Daily Lift by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

[Naomi]

pkrause, this is a very important in the mindset that of how we are trained to react through sports and other measures of being a successful person. I don't think that anyone consciously thinks that to be the best is to be better than Salley or Joe.

Quote:

People who feel the need to be "the best" often suffer much anxiety. They frequently tell themselves, "If I am not the best, then I am a failure. I am nothing."

And, this is the final outcome of the overachievers of our modern world.

[phkrause]

#362 Prepare For The Best

The best time to mentally prepare yourself for times of adversity is when things are going well and you are in a resourceful state. Adversity is a challenge that enables you to develop attributes that wouldn't be developed in easier times. Keep building up the inner resources that will enable you to cope well with difficulties. If you are in the middle of a difficulty right now, then right now is the best time to build up those resources. You won't have to wait and see if the inner resources you need are becoming a part of you, you will see results right away.

Develop courage and confidence. Develop persistence and resilience. Develop optimism and hope. How can you develop these qualities? Visualize yourself mastering them. See, hear, and feel yourself being confident and courageous. See, hear, and feel yourself persisting and bouncing back. Right now feel an inner sense of optimism that you will cope well with difficulties. And if a difficulty arises that you don't cope with as well as you wished, learn from the experience to cope better next time.

[phkrause]

#363 Re-View Your Past

Think about past experiences that you didn't exactly enjoy. Look back at those experiences and view them as part of your lifetime growth seminar. Keep learning new lessons and gain new strengths.

[phkrause]

#364 Make A Top Ten List

Make A Top Ten List

When you feel that problems are weighing you down, make a list of 10 reasons why you can still be happy.

If the reasons come from an external source, you might brush them off. But if you develop a list yourself, you will always be able to find at least 10 reasons that are "real" to you.

[phkrause]

#365 Act As If In Company

When strangers are present, a person finds it much easier to control his temper than when he is just among family.

The next time you feel angry at a member of your family, think how you would act differently if a stranger were present.

[phkrause]

#366 Insults Come From Ignorance

Rabbi Yitzhak Meltzin never got angry with another person. If someone insulted him, he always ignored it. He said, "It is wrong to insult someone, and if this person insulted me it is because he lacks the necessary understanding. So why should I be angry at someone for his ignorance?"

[Naomi]

Excellent!!

[phkrause]

#367 Give People What They Want

Every person in the world waits for signs of recognition and affection.

Students wait for signs of friendliness from their teacher; teachers await signs of respect from students. Children want signs of empathy from their parents; parents hunger for affection from their children. A customer wants his needs to be understood; a salesperson needs to feel that his merchandise is appreciated.

So give people what they want!

[phkrause]

#368 The Benefits Of Trust

When you have trust in the Almighty, you have peace of mind. Even in very troubled times, a person with this trust will be able to handle life without worry and sadness. He experiences joy regardless of how much he possesses. He does not feel a lack, and he does not worry about what will happen tomorrow. He feels intensely that when he has this trust, he has everything.

Moreover, even if he does lack something today, he does not worry about it. His situation is similar to a growing, successful company. Even if on one particular day no orders come in, they don't worry. They know they have the right product and eventually will make a large profit.

So, too, with a person who has trust in the Almighty. Even if he is temporarily missing some things he needs, he will not complain. He feels secure that the Almighty will send him all that he truly needs. He maintains an inner serenity because he is certain that his path is the path of life.

[phkrause]

#369 The Torah View Of Man

From the Torah viewpoint humans are the goals and the purpose of the entire creation. Without the Torah perspective, there is no essential difference between a human and a donkey.

Someone looking at the world from a completely secular viewpoint has no basis for the value of man. On the philosophical level, man would have no more inherent worth than any other piece of matter.

[phkrause]

#370 Help As Only You Can

Every person has unique talents, skills, knowledge, and resources.

Utilize these to help others in ways that are uniquely yours. Learn from the kind deeds of other people, but don't compare yourself with anyone else. Others will be able to do things that you can't. And only you will be able to do certain things.

[phkrause]

#371 Your Attitude Toward Insults

Some people mistakenly say, "He hurt my feelings," or "He made me feel bad." But in actuality, no one can hurt your feelings or make you feel bad -- unless you allow their words to affect you. Your attitude toward an insult causes you pain, not the insult itself.

The emotional pain of an insult comes from what you add to it.

[phkrause]

#372 Don't Spread The Insult

Some people become so upset when they are insulted, that they repeat the incident to others who would otherwise not know about it! By giving the matter additional attention, you are causing yourself additional embarrassment!

[phkrause]

#373 Way To A Happy Life

The only way to have a happy life is to keep your eyes focused on what you have and not on what you are lacking.

[phkrause]

#374 Take A New Look At Life

The Almighty creates everything anew, every single second. Each moment is like the very beginning of creation.

Viewing the world in this light will preserve its freshness in your eyes.

[phkrause]

#375 Breathe In Life

Often what seems to be a depressing situation is due only to the lack of fresh air. Get out into the air and breathe deeply, or at least open the window and fill your lungs.

Your emotions become normalized when your body is invigorated by the influx of cool, moist and moving air. This often has immediate effects. Drink deeply of the Almighty's bounty, and inhale a lungful of the champagne of life.

[phkrause]

#376 Learn From All Of Life

Be resolved to learn constantly from everyone in your immediate surroundings. When you see someone with positive character traits, learn from him traits you can work on developing. And when you see someone with negative traits, focus on the harm of having those traits!

Keep learning from life itself. There is no phenomenon in the world from which you cannot learn something practical. By utilizing every opportunity to gain wisdom, you will constantly keep improving and growing.

Today, list at least five people you encounter frequently. Then think of a positive quality you can learn from each one.

[phkrause]

#377 Assess Your Growth In Marriage

Everyone wants a happy marriage. The best way to ensure a happy marriage is to master the ability to experience joy in your life with each moment of growth. And each moment is an opportunity to grow. There are many forms of growth in marriage. Growth can mean you are happy with your marriage and constantly grateful to G-d. Growth can mean that you have a partnership that is eternal for both of you. Growth can mean that you are increasing your appreciation for doing acts of kindness. Growth can mean that you are improving in your character traits. Growth can mean that you act in an elevated manner even though things are difficult. Growth can mean that you develop resources to turn around a difficult situation. Growth can mean that you transcend your natural tendencies in order to be compassionate and forgiving.

Growth can mean that you make sacrifices for the benefit of your spouse and children. Growth can mean that you sustain a loving and respecting manner - even though this may not be reciprocated. Growth can even mean that you have the courage to end an abusive situation. Growth always means that you act according to G-d's will.

Growth always means that the Torah is your guide for which patterns of speech and action to increase... and which to eliminate from your repertoire.

[phkrause]

#378 Life as a Growth Seminar

When people go to workshops and seminars that will help them develop and grow, they are willing to try out all types of exercises and experiments. They consider it fun and enjoyable to do things that they have not done before and might even have experienced as distressful. But since it is being defined as part of the growth experience, they reframe it in a positive manner. In fact, the more difficult something is, the more you gain by trying it out. When you view your entire life as a growth seminar and all that happens as just exercises and experiments, each experience teaches you something. You learn something from each reaction. You learn how to prepare yourself for similar things that might occur in the future. The difficult becomes fun. Even what is not that enjoyable is viewed in a positive light for it enriches you and adds depth.

[phkrause]

#379 Your Anger Causes You Harm

The Talmud states: "When a person becomes angry, he acquires only his anger."

There are usually no benefits in becoming angry at others. Becoming angry merely causes harm to your health and makes you feel miserable. Your anger does not help you, and the person you are angry with usually pays less attention to what you are saying than if you'd have said it tactfully and patiently.

[Naomi]

[phkrause]

#380 Visualize Without Fear

Make it a regular practice to mentally visualize yourself behaving in a fearless manner in situations where you presently experience fear. Think of something that, if you would be able to do it, would make a big difference in your life and vividly imagine yourself doing it without fear.

[phkrause]

#381 Re-Channel Your Enthusiasm

Develop even more enthusiasm for doing good deeds and spiritual growth - than you have for financial gain and physical pleasures.

[phkrause]

#382 The Most Satisfying Pleasure

When it comes to matters pertaining to this world, it is never possible to be completely satisfied. If you seek only physical pleasures, regardless of how much you do have, you will always be lacking.

But when you make it your main ambition to serve the Almighty, you will feel a sense of wholeness. The pleasure of serving the Almighty is so intense that it is above any other pleasures. Hence when you attain this, you are missing nothing.

[phkrause]

#383 Reapply Old Ideas

My father's teacher, who was known as the Chofetz Chaim, used to say, "There is a popular expression that "Every fool is wise in respect to himself. My experience has shown that many wise people act like fools with respect to themselves."

Many important concepts for living sound quite simple and obvious. Think of an idea that you dismissed as not being for you because you felt that you had already mastered it or, just the opposite, it was too difficult for you. Now find a way that you can apply that idea.

With the next idea that you come across today, ask yourself, "How can I apply this?"