Daily Lift by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

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#894 Let Shabbos Finish Your Work

The essence of Shabbos is peace of mind. Our attitude on Shabbos should be as if all the work we need to do has already been completed. If you need to travel or do any kind of work, on Shabbos you should try to feel as if you have reached your destination and every single job you have to take care of has already been completed.

All the laws of Shabbos serve as a recipe for attaining peace of mind. Not only are we to refrain from doing any form of work, but we are enjoined not to even discuss anything that has a connection with work.

(see Daas Chochma U'mussar, vol.2, p.204; Rabbi Pliskin - Gateway to Happiness, p.85)

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#895 The Sanctity of Shabbos

In Judaism, Shabbos is a time to be especially careful not to become angry or to become involved in a quarrel. Quarrels spread like fire and destroy everything that is precious. The sanctity of Shabbos, if it is observed properly, enables people to feel a sense of unity. It promotes love and brotherhood. The sanctity of Shabbos can spread and enter the hearts of each individual and everyone can become as one.

If you haven't had an authentic Shabbos experience, write me and I'll recommend someone in your area to contact.

(see Rabbi Chaim Zaitchyk -Maayanai Hachaim, vol.3, p.313; Rabbi Pliskin's "Consulting the Wise")

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#896 Worry Knot

Worry destroys one's life.

A life filled with worry is a miserable existence. Regardless of how much good fortune you have, you will be oblivious to it if you fill your mind with worrisome thoughts.

You would hate someone for trying to destroy your life. With constant worry, you are destroying your own life.

Make it a top priority to change your thinking habits, to benefit you in many ways.

(Keser Chochmah 12:16; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.154)

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#897 Be Happy With Your Lot

Do not yearn for any other situation in the world besides the one you actually find yourself in.

A person who masters this skill will never be sad about his life situation. He accepts his present situation as his particular challenge in life -- even when he is unable to change it.

This attitude is usually not mastered just by reading about it. Consistently work on integrating it into your thoughts. The more you repeat this thought to yourself, the more it becomes part of your thinking.

(Avraham ben HaRambam; Hamaspik L'ovdai Hashem, p.119; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.179)

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#898 Accepting Gratitude

When someone expresses gratitude for something you have done, express your gratitude for that person's gratitude. By accepting that person's words of gratitude, you are making it more likely that this person will continue to express gratitude to others.

(From Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's book: THANK YOU! Gratitude: Formulas, Stories, and Insights: Artscroll Publishers)

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#899 Evaluate Your Present Course

Even if you have devoted a lot of time and effort to some project, if you know now that it is better to cancel it, do so. The fact that you have invested much energy is irrelevant. Deal only with the question: "Is this the right thing to do now?"

It is illogical to continue something just because you already started it. The matter has to be worthwhile in its own right. What was invested in the past is already over with, and need not tie you down to wasteful activities.

(Chayai Hamussar, vol.2, p.162; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, pp.146-7)

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#900 Use Conceit To Drive You

The Chazon Ish once wrote to a close student who was very humble:

"It would be preferable if you had a bit of conceit. This would help you fight fatigue and laziness. Because you are so humble, you are only using your good inclination. It would be preferable if you would harness the energy of both your good and bad inclinations."

(see "Toras Hanefesh," p.99; Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Happiness," p.116)

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#901 Kindness Transforms You

Developing a love for kindness transforms your life, just as you transform the lives of others.

Kindness is one of the pillars of the world. Every act of kindness elevates your character and makes you a kinder person. And, as you continue to increase your love for kindness, you increase the amount of joy in your life.

(From Rabbi Pliskin's book Kindness)

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#902 Turn Your Enemies Into Friends

The fool turns a friend into an enemy.

The wise person turns an enemy into a friend.

(Tnuas Hamussar, vol.4, p.299; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p. 136)

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#903 Live Now

It is easy to build up in your imagination the amount of pleasure and happiness you will derive from future events. But by over-anxiously anticipating these future events, you lose your present moments. Frequently those future events turn out disappointing. You had exaggerated their value.

The way to make the most out of your life is to live every second as fully as possible. Regardless of your situation, you have the opportunity to utilize every moment for growth.

To someone who has adopted this attitude, it will not make a great difference how the exact details of life unfold. No matter how things turn out, he still has the opportunity to make it a growthful experience.

(Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.152)

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#904 All for the Best

Ultimately whatever happens to us is for our good. The Talmud relates a story about two people who wanted to travel by boat. One broke his foot and was unable to make the trip, while his friend got on the boat. The one who missed the boat cursed his misfortune. A few days later, however, he heard that the boat sank and all the passengers drowned. He began to praise the Almighty because he now realized his missing the boat was the best thing that could have happened to him.

A person should accept suffering that befalls him, since he cannot possibly know what good will come as a consequence of this ostensibly "negative" event.

(Orchos Tzadikim, ch.9; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.242)

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#905 Anger Is Only For Show

Maimonides wrote that the correct path is "moderation in all character traits."

As regards to anger, he writes: "Do not be hot-tempered and easy to anger, nor like a corpse without feelings. Rather show anger only over important matters in order to prevent others from behaving wrongly on future occasions... Even when you have a practical, constructive reason for getting angry, only appear as if you are angry, but inwardly remain calm."

(Hilchos Daios 1:4, 2:3; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.185)

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#906 Review What You Know

Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto (18th century Italy) writes in the introduction to his clasic work of Jewish ethics, "Path of the Just:"

"I did not write this book to teach people information they had not known previously. My intention was to remind them of knowledge they already possessed. As a matter of fact, you will find that most people already know the information that I have written. But to the degree that this knowledge is well-known and its truth self-evident, is the degree that people forget about these matters and are not consciously aware of them in their daily lives. Therefore, the benefit of reading such a book does not come from reading it just one time. You might find only a few bits of new information. You will derive benefit, however, from constant review. Keep reviewing ideas for self-improvement - even though on a certain level you already know them. When you constantly review important ideas, they will be at the forefront of your consciousness and you will thereby be able to apply them."

Today, think of some ideas, concepts, knowledge, or wisdom that you already know - but feel that you would gain from having at the forefront of your consciousness. Devise a plan to review that idea as frequently as you can.

(see Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto - Path of the Just, Intro)

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#907 Mistakes Help you Grow

The only way to avoid all mistakes is by not doing anything. But then you won't accomplish anything either.

A popular saying is: "There is no one wiser than a person with experience." Learn from your mistakes. They are an integral part of your becoming an expert at helping yourself and others.

(From Rabbi Pliskin's book Kindness)

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#908 Make the Most of Your Here And Now

Some people accomplish a great deal, yet they are unhappy because they keep thinking that "somewhere else" they might be able to accomplish more. They live their lives with the general feeling that whatever they are engaged in at the moment is nothing compared to what they might possibly do.

This feeling is a poison that destroys joy and happiness in life. While you should try to accomplish as much as you can, it is often an illusion that you are missing out by not being "somewhere else."

(see Rabbi Yosef Leib Bloch - Shiurai Daas, vol.2, p.150; Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Happiness," p.112)

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#909 Evaluate Situations Positively

Think of three situations where you had a negative emotional reaction - even though objectively it would have been possible to be positive.

Think of three situations where you had a positive emotional reaction simply because you evaluated the situation as positive - even though others might have evaluated it as negative.

(For a series of probing questions on this topic, see Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Self Knowledge," p.226)

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#910 Ask What You Need to Know

If a person lacks money to support himself, he should be willing to do work that would normally be considered beneath his dignity. This is preferable to acting as if he has plenty of money, when actually he is in want of bread.

Similarly, when it comes to Torah and wisdom. A person should admit that he does not know, and be willing to ask others. Don't be embarrassed. Don't pretend you know what you do not really know. It will only cause you to remain ignorant.

Today, think of a question you would like to have answered, but have refrained from asking out of fear of embarrassment. Muster your courage and ask someone the question!

(see Vilna Gaon - Proverbs 12:19; Rabbi Pliskin - "Consulting the Wise")

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#911 Practice What You Know

If you visit the best doctor in the world and the doctor cures you, you will become ill again if you do not follow the doctor's instructions. Can anyone blame the doctor? It is your own fault for not following the doctor's suggestions.

Similarly with wisdom, the ideas will only be able to help you if you constantly put them into practice.

Today, ask yourself: What ideas that I already know would make a major difference in my life if I applied them?

(see Chochmah Umussar 1:305; Gateway to Happiness, p.68)

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#912 Life can be a Constant Party

The Torah says the life of someone who has a positive attitude about all that occurs is likened to a life of constant parties. (see Proverbs 15:15) His entire life is full of happiness and joy. Such a person does not need special situations to supply him with happiness. Whatever he does and wherever he is, he finds things to be happy about. He grows constantly from each experience and from each person with whom he comes into contact.

Mastering this attitude requires time and effort, but is a very worthwhile investment. If you want your life to be a constant party…

(see Gateway to Happiness, p.48)

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#913 Be Grateful For Past Benefits From Schools and Jobs

When a person leaves a school or a job for another school or job, he should keep in mind what he is grateful for. Even if he feels he is benefiting more from his new school or new job, he should remember what he gained in the past from the previous places.

There are many reasons why a person might have been dissatisfied at a previous place where he was. Nevertheless, he still gained and benefited from the people of that place. It's easy for many people to remember the negative aspects of previous places, especially if a person left on not such friendly terms. They might want to throw verbal stones at the prior school or job. Our debt of gratitude tells us not only not to speak against that place, but to say or do things that are an expression of gratitude.

Look at the previous place with a good eye. When you speak about it, begin your sentences with, "I am grateful to them for…" When you do so, you are expressing your own positive character.

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#914 Appreciate Life To Its Fullest

I heard a number of times from Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz, the late head of Mirrer Yeshiva in Jerusalem: "When we learn to appreciate life to its fullest, we will be oblivious to many of its painful aspects. We will definitely try to deal with them effectively, but will not feel emotional suffering, since the joy of being alive will outweigh anything negative that might occur.

"Imagine a person who just now won a large sum of money in a lottery. He will feel such joy that if he accidentally broke a glass cup, he would feel no suffering whatsoever because of that loss.

"The joy of being alive can be much greater than the joy of winning millions of dollars. A person able to master this attitude, which takes time and effort, will not have psychosomatic difficulties, since he will not view anything that happens to him as negative."

Even before someone totally masters this, it helps greatly to reflect on what it would be like integrating this.

(Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.254)

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#915 Staying Focused in Prayer

Prayer has tremendous potential for spiritual elevation and intense pleasure. How tragic that such a great opportunity is sometimes regarded as a boring chore!

On one extreme, some people think that the object of prayer is to just rattle off words. On the other extreme, some people try so hard to pray properly that they become very tense and nervous.

The way to have an elevating prayer experience is to calmly recite the words, while keeping in mind that you are speaking to the Omniscient Creator of the Universe. Whenever an external thought comes into your mind, gently return your focus to what you were saying in your prayers. You need not fight other thoughts - just ignore them, and once again concentrate on the words of the prayers you are reciting. If the thoughts that come up concern a practical problem that must be dealt with, set a time later in the day when you will address that matter.

(see Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Happiness," p.100)

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#916 Have A Compassionate Eye

When you watch other people, what you see depends on what is important to you at the time. A barber will notice styles and quality of haircuts. A tailor will notice clothing. A salesman will notice potential customers. A critical person will notice what is wrong. And a compassionate person will notice opportunities to be compassionate.

Be compassionate. This elevates you greatly.

(From Rabbi Pliskin's book Kindness)

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#917 Hear the Underlying Factors

If you get insulted, ask yourself, "What underlying factors are motivating this person to insult me?" Regardless of the words the person is using, the underlying message is that he is frustrated or discouraged. Try to react towards him in the context of his underlying problems and not his actual words.

(Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Happiness," p.297)

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#918 The Power Of Joy

The Kotzker Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel, said:

"With joy, we are able to extricate ourselves from all types of suffering."

(Amud Ha'Emes, p.90; Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.253)