Daily Lift by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

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Self Discipline

The Torah tells the story of how Joseph was in prison in Egypt. This is a model of how anyone in any situation can grow. After Joseph was released from prison he became a powerful ruler. That is because in prison he used his mental ability to train himself to master the attribute of total self-discipline. In prison he ruled over himself, and he went on to rule over the Egyptian nation.

Today, think of a difficult situation you are in, and consider how you might use this to develop mastery over self.

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See Others As They See Themselves

Develop the habit of seeing other people as they see themselves. All anger, hatred and quarrels arise simply because a person views the situation from his own perspective, and fails to see the viewpoint of the other person.

For example, if a poor person asks someone who is wealthy for financial assistance, the wealthy person might view the request as insolence and become angry. The poor person feels insulted and perplexed. He thinks to himself, "The Almighty has given him so much, why doesn't he share what he has with me?" They separate from each other with a quarrel and mutual bad feelings. If each would try to understand the position of the other, however, even though they still might not agree, the majority of conflicts and complications that arise in interpersonal relationships could be avoided.

The next time you find yourself in a potential quarrel with another person, view the situation from his perspective also. Then step out of the picture and try to view the situation objectively as if a third party was viewing both of you. Notice the difference that this makes!

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Serenity is True Success

King Solomon says in Proverbs 17:1: "Better a morsel of dry bread and tranquility with it, than a house full of feasting with strife."

The prosperity and success of the wicked, however impressive, is only an illusion. Many people live in a state of discord - with family, co-workers and neighbors. Far better is the life of the righteous man - even if he has only a crust of bread - because he has peace in his home.

Inner serenity is the essence of true success in life, and this is totally independent of material possessions.

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The Value Of Being Alone

A person who does not know how to use his mind productively will flee from the state of being alone. But when a person has learned how to think, he will greatly appreciate the moments when he is by himself, for then he will be able to utilize those moments for intellectual and spiritual growth.

During a quiet moment today, appreciate the value of being alone.

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Pray One-on-One

The idea of prayer is to inwardly have a private dialogue with the Creator. Speak to Him just as you might speak with a friend who is paying attention and listening.

All around you may be noise, traffic, planes, telephones. Inwardly, too, may be a preoccupation with hassles, business dealings, quarrels, competition, desires.

But prayer brings you suddenly to… quiet. The inward silence creates a barrier to the flow of noise, and it is as if there is silence and calm all around. Tranquility is yours!

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Just Ask

You might find it difficult to ask someone a question or to ask someone to help you out. Telling yourself, "Just ask," might make it easier.

Before saying these two words, you might have been debating whether or not to ask. Even though you know you have a right to ask and that it will be beneficial to ask, you feel a bit uncomfortable. As you say to yourself, "Just ask," you might just go ahead and actually ask. In many situations you will find that asking is much easier than you had expected.

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The Two Skills of Happiness

Happiness is a skill that can be learned. To acquire this skill, it is necessary to master two basic skills:

1) The ability to focus on happiness-producing thoughts, as opposed to those which cause unhappiness.

2) The ability to evaluate events and situations as positive instead of negative. (Or at least to lower the degree of negativity - i.e. rather than considering some discomfort as a tragedy, evaluating it as minor.)

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Just Change Mental Channels

With a radio, when you change the channel, you change what you hear. Your mind can be likened to a special radio show. You are the producer of the show. You choose what messages are broadcast. A standard radio offers limited programs; your mind offers unlimited choices. You have the ability to decide what mental channel you want to listen to right now. Think about the worthwhile mental channels from which you can choose. You can create new ones at any moment you wish. When you aren't satisfied with the channel you are listening to, just choose a mental channel that is worth choosing.

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Focus On The Present Benefit

If someone wronged you or quarreled with you in the past, try to change that dynamic in the present. Right now -- can you do acts of kindness for him? Can you gain from his wisdom or experience? Can you have a worthwhile relationship?

If the answer is yes to any of these questions, then disregard your past experiences, and deal with this person in the present.

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Just Choose Wisely Now

At each moment of every day, you choose your thoughts, words, and actions. You even choose your feelings by choosing your thoughts, words, and actions. So say, "Just choose wisely now."

The more frequently you choose wisely, the more this choice will become second nature. You probably know what happens to a person who keeps making wise choices of thoughts, feelings, words, and actions. They live their life much more wisely.

"But what if I don't always recognize the wisest choice?" Just saying, "Just choose wisely now," won't guarantee that you will always choose the wisest choices. But it will still be much better than saying, "Choose the stupidest choice!"

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Practice Creative Solutions

When you fear a confrontation in which you might become angry, mentally picture yourself handling it calmly and self-confidently. Keep repeating this picture in your mind until you feel fairly certain that you will be able to remain calm in the actual situation.

When you are walking or waiting in a line, utilize the opportunity to think of difficult situations, and find various options you have to deal wisely in those situations. If you live those situations in your mind, they can serve as positive resources from which to gain confidence in your abilities.

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Learn From Others Reactions

Just because others react to a situation in one way does not mean you also must react the same.

Some people might be extremely nervous or upset in certain situations, but you can still retain a calm and sensible manner.

Today, when you see others reacting with irritation, anger, or depression, ask yourself what other alternatives are possible. What are those people telling themselves and how can those self-statements be challenged?

In general, look for people who have peace of mind and happiness, and learn from them.

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The Outcome Of Your Actions Are Up To G-d

We discussed earlier that those who trust in G-d constantly have peace of mind.

This does not mean we should sit back and refrain from taking action for our welfare. Rather, it means that even when you do take action, you realize that the ultimate outcome is up to the Almighty. Hence you will have peace of mind regardless of the outcome.

Moreover, while you will take action, you will not panic. You will do what is necessary under the circumstances, but will not act out of anxiety and "desperation."

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Replace Blame With Compassion

A basic Torah principle is that when correcting someone, we need to do so with a sense of love and compassion. When you speak in a blaming manner, the message you give is not a loving one.

If there is a specific person you tend to speak to in a blaming manner, be resolved to speak to more pleasantly.

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Treat All Human Beings With Respect

We have an obligation to treat all human beings with the highest level of respect. Our politeness should spring from an awareness that we are all created in the image of God.

Today, think of someone you don't treat with the respect that you know you should. The next time you interact with that person, go out of your way to treat him or her with the respect due to someone created in the image of God.

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Commemorate Creation With Serenity

One day a week the Torah tells us to celebrate the creation of the universe. In the beginning of the creation, the world was missing "menuchah" - a total day of rest. Shabbos, the seventh day of the week, was created to complete the Creation. Each week we once again commemorate the most amazing event in history. By resting on this day, we make a statement acknowledging the Creator's creation.

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Just Do It

There are many things that we should do, but we procrastinate. We delay taking action. Doing nothing is often much easier then taking action. What can you say to get yourself moving? You can say, "Just do it."

Sometimes we really have a good reason or reasons for hesitating. Deep down we may feel that it's better for us not to take the action we're postponing. But we aren't yet clear about the entire matter. If you have an intuitive feeling that it might be unwise to take action, then wait. Think it over some more. Consult others.

But when you know that you or others will benefit if you take action and you don't have a valid reason for procrastinating, tell yourself, "Just do it."

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So I always wonder where Nike got that "Just Do It" from!! Now I know.

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Service Tip

Right this moment, there are a multitude of people all around the planet involved in serving you. Many of them you will never meet in person, but you will benefit greatly from their activities. There are farmers who are planting and harvesting for you. There are people in the clothing industry who are weaving the cloth and designing clothing you will eventually wear. There are trucks, boats, and planes that are shipping the food you will eat, the clothes you will wear, and many other items that you will buy or use. There are people who are involved in making certain that you have water, electricity, phone service, and books. The postal authorities are busy at work delivering the letters you sent and bringing you mail that others have sent you. There are inventors who are working day and night on items that will one day be yours. There are engineers, mechanics, and a wide variety of laborers all around the globe who toil for your benefit. There are medical researchers working to find cures for illness that might one day save your life. Whenever you see a large crowd of people, it is a reminder to be grateful to all of those who are involved in one way or another in enhancing the quality of your life.

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Just Keep Silent

Sometimes we know that saying something will make a situation worse. We can tell ourselves to, "Just keep silent." If we feel tempted to speak negatively about someone, we can strengthen our resolve not to say it by telling ourselves, "Just keep silent."

The more difficult it is to keep silent, the greater the resulting spiritual elevation. When you tell yourself, "Just keep silent," your silence isn't just a passive state of being. Rather, it is an act of remaining silent.

In Tehillim (Psalms 34), King David tells us: "Who is the person who wants life and loves days that he may see good? Guard your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit." Remaining silent instead of speaking against others enhances and lengthens life.

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Just Five Minutes

Sometimes when we want to study, we find it difficult to keep our focus on the topic at hand. But telling yourself, Just five minutes," will probably extend your focus for the next five minutes. You might then decide to study for "just (another) five minutes." These five-minute segments can be renewed as often as you choose.

There are many tasks that might need your attention, but you don't feel like doing them. However, you could find it relatively easy to take action for only five minutes. "Just five minutes" will enable you to do many things that you would otherwise neglect. Variations of this theme are: "Just ten minutes." "Just thirty minutes." "Just one hour."

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Goal Setting

Character development and spiritual goals are ultimately the most fulfilling. Trivial goals are better than not having a goal. But don't limit yourself. The greater your goals, the greater your potential for accomplishment and the more fulfilling your life.

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Advance Your Thinking

"How do I change the focus of my brain?" is a common question that people ask. "I tend to think of the negative. I worry a lot. My brain focuses way too much on thoughts that aren't conducive to happiness. How can I stop thinking about what I don't want to think about?"

A powerful tool that will help your brain move to the type of thoughts that you wish for is to tell it: "NEXT!" Then your brain will joyfully move on to another picture, idea, song, series of words, thoughts, imaginary scenes, visualizations, and anything else that brains like to do. Your brain can choose from an enormous amount of material that it already has stored in its immense library.

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Just Once

There are many positive and beneficial things that we know we should do, but we may feel that continuing to do them will be too difficult. "How can I keep being this way all the time?" we ask ourselves.

Telling ourselves, "Just once," can help us start. After we do something positive once, we begin to build up momentum; it becomes easier than we had assumed to keep doing the positive action more frequently.

Doing a worthwhile action "just once" doesn't seem so daunting. The next time it comes up, say you'll do it "just once" again. Even if it truly is difficult, since we only have to motivate ourselves "just once," right now, we can build up our level of inspiration and motivation.

Think of something that you would want to do but also consider difficult to repeat. At the next opportunity, start by taking action "just once." If you're having difficulty thinking of something to do "just once," keep thinking until you find an area to apply the power of "Just once."

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Just Pause

Being impulsive causes many mistakes and errors. Doing things impulsively will cause loss, damage, and harm. Saying things impulsively will cause you to say things better left unsaid. Thinking before you speak will enable you to think of the best way to say something. Thinking before you take action will enable you to consider whether you should do something, and how to do it if you should.

The two words that will remind you to stop and think are, "Just pause." As you pause, think to yourself, "What is the wisest thing for me to say and do now?"

Practice building the association in your mind between, "Just pause," and, "What is the wisest thing for me to say and do now?" How do you build the association? It's quite easy. You just repeat these two sentences together a number of times. Repeat them with an upbeat tone of voice, or sing them with your own tune. Enjoy the process. This way you will access positive feelings when you recall this association in "real life."