that are against His will!

Today, if someone insults you, focus on the following thought: Other people's insults do not really cause you harm.

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Develop a Tolerant Attitude

Develop a tolerant attitude toward the habits and idiosyncrasies of others. Otherwise, you'll find yourself constantly annoyed by others.

Try to turn the potential annoyance into something positive. For example, if you are attending a class and someone frequently asks irrelevant questions, don't become annoyed. Rather, view each question as an opportunity to help you build up your "tolerance muscles!"

Today, catch yourself getting annoyed by something, and consciously use it to develop your level of patience.

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A Healthy Concern For Students

The saintly Chafetz Chaim used to direct his yeshiva students to eat properly, get enough sleep, and take walks. Only if someone is healthy will he be able to study properly. Occasionally the Chafetz Chaim personally closed the lights in his yeshiva late at night to make sure the students got sufficient rest.

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Give Up Demands For Status

Honor-seeking often motivates people more than any other desire in the world. If a person would give up his demands for status, he would be content as long as his minimum needs for food, clothing, and shelter were met.

A great part of a person's need for money comes from his demand for status. Because he wants the admiration of others, he feels a need for expensive clothing and a fancy home. A person who gives up his demand for approval will be able to clarify for what his actual needs are, and save himself from needless toil and suffering.

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Showing Off Knowledge

A person who wants to show off his knowledge will get upset if others fail to recognize what he knows. But a person who has humility will not demand recognition, and will not be bothered if others are unaware of what he knows (unless there is some practical difference involved).

Ask yourself, "What actual difference does it make if this person is or is not aware of what I know?"

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Choose A Wise Self-Image

Self-image is how you view yourself. In reality it is easy to view yourself the way others view you. But ultimately it is you who selects which view you will accept. Some people access the view of negative individuals and make it their own. This is not a wise choice. Select the views of those who realize you are created in the Almighty's image, you are a child of the Creator, and the world was created for you. Why settle for anything less? And make certain that the one individual whose opinion makes the most difference in your life views you in this way. That person is you.

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Defuse Your Anger Messages

Simply telling yourself, "I should not be angry right now," will usually not calm you. Moreover, if you lose your temper and tell yourself you shouldn't be angry, you are apt to feel excessive anxiety and guilt in addition to the anger.

Rather, try to be aware of what specifically is making you angry. (For example, "It's awful that he is talking to me this way.") Once you give up those anger-causing self-statements, you will feel less anger.

Challenge your self-statements that lead to anger. ("Why is it so awful if he talks to me this way? I might not enjoy it, but I will not take it to heart.")

Once you perceive someone's behavior or words in a positive or even neutral light, you will not be angry. ("He's speaking to me that way because he cares about me and wants me to improve." Or, "He's talking this way because he is personally upset.")

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Clarify Before You Judge

Be careful not to become angry if you hear that someone has done something against you, for frequently the actual story is not what you had originally thought it to be.

Learn to react with the following question, "How do I really know that what I heard is true?" People often get angry over incidents that supposedly took place and later found that details had been distorted or left out, and what actually took place was much different from what was originally reported. Also, the context and tone of voice of a given statement can easily be misunderstood. Always be aware of the possibility that what you have heard may not be accurate.

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Counterfeit Courage

Counterfeit money isn't real. Neither is counterfeit courage. Exaggerating one's brave and heroic acts in order to prove to others that one has courage, is a sign of a lack of courage. This applies all the more so, if someone were to fabricate an entire incident.

Ask yourself: Do I ever try to give others the impression that I have more courage than I really do? If the answer is, "Yes," see this as a sign that you need to increase genuine courage.

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Visualize Courage

Your magnificent brain can make mental pictures of how you would like to speak and act. The more times you repeat these pictures, the more ingrained they become. These mental pictures will make it easier for you to follow through in reality.

Utilize this gift from the Creator to increase your level of courage.

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Upgrade Your Courage

Every time you upgrade your brain with courage in any context, you can create an automatic upgrade of courage in all contexts. This general principle is true for all attributes and states. It is especially important to realize this when it comes to courage.

There is a powerful slogan to help us remember this valuable principle: "This, too, will upgrade my courage."

The more courage something takes, the more courage you have available for the rest of your life.

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Find The Courage

Each and every day look for an opportunity to do an act of courage. Some days this will be easy to find. You might find that the acts of courage that come your way are more than you bargained for.

Other days, you might have to search for something you can say or do that will be an act of courage. The fact that you are seeking courageous opportunities automatically makes you a more courageous person.

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What Is Courage

Courage comes in many flavors. In general, courage is defined as the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or adversity. It is staunchness of mind and of will. It is the strength to face opposition and not allow it to stop you. It is the strength to cope with hardship. It is maintaining your dignity when it is difficult to do so.

Courage gives you the empowerment of steely determination. It enables you to strive towards noble aspirations.

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Rise With The Challenge

Someone once asked the Chafetz Chaim: "My evil inclination does not give me any rest. What can I do?"

"That is really for your good," replied the Chafetz Chaim. "The purpose of life is to overcome our forbidden impulses. We are frequently in a state of conflict. By controlling negative desires, we elevate ourselves. The more difficult the challenge, the greater the merit."

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Watch Your Words: They Create Your Life

The words you speak program and condition your mind. When you speak words of gratitude, you are programming and conditioning your brain and mind to experience more and more gratitude.

Speaking words of negativity and ingratitude program and condition your brain and mind to experience less and less gratitude and more and more misery.

You create your habits and your habits create you. By speaking words of gratitude regularly, you are developing the habit of speaking words of gratitude. The more you keep up this habit, the easier it becomes to say even more words of gratitude. As you continue to speak words of gratitude, thoughts of gratitude are integrated into your mind and you will spontaneously think and speak this way.

Catch yourself whenever what you say is an expression of a lack of gratitude. Instead of being upset with yourself for still lacking as much gratitude as you would wish, be grateful that you are becoming more aware of your lapses. This awareness will enable you to be more careful from now on.

It would be a good idea, to resolve that whenever you hear yourself saying something that is ungrateful, you immediately make five statements of gratitude.

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A New Level Of Courage

There will be instances when you do something exceptionally courageous. Don't think, "I had courage here, but this really wasn't me. Normally I can't do these type of things."

It is much wiser to think, "This has upgraded the courage level of my brain." You are no longer on the previous level of courage, but on the present level. This is your actual reality.

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Anxiety Builds Courage

From the perspective of courage, every time you experience fear you have another opportunity to increase your level of courage.

With some situations, the very fact that your initial reaction is one of fear, in itself renders the words you say and the actions you take into courageous words and deeds. If you would be doing the very same thing and it would be easy for you, it would not be a courage-building event.

Now that you needed to overcome your anxiety and fear, your level of courage is rising. This opens you up to a wealth of future possibilities that would not have been possible without the courage you are adding to your character.

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Hear The Message

Habit has great power. We can become used to almost everything. We can become so used to a life of suffering that we are no longer aware that suffering is not the way life should be lived.

This tendency to lack a feeling of suffering is the biggest obstacle to becoming elevated through suffering. Since we do not feel the suffering, we do not pay attention to it and do not hear its message.

To overcome this, we must obtain an awareness that whenever things are not as they should be, it is a message that we should improve ourselves in some area.

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Get Up The Courage

Courage is a trait. Like all traits it can be improved. No one is born with highly-developed courage. We are all born as helpless infants.

Regardless of how little or how much courage one presently has, there is an ongoing need to gain even more -- and everyone can learn how to accomplish this.

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Increase Your Knowledge

Regardless of how much you know, constantly be aware that there is much knowledge you are still lacking. This will motivate you to continually seek perfection.

What specific knowledge are you lacking that you would like to gain? Make a step today to gain some of that knowledge.

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Ask What To Change

A person who is "wise in his own eyes" will not make positive changes. Since he thinks he is right, he is not aware of his negative and counterproductive behavior. But if a person is aware of his improper behavior, there is always hope that he will correct himself.

Today, ask someone whom you're close with what they would suggest that you change about yourself. (This is scary, but worth it!)