Ask the Rabbi

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25 Tevet

Rabbinic Fences

I can appreciate the rules and mitzvot as they appear in the Torah. But when the rabbis start adding their own layers of restrictions, I feel encroached upon. What is the point of all this?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

If there's a hole in the middle of the street, the municipality comes and erects a fence so no one will get hurt by falling in. The purpose of a fence is to guard and protect, to keep us safe from danger.

The Sages are empowered to make "protective fences." This is part and parcel of the Torah, and is not considered extra. (Though of course, the Sages will specify that their fence is rabbinic in nature, to avoid confusion with the Torah law.)

As one example, the Torah says: "Do not boil a kid in it's mother's milk." On a Torah level, this only refers to meat from the three domesticated animals - cow, goat and sheep. However, since people "intuitively" associate chicken as "meat," we also do not mix chicken and milk. This "rabbinic fence" was accepted by the entire Jewish people as binding law.

If we appreciate the severity of transgressing the Torah (a sensitivity which has, unfortunately, been lost to many people today), then we will understand how absolutely vital these rabbinic fences are.

I hope this helps explain.

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26 Tevet

Morning Washing

I read in the Kitzur Shulchan Aruch (2:1) that when sleeping, an unclean spirit dwells upon the body, and that's why we wash our hands in the morning. What does washing have to do with getting it off our fingers when we awake? I know that I have a spirit, but here it says that I have a second spirit, that is present when I sleep. If this is so, then does everyone have a second spirit and where do these spirits stay while we are awake? How do these spirits know how to come back to us directly, especially to those people who do traveling and often sleep in different locations while on their trips?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

The law that you cite is perhaps a little easier to understand in the original Hebrew. The Hebrew word for this spirit that remains on one's hands in the morning time is called "Ruach Rah." Ruach Rah is an impurity that comes about from sleeping. It has nothing to do with your own soul, which in Hebrew is called a Neshama. The Neshama stays with you always.

Ruach Rah is a stubborn impurity that can only be removed by a special hand-washing procedure. Here's how it is done:

Hold a washing cup in right hand and fill it with water.

Pass the cup to the left hand and pour water over the right hand (up until the wrist).

Pass the cup to the right hand and pour water over the left hand (up until the wrist).

Then pass again to the left hand and pour, and then to the right and pour, then to the left and pour and then to the right and pour, until you have poured water over each hand three times.

If one pours water on his right hand three times, and then on his left three times without washing them intermittently, this does not successfully remove the "Ruach Rah." (Code of Jewish law - O.C. 4:2)

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Today's Featured Ask the Rabbi Question

Mismatched Torah Portions

I flew to Israel last week and on Shabbat they read a different Torah portion than the one they were reading at my synagogue back home. What gives?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

This is a good question, and it stems from the fact that Jews in Israel keep one day of Yom Tov, while Yom Tov lasts two days in the Diaspora.

As you know, one Torah portion is read every week in the synagogue on Shabbat. However, when a Yom Tov falls out on Shabbat, the weekly Torah portion is delayed and the special holiday portion is read instead.

Now imagine a case where Yom Tov falls out on Friday. In Israel, the following day - Shabbat - will have the regular Torah reading for that Shabbat. But in the Diaspora, when Shabbat is the second day of Yom Tov, the Shabbat reading is replaced by the reading for Yom Tov.

In that way, those living in the Diaspora actually fall one Torah portion behind Israel.

Don't worry, though. Everyone catches up within a few weeks. This is achieved by having only those outside of Israel double-up and read two Torah portions together on the same Shabbat. After that, things are re-aligned.

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28 Tevet

Gambling

Is gambling in a casino permitted?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Judaism generally looks disparagingly on gambling. The Talmud says that someone who earns their salary from gambling is invalid to serve as a witness in a Jewish court. Since the person who lost the bet doesn't really pay with a full heart, the winner's earning are considered a form of theft.

According to another opinion in the Talmud, only a professional gambler -- who has no other source of income -- is invalid as a witness. This is because he is not involved in productive activity and contributes nothing to the betterment of society.

Some rabbinical sources allow buying lottery tickets, if the money is for mitzvah purposes, and it is as such not a matter of "losing money" (as with gambling) when the winner is declared. Thus the meager amount given in the beginning to buy the ticket, is given with a full heart for the mitzvah.

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29 Tevet

Prayer in Any Language

Is there a wrong way to pray if I don't know the Hebrew text? Do I just pray with whatever is in my heart? I consider myself a spiritual person. However, I tried praying a lot from a prayer book and it felt like something artificial. I try talking directly to the supreme being, God. That works better, but I still feel that I am missing something. I feel that one's relationship with God should be personal. Could you add some words of wisdom and help me understand prayer and spirituality better?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

There is a famous story about a young shepherd boy. (Jewish stories are often about shepherds, probably because all the Jewish patriarchs, matriarchs and early kings were shepherds.)

One day, this boy was passing by a synagogue and heard people inside praying. He came inside to join them. The only problem was they were all praying from prayer books. The shepherd boy was essentially illiterate, though he did know how to say the letters of the Hebrew alphabet. Not knowing what else to do, he stood in the back of the synagogue and yelled out "Aleph! Bet! Gimmel!" until he finished the entire alphabet.

Two of the worshippers were so offended that they went over to the shepherd boy and were about to escort him outside, when the rabbi told them: "Stop! That boy's shouting was more precious than any other prayers said here today! His prayer went straight up to Heaven!"

The point of the story is that prayer counts when it comes from the heart. Any relationship is built on communication, and communication has to come from the heart. As King David said (Psalms 145:18), "God is close to all who call upon Him, to all who call sincerely." God yearns to give us the pleasure of connection. Indeed, the Talmud says that God made Sarah, Rivka and Rachel barren, so that they would turn to Him in prayer.

That is the "spirit" behind prayer. But what about Jewish law?

All of the prayers and blessings can be said in any language that a person understands, with one stipulation: If they are said in any language other than Hebrew, they must be understood. (OC 62, Biur Halacha). Implied is that if you pray in Hebrew, you don't need to understand what is being said. That is because Hebrew has a special strength, since each Hebrew word and letter contains deep mystical meaning, which is otherwise lost in translation.

The Great Assembly (4th century BCE, Land of Israel), were prophets who captured specific mystical secrets when choosing the language for the formalized prayers we have today. If we could truly understand the words of the "Amidah" ("Shmonei Esrei"), we would see that everything is encapsulated in those words. This particular combination allows the supplicant to receive the goodness and direction that God is waiting to give him. (Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzatto - Way of God 4:5:1)

Nevertheless, there is still personal prayer, which can be said at any time, in any place (except for a bathrooms or other unclean area), and in any language. Even if you were plunged in the depths of depression, lying in bed, not wanting to see a person in the world, even if you only mumbled three words, "God send help," God listens to you.

If you want something to help get you started, here's an opening line that's sure to work:

Dear God, Give me the courage to let go and let you in. I know you love me. And with your help, I will find all the purpose, joy, and happiness You want me to have.

My suggestion to you is to make an effort top not only say the words of the prayers written in the Siddur, but to study the meaning behind them as well. There are some excellent books available here: http://www.artscroll.com/Categories/pco.html

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1 Shevat

The Term "Jew"

Our nation was historically called Israelites or Hebrews. I am wondering why always you refer to the Israelite or the Hebrew Nation as "Jew" when only after the captivity of 722 BCE that the people of the Tribe of Judah were called "Jews." Nowadays, “Jew” is the common term for any believer or follower of the "Jewish" belief. Am I wrong?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

From the time of the prophet Joshua, when the Jewish people came into the Land of Israel, each of the 12 Tribes settled a different area of land. The area that each tribe settled became known by the tribe's name – for example, the region around Jerusalem is known as Judah. At this time, when the term "Judah-ite" was used, it only referred to those who came from that tribe.

In the late 700s BCE, approximately two-thirds of the Jewish nation was taken into captivity. The only parts of the Land of Israel that remained were the portions of Judah and Benjamin. (Since then, the Ten Tribes' whereabouts has been unknown.) When the Romans became the ruling power of the Middle East 2000 years ago, they referred to this entire region as "Judea," since that Judah was significantly larger than Benjamin. Therefore, all the people came to be called "Judean," from which derives the English word "Jew."

There is a deep lesson to be derived from this historical reality. In Hebrew, the word Judah includes all the letters to spell out God's four-letter name, plus a Daled ("D"). The Daled stands for King David, who was the first king over the united Jewish people, and the forefather of the Messiah.

Yehuda means "to admit" or "acknowledge." In the Bible, when Tamar was about to be executed for adultery, Yehuda risked his personal reputation and stood up for the truth, admitting that he was the one responsible for her predicament. For thousands of years, that has been the hallmark of the Jewish people: standing up for what is right, even at personal expense.

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There going over the same questions. So until they actual do new ask the Rabbi, this will be it.

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Well I did say I'd not, but you know, sometimes its good to hear it again or how the Jewish mind works. So I'll start posting these again.

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27 Adar

Kosher Symbols

When I was growing up, most kosher products had the symbol O-U. But now there seems to be everything – Texas-K, California-K, Minnesota-K. How do I know what kosher supervision is considered reliable?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Be aware that just because a product is labeled with a "K" does not necessarily mean it's kosher. In America, there is no law barring a company from putting any letter they want on a label, whether the product is ice tea or pork rinds.

One rabbi told me that he was supervising a kosher bakery in Florida, and when they wanted to start using a non-kosher ingredient, the rabbi told them, "If you use that ingredient, then I will have to remove the certification." They replied, "That's okay, we'll just continue putting a 'K' on our packaging anyway."

For reliable supervision, O-U, O-K, Star-K, and Chaf-K are some of the most common symbols (called “hekshers”). There are many others, some good and some not-so-good. If you have a specific question, you should check with a rabbi well-versed in Jewish law, or try the web site www.kosherquest.org.

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28 Adar

Intermarriage Correspondence from a Non-Jew

First off, thank you so much for this wonderful service that you provide. I find comfort in just knowing that someone out there is willing to listen...

I have been blessed with finding a wonderful friend and companion but we have a problem – I was raised Catholic (though non-practicing and don't consider myself a part of the church) and he is a practicing Jew. Though he doesn't go to Temple every week, he does celebrate the holidays with his family. His mother grew up in Israel and holds her traditions very close to her and has shared those traditions with her children.

Though we've grown up with different faiths, we have an amazing connection that I've never experienced with any other person before. I have the deepest respect and admiration for him and for the culture and religion that has contributed to the person that he has become.

Though we both think we're too young to discuss marriage and children (he's 26, I'm 25), we've been forced to talk about them within the context of religion. With research and careful contemplation and after confirming the support of my parents, I told him that if we were to have children, I would be willing to raise them in the Jewish tradition.

I know that this would take a lot of effort from both of us, but I would do it without feeling as though I was sacrificing one ounce of who I am. I've just begun studying Hebrew and Jewish traditions and history and I feel like every bit of learning brings me closer to him and closer to my own spirituality.

His older brother married a Catholic girl and it tore his mother apart. I would never want to put him in a position where he felt he was hurting his family, is there anything that I can do or say or learn that might make it easier for us?

My own mother brought up the idea of conversion, but I know that I would just be doing it for him and that would be disrespectful to the spirit of the religion. I'm so torn up about this. I would deeply appreciate any guidance.

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Firstly, I must tell you how impressed I was by your honesty and sensitivity – especially, by what you wrote at the end about not wanting to convert just for him.

Here are my thoughts on the matter.

First of all, even though it is most gracious of you to agree to raise his children as Jews, there really wouldn't be any point in it, for the children of a non-Jewish mother, (as wonderful as you may be) are not Jewish, even if the father is Jewish. This is the law of Judaism as has been handed down to us generation to generation for thousands of years.

So there is really only one of two choices.

A sincere conversion on your part, or breaking up as difficult as that may be.

Here are my thoughts on these two options:

It is true that if you convert “just for him” it is "disrespectful for the spirit of the religion" as you so impressively put it. But perhaps, through your study of Torah, you will decide that Judaism offers the truthful answer to man's existence in this world, and you will decide to convert even if you were not dating a Jew.

However, this would entail additional challenges. Because a sincere conversion to Judaism would mean a commitment to observing all the laws of the Torah – which unfortunately your friend is probably only partially informed of, despite his admirable interest in preserving the holidays with his family.

The laws of Judaism (as found in the Torah) are very beautiful and have given those of us who preserve its commandments the ability to live wonderful lives filled with happiness truth and meaning. But they are all-encompassing, sometimes a bit difficult, and include much more than being together with family at holiday time.

There would be no point in a conversion on your part, even a sincere one, if you would then proceed to live your life together with your boyfriend as non-observant Jews. For once a sincere conversion is performed, you will be a Jew in every regard, and you will be obligated to observe the laws of true traditional Judaism.

Of course, there is always a possibility that a sincere conversion on your part would convince him of the validity of the Jewish tradition and its commandments and bring him back to a Torah-true lifestyle. Indeed, cases like have happened before.

Now for the second choice: breaking up.

With all due respect and for the very special relationship you have with this man, decisions require a conference of the mind as well.

If intellectually you understand that it is improper to marry this man, (for the reasons you mentioned, and because he would be going against his own religion by doing so, his children will not be Jewish, and it is not proper for you to be his wife given the ramifications of such a marriage), then how can you marry him?

Sure, we are able at times to bury certain ideas under the carpet, but they have ways of creeping out again, because despite our emotional side, intellectual reality is a hard thing to avoid.

Ask yourself: Will a marriage that I cannot be intellectually united with be a happy one?

Again, I admire the courage and sincerity that it took to write you letter. In Judaism, we say: Make up your mind that you want to do the correct thing and the light of G-d will shine light upon your path.

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29 Adar

Prayer Book

I've been having a strong desire to pray every day. I've been basically making up my own prayers. But I figure I should probably see what the traditional Jewish prayer book has to offer. (After all, it has served us well for millennia.) Is there are particular edition that you can recommend?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

As far as commentary and instruction on Jewish prayer, nothing comes close to the ArtScroll Siddur (artscroll.com). The prayers are translated into modern English by top-rate Jewish scholars, who understand the subtleties of the Hebrew language and have a great knowledge of Talmudic sources.

More than just a text of the prayers, this includes full explanations of all prayers, laws and customs. It features a masterful essay on the essence of prayer. It includes special prayers for the holidays and lifecycle events.

The ArtScroll Siddur also comes in a transliterated version. And there is also an amazing "inter-linear" edition which enables you to pray in the original Hebrew, while following along the English translation.

See it online at: http://www.artscroll.com/siddur.htm

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1 Nisan

Calendar Software

Is there any way I can get hold of a Jewish calendar for the current year?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

You can get a copy of a software program called "Kaluach" which is a Jewish calendar covering thousands of years, giving you dates of holidays, parshas, candle-lighting times, etc. It covers hundreds of cities throughout the world, and switches from English to Hebrew - plus lots of other fun gadgets.

It is available free at (where else?) Aish.com. http://www.aish.com/jl/hol/o/48970511.html

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2 Nisan

Tallit Stripes

What is the reason that just about every tallit has a series of stripes running vertically down the tallit. Is there a reason or is it just decorative? If decorative, when did this practice begin?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

The tallit needn't be striped at all, yet in fact most are striped. some are striped blue, some black, some bright white, and some with a multitude of colors. Yet in Jewish law the stripes are insignificant. So why the stripes?

Nobody really knows. Yet this is how it's been done by practically all communities throughout the Diaspora for as long as we know, and so we continue the practice.

In 1960, Yigal Yadin headed an archaeological expedition in the Judean desert of Israel. The purpose was to explore a number of caves known to have been used as a hideout for Jews during the Bar Kokhba revolt against Rome (132-135 CE). One of the fascinating discoveries was a number of Jewish tunics, each with stripes similar to the tallit of today. In Yigal Yadin's book, "Bar-Kokhba" (ch. 7), he writes that this was the Roman style of the times.

It is also possible that the stripes in the Tallit were a sort of substitute for the blue string in the Tzitzit, since the identity of the snail that was to be used for the dye was lost.

To learn more, see "Tztzith – A Thread of Light" by Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan.

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3 Nisan

Bar Mitzvah Gift

My nephew is having his bar mitzvah and I am thinking of a gift. In the old days, the gift of choice was a fountain pen, then a Walkman, and today an iPod. But I want to get him something special. What do you suggest?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Since this event celebrates the young person becoming obligated in the commandments, the most appropriate gift is, naturally, one that gives a deeper understanding of the Jewish heritage and enables one to better perform the mitzvot! (An iPod, s/he can get anytime.)

With that in mind, my favorite gift idea is a tzedakah (charity) box. Every Jew should have a tzedakah box in his home, so he can drop in change on a regular basis. The money can then be given to support a Jewish school or institution -- in your home town or in Israel (every Jews’ “home town”). There are beautiful tzedakah boxes made of wood and silver, and you can see a selection here.

For boys, a really beautiful gift is a pair of tefillin, the black leather boxes which contain parchments of Torah verses, worn on the bicep and the head. Your browser may not support display of this image. Owning a pair of Tefillin (and wearing them!) is an important part of Jewish identity. But since they are expensive (about $400), not every Bar Mitzvah boy has a pair. To make sure you get kosher Tefillin, see here.

The next obvious gift is a Jewish book. There are many hundreds of titles to choose from, so I’ve narrowed it down to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah Top 10. Just click on the title to order:

• Stone Chumash (published by ArtScroll), an excellent translation of the Five Books of Moses with running commentary on every page

• Book of our Heritage by Rabbi Eliyahu Kitov (Feldheim), a beautiful overview of the Jewish holidays

• The Bar Mitzvah Treasury, an illustrated collection of customs and inspiring stories (by Rabbi Yonah Weinrib and Rabbi Yaakov Salomon; ArtScroll)

• The Thinking Teenagers Guide to Life by Rabbi Akiva Tatz (Targum), gripping essays on forging a path through life

• Sand and Stars by Yaffa Ganz (ArtScroll), a two-volume book about Jewish history, written especially for teenagers

• Shmooze by Rabbi Nechemia Coopersmith, a fun book that provokes thoughtful discussions on essential Jewish issues

• The Long Road to Freedom, by Avner Gold, an exciting historical novel filled with intrigue and insight into Jewish life

• Bible for the Clueless But Curious by Rabbi Nachum Braverman (Leviathan), packed with wisdom on relationships, spirituality and more

• Candles in my Window by Beth Firestone, a delightful fiction book about a young girl discovering her Judaism

• Triumph – Aish.com’s popular book of inspiring true stories of challenge and spiritual growth

If all else fails, you can always give money. It is a nice idea to give $18 (or some multiple thereof), since the numerical value of 18 in Hebrew is "Chai," which means "Life."

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4 Nisan

Adultery - Jewish Perspective

What is so bad about adultery that it is prohibited in the 10 commandments?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

To paraphrase Dennis Prager, Judaism has a sexual ideal: marital sex. Judaism placed controls on sexual activity, demanding that it be channeled into marriage. This quite simply changed the world and made the creation of Western civilization possible. Societies that did not place boundaries around sexuality were stymied in their development. The subsequent dominance of the Western world can largely be attributed to the sexual revolution initiated by Judaism, and later carried forward by Christianity.

This revolution began the arduous task of elevating the status of women. It is probably impossible for us, who live thousands of years after Judaism began this process, to perceive the extent to which undisciplined sex can dominate society. (Although we are perhaps seeing the ill effects of unrestrained sexualization in some aspects of Western society today.)

The bedrock of Western civilization, and of Jewish life, has been the centrality and purity of family life. Children need the stability to grow and develop in a family unit with a mother and father, each giving their appropriate influences. Adultery attacks the family unit at its core. Once adultery enters into the marriage, the chances of divorce increase, and at the very least the closeness and unity of the couple - and subsequently the entire family - breaks down. At stake is our civilization.

On a deeper level, if one has formed a solid relationship with his spouse, this will help develop his fidelity to God as well. The converse is also true: One who is disloyal to his spouse will most likely be disloyal to God.

The Midrash says this idea is alluded to by the placement of different commandments on the two tablets. The seventh commandment, the prohibition against adultery, appears opposite the second commandment, "Do not have other gods before me." This positioning is not accidental, but rather hints that loyalty to spouse and loyalty to God go hand-in-hand.

Adultery is much worse than just cheating on one's partner. It corrupts the entire basis of how we act in this world - and that demands strong counter-measures.

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5 Nisan

Jewish Mission

I read on Aish.com that "Every Jew is equally important to our mission." Pardon my question, but exactly what is our mission?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

No need to apologize. The only bad question is one that remains unasked.

Rabbi Noah Weinberg zt”l wrote an article for Israel's 50th anniversary, which was published in Azure magazine (www.azure.org.il). There he writes:

"Tikkun Olam" is the basis of what drives the Jewish people to greatness. It all started back with Abraham. His business was to go out and teach what it means to be "created in the image of God." He demonstrated how a human being has to take responsibility for the world. Abraham's undertaking was the first progressive, liberal movement the world had ever seen. And look how it succeeded!

Tikkun Olam is the Jewish legacy. In looking back at the first 3,000 years of Jewish history, we don't recall the names of any great entertainers or athletes or corporate executives. We recall the great teachers of the Jewish message: Moses, King David, Maimonides, the Vilna Gaon. That is the essential Jewish legacy. The message was engrained in our souls at Mount Sinai and it is the single defining characteristic of our people.

Torah methodology is universal – for Jews and non-Jews, religious and secular, Israel and the diaspora, left and right. The Torah is alive and relevant for today. And for the Jewish people, the ability to effectively communicate this message is our single most important undertaking.

I hope this helps answer your question. Though this raises a whole new question: What are you going to do about it?!

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6 Nisan

Consuming Blood

I was wondering about the Blood Libels that have plagued the Jewish people over the centuries. We’ve been accused of killing non-Jewish children to drink their blood. I have trouble understanding this, as I always thought that the Torah forbids the consumption of blood. Please explain.

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

One thing I can say about anti-Semitism is that it is highly irrational.

The Torah forbids eating the blood of an animal or bird (Leviticus 7:26).

Although we never know the ultimate reason for God's instructions, the Sefer Hachinuch (Mitzvot 147-148) provides possible explanations for the prohibition of eating blood. He quotes Nachmanides to the effect that "you are what you eat." Since the “soul” of a creature is in the blood, consuming this blood can cause the coarseness of the animal to be passed over to the consumer. It is not proper for a divine human soul to mix with the crass animal soul.

In order to extract the blood, the entire surface of meat must be covered with coarse salt. It is then left for an hour on an inclined or perforated surface to allow the blood to flow down freely. The meat is then thoroughly washed to remove all salt. Meat must be koshered within 72 hours after slaughter so as not to permit the blood to congeal. (An alternate means of removing the blood is through broiling on a perforated grate over an open fire.)

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7 Nisan

Avraham Serving the Angels

In Genesis 18:8, three angels appear to Abraham. It says that Abraham served them milk and a calf. I realize that the laws of kashrut prohibiting mixtures of milk and meat were not given until 500 years later, but wouldn't Abraham have had the spiritual sensitivity to stay away from such a dangerous mixture?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Good question! In fact, the Talmud states that Abraham observed all the mitzvahs. So how could he be mixing milk and meat? Many different answers are offered:

1) The reason we wait 6 hours after eating meat is because we are concerned about strands of meat being stuck between the teeth; also the fatty nature of meat leaves a residue in one's mouth and stomach. These reasons don't apply if one has eaten a milk product, and therefore no waiting is required (providing one rinses his mouth). This is indicated by a careful reading of the verse which states that Abraham first gave them the dairy products, and then the meat. (Daas Zekeinim)

2) The verse says that "Abraham stood over them." He did so to ensure that there was no mixing of meat and milk. (Midrash Hagadol)

3) The verse says that Abraham gave them "the calf that he made." Some commentators say that this was not a real calf, but rather a creation that Abraham was able to conjure up (“made”) using spiritual powers. So the calf was not actual meat, and was thus permitted to be eaten with milk.

4) When the verse says that "the angels ate," it cannot possibly mean this, because angels are spiritual beings and do not eat. Thus there was no problem of milk and meat, because they actually "ate" nothing!

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8 Nisan

Adoption

We are looking to adopt a Jewish child, preferably a baby (as yet unborn). Can you help us find one in Israel, possibly an out-of-wedlock situation. It would be a real mitzvah for all concerned. We have excellent references within our Jewish community.

In general, what is the view of the Jewish religion toward adoption in cases of infertility? Is there a risk that adopting a child is like giving up hope of conceiving?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

The official Israeli adoption agency, Sherut L'Ma'an Hayeled, requires adopters to live in Israel (at least at the outset of adoption). And even for Israelis, the waiting list to adopt a Jewish baby is approximately six years.

I would suggest that you inquire of prominent rabbis, who are often told about unwanted babies, or befriend labor ward hospital staff and ask to be tipped off when a baby is likely to be abandoned.

Given the scarcity of finding a Jewish baby to adopt, many people will look in South America or the former Soviet Republics. It is important to note, however, that a non-Jewish child who is adopted by a Jewish family is not Jewish. Only the Jewish mother's biological children are automatically Jews.

An adopted child, however, has the option of conversion, just like any other non-Jew. The child is brought to the Beit Din, has a Bris and dunks in the Mikveh. When he reaches the age of maturity (12 for a girl, 13 for a boy), he/she has the option of declining to accept a lifetime of Judaism.

In general, the Beit Din will only allow such a conversion if the parents themselves agree to observe all 613 mitzvahs of the Torah. This is the only way it is reasonable to assume that the child will also observe the mitzvahs. Otherwise the child is being put into a situation where he is “sinning” from the get-go. I’m sure that you can understand the internal contradiction that this would create.

I highly recommend a book called “The Bamboo Cradle” by Avraham Schwartzbaum, the story of an American couple who adopted a baby in China, and the amazing Jewish journey that results.

The idea of adopting is a humanitarian act and is quite meritorious. The Talmud (Sanhedrin 19b) says that one who raises an orphan in his home, it is as if he had given birth to him. (A child given up for adoption is, in essence, a child without parents that are capable, or willing to raise him.) Thus, a couple who physically cannot bear children, can raise a child and it will be considered as if they had given birth to the child.

The Sages also say that if the couple is not medically sterile, but they have other problems which hinders childbirth; then in merit of the adoption, God will bless them with one or more of their own.

Here are some recommended books on the topic of Jewish adoption:

• "And the Lord Will Gather Me In," by David Klinghoffer

• "Adopting After Infertility" by Patricia Johnston

• "Launching a Baby's Adoption: Practical Strategies " by Patricia Johnston

• "And Hannah Wept" by Rabbi Michael Gold

• "Sweet Grapes: How to Stop Being Infertile and Start Living Again" by Jean and Michael Carter

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9 Nisan

Cleaning Craze

I find it a bit confusing the requirements for cleaning chametz. On one hand, your website says that we don't have to go crazy. But then you say that we must make sure there are no crumbs around that could fall into our food. It sounds to me that we do have to go crazy!

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Yes, it is confusing. That's because there are two separate issues at stake.

On one hand, the Torah prohibits the mere possession of chametz during Passover, even if we will not eat it (Exodus 13:7). In Jewish law, any piece of chametz the size of a large olive (50 cc or larger) has to be removed from our possession. Thus, we should clean as much as we can, but not go crazy over tiny crumbs.

The second issue is that the Torah prohibits eating chametz during Passover (Exodus 13:3). What quantity of chametz are we not allowed to eat? Even one tiny crumb!

And that's where the "crazy" cleaning comes in. Because if there are any crumbs around, they could somehow make their way into the food. To prevent that, we very thoroughly clean all areas where we'll be preparing and eating food. This includes washing the kitchen chairs, covering the table, using a different set of pots, dishes and silverware, covering the kitchen counters - and even wiping off the light switches, doorknobs and telephone. We also make sure that our clothes are clean of chametz, in order that crumbs won't fall into our food during Passover.

Areas of the house that you will not be touching during Passover, only need to be checked for the larger olive-sized pieces.

For a more detailed explanation of this issue, see Aish.com's excellent guide to “Pesach Cleaning Made Easy.”

(Source: Maimonides - Laws of Chametz 1:7, 2:13)

[phkrause]

10 Nisan

Creative Seder

Since everyone else is recovering from various broken bones this year, I'm doing the Seder at my house. So I took the opportunity to try to add a few creative ways to tell the story of freedom. Oy vey, did my brother-in-law fuss. He says we must do the "real" Seder.

I want to do a Seder that is meaningful to us, so we'd be involved instead of biding our time until the meal. I want the idea of freedom to translate to our lives today from the Sages of the past. Should I feel guilty about this?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Regarding the content of the Passover Seder and unlimited creativity, I would like to make the following suggestion:

Keep to the traditional Seder, and also make time for creative adventure.

Why? Not to placate your brother-in-law. But in order to preserve the true message of the Seder.

Which is?

National redemption from the shackles of Egyptian oppression by the All Powerful Creator of the World, Who subsequently gave us the Torah, the guide to life that teaches us how to free ourselves from our own personal shackles of oppression and live a life which brings true joy - which is closeness to the All Powerful Creator of the World.

With all due credit and admiration for creative input, the concept of freedom can easily be misunderstood. For some people, "freedom" might mean releasing oneself from God's rules - exactly the opposite of what the Passover Seder is supposed to mean!

Sticking to the traditional Seder guarantees that God will be part and parcel of the freedom. And frankly speaking, any Seder that He isn't part of, is not a Passover Seder.

I'm all for creativity. At my own Seder we act out different parts of the Haggadah and we all have a blast. We have big plastic animals and ping pong balls (hail) flying around the room during the Ten Plagues. But we have the basic structure of the Haggadah there to preserve the integrity of the message that has been passed on for thousands of years. A time-tested message, woven with the self-sacrifice and devotion of countless generations. A priceless message which is the key to Jewish identity and survival.

[phkrause]

11 Nisan

Rice and Beans

I just got married and have an important question: Can we eat rice on Passover? My wife grew up eating it, and I did not. Is this just a matter of family tradition?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

The Torah instructs a Jew not to eat (or even possess) chametz all seven days of Passover (Exodus 13:3). "Chametz" is defined as any of the five grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, and rye) that came into contact with water for more than 18 minutes. Chametz is a serious Torah prohibition, and for that reason we take extra protective measures on Passover to prevent any mistakes.

Hence the category of food called "kitniyot" (sometimes referred to generically as "legumes"). This includes rice, corn, soy beans, string beans, peas, lentils, peanuts, mustard, sesame seeds and poppy seeds. Even though kitniyot cannot technically become chametz, Ashkenazi Jews do not eat them on Passover. Why?

Products of kitniyot often appear like chametz products. For example, it can be hard to distinguish between rice flour (kitniyot) and wheat flour (chametz). Also, chametz grains may become inadvertently mixed together with kitniyot. Therefore, to prevent confusion, all kitniyot were prohibited.

In Jewish law, there is one important distinction between chametz and kitniyot. During Passover, it is forbidden to even have chametz in one's possession (hence the custom of "selling chametz"). Whereas it is permitted to own kitniyot during Passover and even to use it - not for eating - but for things like baby powder which contains cornstarch. Similarly, someone who is sick is allowed to take medicine containing kitniyot.

What about derivatives of kitniyot - e.g. corn oil, peanut oil, etc? This is a difference of opinion. Many will use kitniyot-based oils on Passover, while others are strict and only use olive or walnut oil.

Finally, there is one product called "quinoa" (pronounced "ken-wah" or "kin-o-ah") that is permitted on Passover even for Ashkenazim. Although it resembles a grain, it is technically a grass, and was never included in the prohibition against kitniyot. It is prepared like rice and has a very high protein content. (It's excellent in "cholent" stew!) You should be able to find it at most health food stores. Of course, it needs to be from a closed container that is new for Pesach.

Interestingly, the Sefardi Jewish community does not have a prohibition against kitniyot. This creates the strange situation, for example, where one family could be eating rice on Passover - when their neighbors will not. So am I going to guess here that you are Ashkenazi and your wife is Sefardi. Am I right?

(sources: Maimonides - Laws of Chametz and Matzah 5:1; Code of Jewish Law - O.C. 453)

[phkrause]

12 Nisan

Passover Pet Food

I recently got a pet dog and am not sure what to feed it over Passover. He is used to our food, however he does need his artificial bones or he will chew the furniture instead! What are the laws for dealing with pet food made of chametz? Obviously it isn't intended to be eaten by a Jew, but it is in our possession. Is there kosher for Passover dog food?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Jews around the world are perplexed by what to feed the family pet during Passover. The Talmud states that not only is it forbidden for a Jew to eat chametz on Passover, but it is also forbidden to own chametz or to have any benefit from it.

Additionally, it is forbidden to have a non-Jew give your pet chametz since we are not to derive any benefit from chametz on Passover "• and feeding your pet is regarded as "deriving benefit."

Yet... if the dog is not properly fed, he will chew the furniture instead! What to do?

You simply have to feed your pet human food that is kosher for Passover. Alternatively, there are stores which sell pet foods that are kosher for Passover, and may even ship nationally.

Also, it is permitted to feed pets kitniyot "• rice, corn, soy beans, etc. "• which Ashkenazi Jews do not eat on Passover.

If this becomes unusually difficult, there is a leniency to buy regular pet food. However this is providing that all the following conditions are fulfilled:

• humans would never eat this food

• the ingredients do not contain any wheat, oats, other grains - nor any "by-products" of these

• it contains no meat and milk together (which is a separate, non-Passover problem)

• the pet food is purchased before Passover begins

• finally, one must check with a qualified rabbi to ensure that the pet food cannot cause other doughs to rise (se'or)

Even aquarium foods must not contain chametz. Most flake or pellet fish foods contain wheat products. This includes the most popular name brands such as Wardley's and Tetra-min. Alternative foods for your fish on Passover are the various freeze-dried worms, live foods, or frozen foods. (Freeze-dried blood worms are commonly available "• the icky name is only because of the red color.) Be sure to check the labels of any commercial foods.

Happy Passover! Woof woof!

(sources: Talmud - Pesachim 21a; Chayei Adam, Hilchot Pesach 121:7 and 124:12; Teshuvas HaRosh 36:2; Ohr Samayach - Hilchos Chametz 4:10)

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13 Nisan

Selling Chametz

I am becoming more interested in Jewish observance, and with Passover coming soon, I started thinking about how my grandparents would always sell their chametz (bread, etc.) before the holiday. Can you give me some info about selling chametz for Passover in the modern days?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

One way to dispose of chametz is to burn it – as is customary to do the morning prior to the Passover Seder.

However, many of us have a lot of chametz around the house and would like some way of disposing of it, without having to destroy it all. Hence the institution of selling chametz to a non-Jew prior to the holiday.

The sale must be a full and valid sale. It is not a charade. If not done properly, then the chametz will mistakenly remain in our possession throughout Passover! This is why we have a knowledgeable rabbi arrange the sale.

The contract is worded in a way so that the non-Jew actually has the option of purchasing all the chametz. Inevitably, however, the non-Jew winds up making a small profit from the entire transaction by transferring back the chametz right after the holiday.

Many have a custom not to sell real edible chametz like bread, crackers, whiskey, etc. The exception is when getting rid of it will involve a hardship – i.e. you've got a large quantity of it, it's difficult to obtain, or it's expensive. Certainly you can include a half-bottle of scotch in the sale. Otherwise, you can give the food away to a non-Jewish acquaintance. Some cities specifically host food drives for poor people in the days prior to Passover.

But what about food that's not "real" chametz – i.e. a can of tuna fish that's not labeled "Kosher for Passover," or food that was cooked in a chametz pot? These things you can sell and just not use during Passover.

Whatever you are selling should be put it into a separate cabinet, then locked (or taped shut), and labeled "sold." Your chametz will be sold at mid-morning, local time, on the day of the Seder. It may not be accessed after that time.

By the way, even chametz belonging to a non-Jew that is in your possession must be put away and covered.

Good luck – and just hope that the non-Jew who buys your chametz doesn't decide to undergo conversion during the week of Passover. That would really complicate things!

[phkrause]

14 Nisan

Archaeology and the Exodus

I am in touch with someone who is interested in Judaism, but wants to understand its validity from a historic and archeological perspective. He is very bright, a Ph.D. in mathematics.

He made me a challenge that he would take Judaism seriously if I could prove that historically the Exodus story is true. He says that based on historians and archeologists, there is no evidence of a Jewish people enslaved in Egypt under the pharaohs. He claims that scholars state that Egyptian record keeping and other artifacts (or lack thereof) prove this.

My friend is looking for hard scholarly evidence, as opposed to what he calls "some white-bearded rabbi who is quoting from the Jewish texts." What documentation can you provide?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Since my beard is not white, I suppose I qualify to answer.

In 2001, a storm of debate erupted in the Jewish world, following the assertion by Rabbi David Wolpe of Los Angeles that "the way the Bible describes the Exodus is not the way it happened, if it happened at all." Wolpe made his declaration before 2,000 worshippers at the Conservative Sinai Temple, and the speech was reported on the front page of the Los Angeles Times. The article, entitled "Doubting the Story of Exodus," asserts that archaeology disproves the validity of the biblical account.

While people don't usually get worked up about archaeology, the debate about archaeology and the Bible is often passionate and vitriolic.

Biblical Archaeology is often divided into two camps: The "minimalists" tend to downplay the historical accuracy of the Bible, while the "maximalists," who are in the majority and are by and large not religious, tend to suggest that archaeological evidence supports the basic historicity of the Bible text.

As a science, we must understand what archaeology is and what it isn't.

Archaeology consists of two components: the excavation of ancient artifacts, and the interpretation of those artifacts. While the excavation component is more of a mechanical skill, the interpretive component is very subjective. Presented with the same artifact, two world-class archaeologists will often come to different conclusions – particularly when ego, politics and religious beliefs enter the equation.

In the subjective field of Biblical Archaeology, anyone making a definitive statement like "archaeology has proven..." has probably chosen to take sides and is not presenting the whole picture. When the Los Angeles Times writes that "the rabbi was merely telling his flock what scholars have known for more than a decade," it is revealing an anti-biblical bias.

Admittedly, however, there is a shortage of Egyptian documentation of the Exodus period. Why?

We need to understand how the ancient world viewed the whole idea of recorded history. The vast majority of inscriptions found in the ancient world have a specific agenda – to glorify the deeds of the king and to show his full military power.

The British Museum in London displays inscriptions from the walls of the palace of the Assyrian Emperor, Sancheriv. These show scenes from Sancheriv's military campaigns from the 8th century BCE, including graphic depictions of destroyed enemies (decapitations, impalings, etc.). Sancheriv himself is depicted as larger than life.

But one element is missing from these inscriptions: There are no dead Assyrians! That is consistent with the ancient "historical" style – negative events, failures and flaws are not depicted at all. When a nation suffers an embarrassing defeat, they usually whitewash the mistakes and destroy the evidence.

The earliest known “objective historian," in our modern definition of the term, was the Greek writer Herodotus. He is generally considered the "father of historians" for his attempt to compile a dispassionate historical record of the war between the Greeks and Persians – 800 years after the Exodus (dated 13th century BCE).

This does not mean that early civilizations did not record events. It's just that their purpose was more propaganda than creating any kind of objective historical record.

This idea has significant ramifications for archeology and the Exodus. The last thing the ancient Egyptians wanted to record is the embarrassment of being completely destroyed by the God of a puny slave nation. Would the Egyptians ever want to preserve details of the destruction of fields, flocks, and first borns – plus the death of Pharaoh and the entire Egyptian army at the Red Sea?

In other words, we wouldn't expect to find prominent attention to Moses' humiliation of Pharaoh – even if it certainly occurred.

In one major event, the battle of Kadesh on the Orantes River between the Hitites and the Egyptian Pharaoh Ramses II, both sides record it as a major victory, and is depicted as such.

Interestingly, the Torah is unique among all ancient national literature in that it portrays its people in both victory and defeat. The Jews – and sometimes their leaders – are shown as rebels, complainers, idol-builders, and yes, descended from slaves. This objective portrayal lends the Torah great credibility. As the writer Israel Zangwill said: "The Bible is an anti-Semitic book. Israel is the villain, not the hero, of his own story. Alone among the epics, it is out for truth, not heroics."

Another factor here is that the archeological process is tedious and expensive. To date, only a tiny fraction of archeological sites related to the Bible have been excavated.

This thin archeological record means that conclusions are based on speculation and projection. Archeology can only prove the existence of artifacts unearthed, not disprove that which hasn't been found. Lack of evidence... is no evidence of lack.

Yet that has not stopped some archeologists from making bold assertions. In the 1950s, world-renowned archeologist Kathleen Kenyon dug in one small section of Jericho, looking for remnants of habitation at the time of Joshua's conquest of the land in 1272 BCE. She found no evidence, and concluded on that basis that the Bible was false.

The problem is that Kenyon dug only one small section of Jericho, basing her conclusion on that limited information. Today, though the controversy lingers, many archeologists claim there is indeed clear evidence of habitation in Jericho from the time of Joshua.

Archeology is a new science, and the record is far from complete. We have only begun to scratch the surface.

The Los Angeles Times makes another mistake in reading the biblical text without the accompanying Talmudic explanation. For example, in trying to demonstrate Biblical inconsistency, the Times writes: "One passage in Exodus says that the bodies of the Pharaoh's charioteers were found on the shore, while the next verse says they sank to the bottom of the sea." The Times unfortunately did not consult the preeminent Bible commentary, Rashi, who explains that after the Egyptians drowned, the sea threw them onto the shore, so that the Jewish people could be relieved at the knowledge that their enemies would no longer be in pursuit. (Exodus 14:30)

The credibility of the Times' article is further eroded by its quoting another Los Angeles rabbi who mistakenly asserts that it does not matter "whether we [Jews] built the pyramids." As it says clearly in Exodus 1:11 (and in the Passover Haggadah), the Jews "built the store-cities of Pitom and Ramses." Jews never built any pyramids, which were built in 2500 BCE – about 1200 years before the Exodus.

The Los Angeles Times asserts: "[M]ost congregants, along with secular Jews and several rabbis interviewed, said that whether the Exodus is historically true or not is almost beside the point."

We would disagree. The truth of the text is precisely the point. By attacking the veracity of the Exodus, and reducing it to mere fable, this knocks out the most basic Jewish principal of the past 3,300 years. Belief in God is predicated on the Exodus experience: "I am the Lord Your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt from the house of slavery" (Exodus 20:2).

The Jewish people have survived for thousands of years, against all odds, because we knew clearly the truth of Torah. When Jews in the Crusades chose to be burned at the stake rather than convert, they were not subscribing to some weak fable. To suggest otherwise is an insult to the millions of Jews who have died for our beliefs.

Whether layperson or rabbi, for those who reject the truth of Torah and the obligatory nature of commandments, rejecting the Torah's historical accounts follows suit.

For over 3,000 years, the Jewish people have faithfully transmitted the Exodus story, unique in the annals of world history. From parent to child, and teacher to student, it is an unbroken chain of transmission. Is it true?

To explore this topic, I recommend attending a Discovery Seminar, which presents an excellent overview of the gamut of Jewish history, philosophy, and literature. For a current schedule, go to: http://www.aish.com/dis/